


The Echo of Your Touch

by MadisonAvenueDarling



Category: Carol (2015), The Price of Salt - Patricia Highsmith
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Lesbian Character, New York City, Romance, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-09
Updated: 2016-12-18
Packaged: 2018-07-29 14:56:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 52,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7688941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadisonAvenueDarling/pseuds/MadisonAvenueDarling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Therese had taken her camera and gone out for the afternoon. Her friend had suggested she be "more interested in humans.” She sat down, not looking for anything or anyone in particular. In the distance, she noticed a blond woman and small blond child near the lake. They seemed distressed about something happening on the water. She got up and moved a little closer to see what they were so concerned about.</p><p>Maybe Therese can help? Will she find the family she's longed for and the one true love of her life with Carol Aird?</p><p>Will a fateful meeting on a red carpet with Carolyn Ross, fashion icon/supermodel ruin it all?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Flutter

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: Popcorn is bad for swans! Well, I don't know that for sure, but people food seems like a bad idea for wild animals. Carry on.
> 
> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!  
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...
> 
> Disclaimer.  
> These characters are clearly not my own, just having a little fun with them. They are the creations of the brilliant Patricia Highsmith and Phyllis Nagy.

**Flutter:** A repetitive echo set up by parallel reflecting surfaces.

It was late in the day, the sun just starting its descent toward the horizon. Most people had left the park, or were packing up to leave. Parents were gathering their children, heading home for dinner and preparation for the week ahead. Several joggers ran by, completely focused on the path ahead of them. There were still a few people milling around the small lake in the center of the park. 

Therese had taken her camera and gone out for the afternoon. Her friend Dannie had suggested she be "more interested in humans.” So she headed to the park, as it offered good people watching and maybe she could shoot a few pictures of “humans”. She stopped at a vendor and bought a small bag of popcorn to munch on, then found a bench. She sat down, not looking for anything or anyone in particular. In the distance, she noticed a blond woman and small blond child near the lake. They seemed distressed about something happening on the water. She got up and moved a little closer to see what they were so concerned about.

Apparently, they had been playing with a remote controlled sailboat, and now were both completely focused on a large white swan that was attacking their small craft. The little girl danced around the edge of the water, while her mother tried to pilot the craft to safety. The angry bird had gotten ahold of the sail and was tipping the little vessel. It was almost underwater to the port side now. The swan’s mate was squawking, trying to shield their brood of cygnets from the offending ship.

Therese moved closer to them. She could now hear the conversation between mother and child.

“Mommy, he’s tipping my boat over!” the child cried.

“I know sweet pea, I’m trying to get it back,” the tall woman said as she operated the remote controls.

“Let go, Mr. Swan! Let go of my boat!” the little blond yelled at the large bird.

“Honey, don’t yell at him. He thinks we got too close to his lady and their little ones. We’ll get your boat back,” she said unconvincingly.

The boat was lurching away from the bird, but he still had the sail in his bill. Therese moved closer to the little girl near the edge of the lake. She tossed some popcorn into the water. The swan with the babies came over immediately and started pushing the floating puffs around in the water and eating them. The little birds were still small, but they seemed curious about the popcorn too. Therese threw a few more pieces into the water between the boat and the edge of the lake. The big swan saw the food and seemed to be deciding if he wanted to continue the fight with the offending toy, or investigate the food. The latter won out and he dropped the little boat and swam toward the popcorn.

The blond woman managed to get the boat safely to the edge and pull it out of the water. She set it on the ground and the little girl hugged her mother’s leg. Therese had set her popcorn on the ground and brought her camera up to snap some pictures of the swans, the little girl and the tall blond. The woman walked toward Therese with the little girl not far behind.

“Thank you. He seemed intent on sinking our little boat.” The woman smiled at Therese.

“Oh, it was noth … “ Therese couldn’t finish her sentence. She was looking into the most beautiful blue eyes she’d ever seen.

Carol had meant to just thank the young woman and be on her way, but she was lost in her large round emerald eyes. They stood staring at each other, not saying a word. Carol felt her arm start to swing back and forth.

“Mommy?”

“Oh ... um yes. As I was saying ..” She paused. “Thank you,” she said, still staring.

“You’re welcome. It really wasn’t any trouble,” Therese answered, still staring too.

“Rindy, thank …” Her attention turned from her daughter back to Therese. “I’m Carol, and this is Rindy.”

“Therese.” She extended her hand.

Carol took her hand and held it. Their hands fit together perfectly, the tingling warmth fusing them together. Therese felt it too. Her round eyes grew larger. Her focus on the blue before them intensified.

“Rindy, thank Therese for helping us get your boat back.”

“Thank you, Therese.” The little girl hugged her leg. “I really love my boat, and I didn’t think I would get it back.”

Therese broke her gaze with Carol and put her hand on the little girl’s head, her fingers lost in the soft blond curls. She realized she was still holding the woman’s hand. Her gaze returned to Carol, lost again in the serene blue.

Rindy let go of Therese’s leg and moved near her mother. She looked up and pulled at the hem of her mother’s jacket.

“Mommy?” No response. “Mommy?!” she whispered loudly to her mother. “Why are you staring at her? You said it’s not nice to stare at people.”

“Oh, um, sorry,” she said, reluctantly letting Therese’s hand slide from her own, not managing to pull her gaze away though. Her hand felt cold; she felt like she was incomplete now. It was almost as if her hand had been missing a piece, until she had joined it with Therese’s. A shiver ran through her body.

“No, no, I’m sorry. I just … ” Therese stammered, her hand suddenly cold. She nervously flattened it over her chest. “Do I know you?” Her cheeks colored.

“I don’t think so,” Carol said. Their eyes still locked. They both smiled shyly.

“Pssst, Mommy! You’re doing it again,” Rindy reminded her mother. “I’m hungry – are we still going to eat?”

“Yes, snowflake, just a minute,” she said, still staring into the big green eyes across from her. She put her arm over Rindy’s shoulders and hugged her close to her leg.

“Um, I’ll let you go then,” Therese said. She felt her chest constrict at the thought of her encounter with Carol ending so soon.

Carol didn’t want to let this woman out of her sight. She gathered her courage. “Therese, can we take you to dinner?” she said nervously, “I mean, if you don’t have plans, as a thank you for helping us get Rindy’s boat back.”

“You don’t have to …” _What am I thinking! _“Um, Ok.” She smiled at Carol.__

__Carol was immediately taken with the woman’s deep dimples that creased her cheeks. Her face was beautiful before, but her smile warmed Carol to her core. She would do almost anything to see that smile again._ _

__“Rindy wanted spaghetti. There is a little place just a couple of blocks away.” Carol gestured to her left._ _

__“I love spaghetti,” she said, dragging her eyes from Carol’s and smiling down at Rindy._ _

__“With meatballs?” Rindy asked._ _

__Therese felt like it was a test, so she squated down and smiled at Rindy. “Yes?!”_ _

__Rindy threw her arms around Therese’s neck and said, “Yes!” Therese wrapped an arm around the little girl and steadied her camera with the other._ _

__Therese looked up at Carol. She was smiling down at the two of them._ _

__“Shall we?” Carol asked._ _

__Therese stood and Rindy grabbed her hand. Therese was surprised. She looked to Carol to make sure it was all right with her. Carol smiled and tucked the toy boat into a bag, then slung it over her shoulder. She took Rindy’s other hand and watched as Therese dumped the popcorn for the swans and tossed the bag into the trash._ _

__“Sorry about your popcorn,” Carol said._ _

__“Oh, it’s ok. It was kind of stale anyway.”_ _

__“They don’t seem to mind.” Carol laughed, watching the swans greedily eating the snack._ _

__“Maybe it tastes better with lake water.” Therese laughed, smiling at Carol again._ _

The young woman’s laugh spread through Carol like she was an arid desert and Therese’s laugh was the long awaited rain. The warmth seeped into every cell of her body. _Who is this woman?_

“Ew, popcorn and lake water? Yuck!” Rindy put her two cents in. 

____Therese laughed with the little girl. “Spaghetti and meatballs will taste much better!” She looked back at Carol, their eyes locking again._ _ _ _

____“Can we go now? Why are you staring at each other again?” Rindy whined, pulling on Therese’s hand this time._ _ _ _

____“Oh, sorry,” she said, pulling her eyes away from Carol’s, focusing on the little girl._ _ _ _

____Hand in hand, the three of them made their way across the park. Joggers diverted into the grass around them as they passed. Rindy swung their arms as they walked. Therese dropped behind to let other people pass, still holding the little girl’s hand. Therese and Carol sneaked looks at each other, shyly smiling when they made eye contact._ _ _ _

____“There it is, Bianco’s.” Carol pointed across the street from where they were standing. “We can cross the street up there.”_ _ _ _

____They made their way across the street and ducked in the door of the small restaurant. It was old, but well kept and clean. The waiting area was small with a hostess stand and a bench under the large window next to the door. A short round woman with dark hair and glasses came around the corner and greeted them. She wore a black dress and black pumps with a low heel. Her dark hair was in a bun and she had on a red apron that had streaks of flour across it._ _ _ _

____“Carola! Rindy! It’s been so long!” She gave them both hugs._ _ _ _

____“Eleanora! It’s so good to see you.” Carol returned her hug._ _ _ _

____“And who is this?” She turned and smiled at Therese._ _ _ _

____“This is our new friend Therese,” Rindy said proudly. “She saved my boat from a mean swan!”_ _ _ _

____“Did she now? She must be very brave!” she said to Rindy. “Hello Therese, I’m Eleanora. It’s nice to meet you.” She took Therese’s hand and held it in both of hers. She returned her attention to Carol. “Are you here for dinner?”_ _ _ _

____“Yes, if you can fit us in. I know it’s a little early for you.”_ _ _ _

____“Oh yes, there is always a table for you Carola dear. Rindy, would you like some crayons and a picture to color?” she asked._ _ _ _

____“Yes please,” Rindy answered. She looked up at Therese, “Will you color with me?”_ _ _ _

____“I would love to.” Therese smiled down at her._ _ _ _

____She picked up some menus, a child’s placemat, and crayons, “This way.” she said._ _ _ _

____There appeared to be two rooms. She lead them to a long room with several booths down both sides and three tables down the center. Red cloths covered the tables with white napkins and silverware. There was a candle and several small glass shakers on each table._ _ _ _

____“Table or booth?” Eleanora asked._ _ _ _

____Carol looked at Therese, who shrugged her shoulders._ _ _ _

____“Booth!” Rindy said happily._ _ _ _

____“Booth it is.” Carol smiled at their hostess._ _ _ _

____She led them to a booth. A tall thin young man stepped next to Eleanora, smiling at their guests._ _ _ _

____“I want to sit by Therese,” Rindy said, dropping her mother’s hand and grabbing Therese’s._ _ _ _

____Carol looked at Therese, unsure if the young woman wanted to sit next to the small child. Therese smiled and nodded in agreement. Rindy slid in first, then Therese. Carol took the other side._ _ _ _

____“Antonio, this is Carol, Rindy, and Therese. Please treat them as family. Can you grab a booster for the little one?” Eleanora placed the picture and crayons in front of Rindy and handed the adults their menus._ _ _ _

____Antonio stepped away and returned with a booster for Rindy. Therese helped the little blond into the chair._ _ _ _

____“Better?” she asked Rindy._ _ _ _

____“Better!” Rindy settled in, looking at the crayons to begin coloring. “Therese, what color would you like?”_ _ _ _

____“Red, please,” Therese said. Rindy handed her the red crayon. The picture was of two dogs sitting at a table with a candle, both eating spaghetti, a single noodle connecting their mouths. She started coloring the table cloth in the picture, while Rindy chose the yellow crayon and started on the moon that was in a corner over the dogs._ _ _ _

Carol looked across the table at them as they colored. Her heart warmed watching her little girl with Therese. She wondered again, _Who is this woman? Rindy seems so comfortable with her, and she with the little girl. _She picked up the menu and looked it over. She didn’t need to look at it. They came here enough to know the choices.__

______“Rindy?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The little girl looked up at her mother._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Spaghetti and meatballs, right?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yes, Mommy. Therese too!”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Carol looked at Therese while she spoke to Rindy, “Sweet pea, maybe Therese wants to try something else?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“No, that’s fine.” She looked up, smiling at Carol._ _ _ _ _ _

______Their eyes found each other for the first time since they entered the restaurant. It felt like the first time all over again. They smiled as they looked into each other’s eyes. Carol stretched her leg out, inadvertently touching Therese’s leg with her own. She went to pull it away, whispering, “Sorry.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______She then felt Therese move her foot between Carol’s, their ankles touching now. Carol held her breath. She didn’t move her legs or feet for fear the young woman would withdraw._ _ _ _ _ _

______Therese tilted her head a little to the side in question. Carol moved her leg forward, their calves now touching. Therese’s smile grew, but had a more mischievous look to it now. Carol lifted an eyebrow, and Therese stretched her other leg out, Carol’s leg now between both of Therese’s. Therese lifted her eyebrow in response. A fire raced up Carol’s leg, her eyes now twice the size they had been before. Therese tilted her head down, then back over to Rindy. Her legs remained exactly as they were._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Can I have the brown crayon?” she asked Rindy, as if nothing unusual were going on under the table._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yes. What are you going to color next?” Rindy asked._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Is it ok if I color the little dog?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yes! I’ll color the bigger dog. What color do you think?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Carol watched them discuss their artwork and color choices, both of their heads bent together._ _ _ _ _ _

Therese moved her leg slightly, causing Carol to suck in a breath. _Jesus, it’s as if no one has ever touched me before. _She closed her eyes trying to maintain her composure. When she opened them, she saw the hint of a dimple cross Therese’s cheeks.__

________Antonio approached the table. Carol ordered for them all, adding a bottle of chianti for her nerves. He came back with the a glass of milk for Rindy, wine, bread and a salad served family style. Carol used the tongs to dish a small salad for Rindy and one for herself._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Therese?” Therese looked up from her coloring. “Would you like some salad? Wine?” Carol asked._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yes, both please,” she answered._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol dished Therese a salad and poured her some wine. They each picked up their wine glasses and said “Cheers” together._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese looked over at Rindy. “Should we finish this after we eat?” pointing to their artwork._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“It’s just salad, I don’t want any salad,” Rindy said defiantly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Really?” Therese asked surprised._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“It’s green. Yuck!” Rindy scrunched up her face._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Oh, that’s a shame,” Therese said, looking sad._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Why?” Rindy said, putting her hand on Therese’s shoulder._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I was hoping you would play my game with me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“What game?” She clearly had piqued Rindy’s curiosity._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“When I was little, I didn’t like green things either. I came up with a game to make it fun.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“What’s the game Therese, what’s the game?” Rindy asked excitedly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________She leaned over and whispered in Rindy’s ear, “I look at the vegetables and I try to think what animal would like to eat this?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“So if it’s a carrot, you would be a rabbit?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Exactly! You’re a fast learner! Then I pretend to be that animal.” Therese smiled at Rindy. “Sometimes, you have to be more than one animal, or,” she paused for effect, “you find a friend to play too.” She gave Rindy a big smile and squeezed her knee. Rindy giggled, clearly ticklish._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol was completely absorbed in their interaction. What magic was Therese conjuring over there? Rindy didn’t really like to eat vegetables. Especially when they were out. Carol tried, but usually just gave up. She could see Rindy was taking the bait hook, line, and sinker._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“So, what do we have here?” The dark head and blond curls, side by side, studied their salads._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I see lettuce, lots of lettuce.” Rindy scrunched up her nose._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“And what animal eats lettuce?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Um, I saw a show where they fed manatees lettuce. They liked it and ate it right up.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Ok, so should we be manatees?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yes!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“There’s only one catch,” Therese said very seriously._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“What?” Rindy’s eyes got big._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“We are very civilized manatees and we eat with silverware!” She sat up a bit straighter and tugged on her collar, then picked up her fork._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Ok!” Rindy said excitedly as she picked up her fork and put on her best manatee face._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese laughed at her and copied her manatee face. She picked up her fork and took a bite, then looked at Carol. Her mouth was open a little, watching her child eat the lettuce of her salad._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________They ate their lettuce and were left with some carrots and tomatoes. They came up with bunnies for the carrots and racoons for the tomatoes. Then their salads were gone._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Mommy, can I have more salad?” Rindy asked._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________A very surprised Carol dished more salad for her daughter and Therese too. Then the game started over with different animals. Carol didn’t say anything out loud. She didn’t want to ruin the game or the fact that vegetables were being consumed by her child. She stretched her other leg out and ‘hugged’ Therese’s calf between her legs. Therese looked over and found Carol smiling at her. They stared at each other, both with silly grins on their faces. Carol mouthed “Thank you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese’s face lit up, her dimples deep in her cheeks and her eyes radiating happiness._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“You guys are doing it again. What animal stares at another animal? Because you guys are those animals. Yuck.” Rindy put her hands over her eyes and shook her head dramatically._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Carol chuckled, thinking this was Rindy’s version of ‘get a room’. _Hmmm, now there’s an idea. _She colored at her thought and Rindy’s complaint. She winked at Therese. They both laughed.__

________Antonio cleared their salad plates and went back to get their meals: spaghetti and meatballs for Rindy and Therese, chicken parm for Carol. Therese tucked her napkin in her shirt and picked up her fork and spoon. Carol watched Rindy tuck her own napkin in her shirt, copying her new friend._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Why do you need a spoon?” Rindy asked Therese._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I use it to wind the pasta around my fork.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“You do? How? Mommy usually cuts mine up.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese took her spoon in one hand and her fork in the other. She picked up a few pasta strands and spun the fork in her spoon, making a nice bite for herself. She showed it to Rindy and put the bite in her mouth._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I want to try,” Rindy said, picking up her spoon too._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese looked over at Carol._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“She’s all yours now.” Carol laughed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Ok, Rindy, pick up a few noodles on your fork. Oh, not quite so many, good. Now spin, ugh!” Sauce flinging in all directions. “Slowly!” she laughed, wiping her face, then Rindy’s. “Ok, give it another try, remember to spin slowly!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Rindy picked up three noodles and spun her fork slowly, her tongue poking out of her mouth in deep concentration. When she tried to pick up her fork, the noodles slipped off. She tried again, and the noodles slipped off. The third time was the charm and she managed to get the noodle ball on her fork into her mouth._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yes!” they all cheered._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“What about the meatballs?” Rindy asked._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Would you like me to cut them up for you, like mine?” Therese asked her little copycat._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yes, please.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese cut up Rindy’s meatballs and watched her take a bite then go back to spinning her noodles._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“She’s getting pretty good at it now,” Carol said proudly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“She is!” Therese exclaimed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________They reached for the bread at the same time, their hands tangling over the basket. Carol squeezed her hand and moved their joined fingers to the table. Therese blushed, but didn’t remove her hand, the bread forgotten._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I don’t know how you do it,” Carol said incredulously._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Do what?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“You got her to eat her salad, and now she’s spinning her noodles quite happily. You’re so good with her.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I like her. Very much.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Do you have younger brothers and sisters?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Um, no. I grew up in foster homes, so I moved around a lot. There were quite a few kids younger than me in the homes.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol didn’t know what to say. “What happened to your parents? If I may ask.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“My father died when I was six. My mother tried for a while, but she didn’t have the best taste in men and ultimately I was a burden, so she gave me up to Child Protective Services.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I’m sorry.” She wanted to reach across the table and hug the smaller woman, but all she could do was bring her other hand to the table and hold Therese’s fingers between both of her hands. She squeezed her hand and set their joined hands back on the table._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Gross,” Rindy said._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol and Therese laughed. Reluctantly, they let their hands separate. Their eyes still found each other, but tried not to stare. They finished their meal, Carol paid, and the three made their way out of the restaurant. Eleanora giving them all big hugs, Therese included. Antonio thanked them and the threesome made their way onto the street._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Rindy yawned. Carol looked at Therese and she took her hand. “Can we give you a ride home? Please? My car is parked just down this block.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I just live a …” Carol’s smile started to fall from her face as Therese spoke. “Um, I mean, ok.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol’s smile was brilliant._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Can you take this?” She handed her the bag with the boat in it. She picked up her sleepy daughter. RIndy wrapped her arms around her mother’s neck and her legs around her hips._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Give me your purse too,” Therese said, reaching for the strap over Carol’s shoulder._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol let it slide off her arm. She then used both her hands under Rindy’s bottom to support her weight._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“She’s getting too big to be carried,” Carol said._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“How old is she?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Five and a half. She’s a little small for her age.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“She’s adorable. I had fun with her. Thank you for dinner.” She ran her hand over Carol’s shoulder._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol felt little shocks from her shoulder down her spine from Therese’s touch. “It was my pleasure. I had fun watching the two of you little ‘Manatees’ eating your lettuce. That really was an incredible feat you performed,” she chuckled, smiling over at Therese._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“It was nothing.” Therese blushed. “And who are you calling little?” she teased the taller woman. They both laughed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“This is us.” Carol stopped at a black SUV parked along the curb. “Can you dig out the keys for me?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese fished around in Carol's purse, trying not to pay too much attention to the personal contents in her bag. She found her keys and hit the unlock button on the key fob._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“One more time,” Carol whispered. She noticed Rindy had fallen asleep and was trying not to wake her. Once the car was open, she carefully slid Rindy into her car seat and buckled her in. She closed Rindy’s door and opened the passenger side, then cleared the seat for Therese._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“There you go.” Carol gestured toward the seat. She took her purse and the boat bag from the smaller woman. She opened the back and deposited the boat in the back and then her purse behind the driver's seat. She locked the doors, but didn’t start the car right away. She took Therese’s hand in hers and ran her thumb across her knuckles._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Can we stay here for a while? Get to know each other a bit? I’m afraid my daughter monopolized all of your attention at dinner.” She smiled nervously at her passenger._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I’d like that,” Therese replied, turning in her seat toward Carol._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________They talked and laughed quietly for hours. Their bodies had slowly moved closer to the center console, both leaning toward the other, their shoulders touching, still holding hands. Neither one realized how much time had passed. Carol looked at her watch when she noticed the lights of a nearby restaurant turning off and a man putting the closed sign in the window._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“It’s ten o’clock,” she turned her head and whispered in Therese’s ear._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________A chill went down Therese’s spine and her breath caught. She squeezed Carol’s hand. “How did that happen? Didn’t we get in the car around seven?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I think so,” Carol said quietly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Therese ...”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Carol …”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________They both said at the same time._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“You first,” Therese said._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“No, you go first darling.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Carol, could we do this again? Just the two of us? I adore Rindy, but I’d like to share a meal, hold hands, stare at your beautiful face and get lost in your gorgeous blue eyes without being called out on it.” She laughed nervously._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I was going to ask you the same thing.” Carol smiled. She lifted her hand and ran her fingers over Therese’s cheek. “You are breathtaking,” she whispered. Therese closed her eyes, smiling at the contact and leaning into Carol’s touch._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________They exchanged numbers and decided on dinner the day after next. Carol started the car and pulled out onto the street. She followed Therese’s directions and parked in the loading zone in front of her building. It was quiet and no one was on the street. There was an awkward pause between them, and Therese finally opened her door to get out._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I’ll text you with a time and place tomorrow. Is that ok?” Carol asked._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yes, perfect.” Therese started to get out of the car, but turned back to the woman inside. “Carol, um …”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yes, darling?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Um … nothing. I’ll see you soon.” She smiled nervously. She got out and shut the door, then put her camera strap and purse over her shoulder, and walked toward the front door._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Therese?” Carol called to her from the sidewalk near the front of her car._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese turned around and said, “Yes?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Can you come back here for a minute? I don’t want to leave Rindy.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Therese walked slowly back toward the car and to Carol. She stopped just a few feet away from the tall blond, looking up into her eyes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Closer,” Carol said. Therese took a step closer. “Closer,” Carol repeated. Therese took another step closer. She was now within a foot of her. “Closer,” Carol whispered. Therese took a step closer, their bodies now against each other. Carol lifted her arms and threaded her fingers in Therese’s thick dark hair at the nape of her neck. She gently caressed her jaw with her thumbs. Therese felt goosebumps line her arms as she took a shuddering breath. She wrapped her arms around Carol’s thin waist and pulled them closer still. Each inhale and exhale made them very aware of their breasts and stomachs against one another. They stayed like that for a while, just staring into each other's eyes. Carol gently rubbed her nose back and forth with Therese’s. A little moan escaped Therese’s throat._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol said quietly, “ I can’t wait two days.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Me either,” Therese said breathlessly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Then it happened, there on the sidewalk, under a street light. Their lips touched. Slow and sweet, then a little more intense. Carol moved one of her arms around Therese’s shoulders and pulled them closer. Both women enjoyed the softness of the other, the give and take of their kisses spurring on their desire._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yuck!” A little voice could be heard from the car._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol pulled away from the kiss, and put her forehead on Therese’s. Both women chuckled at Rindy’s assessment of their kiss. Carol ran her hands down over the smaller woman’s shoulders and down her arms and squeezed her hands. “Two days. I’ll see you in two days. Alone.” She kissed her again, then stepped away._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Not soon enough,” Therese said as they parted, their hands holding until the distance became too great._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Carol got back in the car and started the engine. She waved to Therese as she pulled out. Therese held her hand in the air until she couldn’t see the SUV anymore. She wrapped her arms around herself and walked toward her building. The echo of Carol’s touch was still on her body._ _______

_Two days, forty eight hours, two thousand eight hundred and eighty minutes, one hundred seventy two thousand eight hundred seconds. But who’s counting? _Therese smiled to herself and went inside.__


	2. Reverberation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!

**Reverberation:** The persistence of sound in an enclosed or partially enclosed space after the source of sound has stopped; by extension, in some contexts, the sound that so persists

Carol pulled away from the curb. She could see Therese in her rearview mirror, still on the sidewalk, watching her leave. She wished she could pull over and go back to her, take her in her arms and just hold her close. What she wouldn't give right now to feel Therese’s arms around her.

 _I can still feel the imprint of her body against mine. We fit perfectly together, her breathing against me was so, so … hypnotic and arousing at the same time. Her lips were soft and sweet. Her hair smelled like rain on a spring day. I could stare into those sparkling emerald eyes for all eternity. She was so sweet to my little girl too. Ugh! Therese has reduced me to a hopeful, romantic sap! The next two days are going to be miserable. I already want to see her again, and I’ve just left her! I guess I’ll need to thank that damn swan next time I see him._ She chuckled to herself.

“Mommy?” Rindy said sleepily from the backseat.

“Yes, honey?”

“Why were you kissing Therese?”

 _Oh boy, how do I answer this question? I don’t want to lie to her, but I’m not sure she will understand the truth either. Will she tell her father? That’s a whole other can of worms._ Carol sighed. _He’s got a girlfriend, why can’t I have one too?_ She grinned at her last thought.

“Mommy?”

“Oh, sorry honey. Um … well … I like Therese very much.”

_Will that do? Maybe she’ll go back to sleep and that will give me some time to …_

“You like Aunt Abby, but you don’t kiss her like that.”

 _Shit. I should’ve known she wouldn’t let me off that easy! She’s my child, after all. Not to mention the fact that I have kissed Abby like that – well, not quite like that! Holy hell, what a kiss that was! I hadn’t planned on kissing her, but when she was so close I just couldn’t stop myself._ She felt warm just thinking about it. She looked at Rindy in her mirror. _Damn, still awake._

“Well, sweet pea, we like different people in different ways. You’re right, I do like Aunt Abby, but grown ups, um …” 

_Shit. Shit. Shit. Think Carol, think!_

“Um … well … grown ups sometimes, if they find a very special person, they might share a kiss like that, or a hug with that person, if they feel … if they really, really like that person.” _Please let that be enough …_

“Since she was kissing you back, does that mean that Therese really, really likes you too?”

“I suppose it does. Is that ok?” _Please, please, please say yes, because I really, really like her._

“I guess so. I like her too. Will we see her again?”

“I think so. I’m going to have dinner with her the day after tomorrow.”

“But won’t I be with Daddy? What if she wants to color or play her animal game?”

_She is killing me. I mean why in the world would Therese want to see me without her? So cute! Five year old logic at its best!_

She smiled at her daughter in the rearview mirror. “Yes, honey. You’ll be with Daddy. I suppose we’ll just have to manage until you can come out with us again.”

“Ok.” Rindy yawned. “Are we almost home?”

“Yes, snowflake. You’ll be snug in your bed in ten minutes,” Carol said, but Rindy had already fallen asleep again.

* * *

Therese stepped inside the door of her small apartment and turned on the light switch by the door. The lamp at the end of the couch came on and lit up the small room. She put her purse and camera on her coffee table. She tossed her sweater over the living room chair and wrapped herself in the blanket she kept there. She spun around and dropped onto the couch. She brought her fingers to her lips, where she could still feel Carol’s kiss on them. She smiled and closed her eyes, reliving it all again in her mind. She could still feel Carol’s fingers in her hair and her arm around her shoulders pulling her closer. “Closer,” Carol had said to her, and she had indeed moved closer, so close she could feel Carol breathing, feel her warm body against her own. The faint feeling of her was still on her skin, her lips, her hands. She took a deep breath. She swore she could smell just a hint of Carol’s perfume, she could still hear the deep vibration of her voice in her ears, taste the sweetness of her kiss. It was as if an echo of Carol still reverberated over all of her senses.

 _How am I going to wait two days? When is too soon to text or call? I haven’t dated much since … well …_ She quickly put that aside, not wanting to ruin her evening with Carol. _What are the rules for texting or calling? How long did one need to wait? Are we just friends? Well, friends don't kiss friends like I kissed Carol tonight. I guess I can report back to Dannie that I have indeed become more interested in “humans”. One in particular._ She giggled to herself. 

_Rindy is cute too. She looks a lot like her Mama, same blue eyes, nose, blond hair, and slim build._ “Yuck,” she said out loud and laughed. _She really fell for that old animal vegetable game. I had fun playing with her. I would really enjoy spending some more time with her._

Her phone chirped in her purse, pulling her from her musings. She sat up and dug it out of her purse. Maybe it was Dannie. Looking at the phone, she wasn’t sure she was actually seeing the name correctly. She closed her eyes and looked again. It was from Carol!

_I just wanted to say thank you for a wonderful night.  
Is it too soon/late to text? -C_

Therese was grinning from ear to ear as she answered.

_I had the same question.  
I should be thanking you. -T_

Carol had just gotten Rindy settled in bed, when she heard her phone vibrate. She picked it up and bit her bottom lip and smiled as she typed.

_Great minds. ;-) -C_

_Is Rindy asleep? -T_

_Yes. I’m sure she sends a “Yuck” re our texting. Lol.  
Sorry about all of that, it’s her favorite word right now. -C_

_It’s adorable. Well, except that last one. ;-) -T_

_Agreed. I could have done without that last one. -C_

_Me too. Wish we were “closer” right now. -T_

Therese hesitated before she hit send. Was she being too honest? She closed her eyes and hit send. She waited for what seemed like an hour, but it was just a couple of minutes before Carol responded. She eased her grip on her phone, not realizing she’d been holding on to it so tightly. She read Carol’s text again.

_Me too. xo -C_

Carol’s finger hovered over the send button. She read Therese’s message again, was “xo” too much? She hit send. “Closer” – she wanted that too.

Therese read the “xo” again and again, then responded.

_44 hrs. Goodnight. <3 -T_

_43.75 hrs. Sweet dreams. xo -C_

Therese set her phone on the coffee table. She would’ve liked to talk with Carol more, but thought it best to try and get some sleep. She was scheduled for a long day of work tomorrow. She picked up her camera and turned it on. She looked through the pictures she had taken in the park. She finally got to one of Carol. She ran her finger over the display. She had managed to capture a shot of Carol’s profile. She must have been looking at the swans eating the popcorn. The low rays of the sun lit her face perfectly, as if only the purest light was focused on her flawless skin. She had a hint of a smile on her face and her chin was tilted down slightly. Her hand was tucking a few loose strands of hair behind her ear. They must have escaped her ponytail in the swan battle. Her sunglasses hid her eyes, but Therese could never forget Carol’s eyes.

Therese thought about the photo. A point in time in the past, when neither one had known where the evening would take them. They didn’t even know each other’s names when the shutter had captured the image. She had thought Carol beautiful from the first moment she saw her, but when she looked into her eyes, she couldn’t look away. The display timed out and turned off. She turned it back on. When it went black again, she took the camera to her bedroom and put it on her bedside table, then got ready for bed. 

As she brushed her teeth, she remembered the moment she knew there might be more between them than a simple thank you dinner. When their ankles touched under at table she wondered, but when their eyes found each other and Carol moved her leg forward, she knew there could be more. It was sometimes hard to tell if it was only her feeling the attraction, especially with another woman. Her ‘gaydar’ wasn’t very good. She had only had one very short relationship with another woman, and she had been badly hurt. The brief time they shared, well the happier time, was enough for her to know she wanted that again. Could she have that with Carol?

She got into bed and turned off the light. She reached out and turned on the camera display. The picture of Carol was still on the display. The light coming from the display lit Therese’s face; she could see her own reflection ghosting over Carol’s image, like they were looking at each other. She smiled as she studied the detail of the blond woman’s face, her hand, and her mouth turned up at the corner. The display timed out and turned off. She turned it back on. This happened a few more times until she finally fell asleep.

* * *

Across town, Carol slid under the covers in the darkness of her bedroom. It was late, but she had no idea how she would ever get to sleep. Her mind was on a certain dark haired beauty. She wished she could see her tomorrow. She mentally went over her day. Was there any time she might be able to see her? If she were available, of course. Lunch? Coffee? No, she didn’t see any free time in her schedule. Surely, there would be some time to call her and hear her voice?

She had to drop Rindy at her grandparent’s house for the night, get her hair cut and nails done, so she would be ready to attend an event with Harge. She hadn’t wanted to, but he had talked her into it. Guilted her into it was more like it. Investors from L.A. and London were in town and he wanted to impress them with the facade he projected -- a family man with the ‘perfect’ wife and child. It was a high profile black tie event, and he knew his partners always enjoyed seeing Carol. 

She hated attending these things with him. His partners and their associates were all old rich men. Their wives were mostly young, beautiful, vapid trophies. There were a few exceptions, but not many. The men usually smelled of too much alcohol, always trying to put their hands on her; inappropriate hugs with hands wandering where they shouldn’t, trying to kiss her cheek, hand, or the absolute worst, her lips. What gave them the right? Harge was always conveniently unaware of their advances. She had half a mind to cancel. He hadn’t told his business partners about their impending divorce yet. He promised he would tell them after tomorrow night. He had made the same empty promise before. She didn’t know what the big deal was, she was pretty sure they all knew about his mistress, what difference did it make. He should just take her.

Wasn’t it just her luck to meet Therese now. Her life was a mess. They had spent hours in the car talking and laughing. She had been in the moment, completely immersed in their conversation, in the softness of her hands, in the depth and intelligence she saw in her big green eyes. They had talked about art, theatre, architecture, photography, climate change, wild places and foreign lands they wanted to visit. When they held each other on the sidewalk, it had felt honest, like Therese was holding the real woman she hid from everyone except Rindy and Abby. She had felt calm and safe. She hadn’t felt that way in a very long time, if ever.

They never discussed husbands, almost ex husbands she corrected herself, boyfriends, or girlfriends. Did Therese have anyone in her life? Was she free? Was Carol free? She was emotionally and physically free – she even had her own apartment, but technically she was still tangled with Harge. Why did it have to be so complicated? Was her timing always going to suck? She felt the tears falling down her cheeks. She wiped her eyes with her hands, turned over and punched her pillow several times. Would Therese understand her situation and still give her a chance? Give her some time to figure it all out? She hoped so, because she really, really liked Therese.


	3. Gain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!  
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...

**Gain:** To increase in level. The function of a volume control.

Carol had tossed and turned for hours – she couldn’t get Therese off her mind. Around one she’d gotten up, checked on Rindy, then gone out on the balcony for a cigarette. She had tried to push her situation with Harge out of her mind. She would much rather think about the young woman that made her heart flutter.

She knew she shouldn’t smoke and she didn’t very often. Her mother had been adamant she not smoke since she was a teen – continually citing how bad it was for her skin. She hadn’t cared much about Carol’s lungs, but her face was another thing. She had the thin figure, height, and face of a supermodel at age fourteen. Carol didn’t look like all the other girls; she was special. When she turned sixteen, they signed her first big modeling contract. 

Carol didn’t really want to model, but her mother insisted she had been born with the gift of beauty and she should take advantage of it. She had wanted to study Architecture, but her mother laughed at her when it came time to apply to the University. Modeling had been very lucrative though. She had invested quite a bit of the money she’d made, and still took jobs when a project or designer was of interest to her. She hadn’t worked full time for a few years. Modeling was a young woman’s game. Her age and her life had slowed her career, but she was currently ‘the face’ of a well known Italian design house and she still had some long term relationships with a few high profile fashion magazines. Her fame, opinions, and experience, had landed her a contributing editor spot for one of them.

She had finally drifted off around two a.m. Unfortunately, she would only get a few hours of sleep. Her alarm, a small curly haired blond, had woken her at six. She had pretended to still be asleep, but Rindy hadn’t believed it for a minute. After a good tickle fight and a lengthy snuggle, they got up and had breakfast. After their meal, Rindy took a bath and got dressed with a bit of Carol’s help. She was trying to do everything herself these days, so Carol ran her bath and sat with her coffee watching her daughter bathe. She helped her wash her hair and washed her back for her, but Rindy insisted on doing everything else. Once the little girl was dressed, she settled in on the couch to play her favorite game on Carol’s iPad. Since Rindy was occupied, Carol showered and got dressed. She chose jeans, a light weight cream colored sweater, a black blazer, and some low black boots. She had several appointments today, all to prepare for the event that evening, so she wanted to be comfortable while she ran around town.

Carol took a few minutes to go over her schedule for the day. _There has to be some time to at least call Therese. I just want to hear her voice._ It looked like she might have some time between getting her nails done and her haircut, or maybe between her haircut and four thirty, when her glam squad would show up at her apartment. They hadn’t talked about jobs the night before in the car, but she had to assume Therese worked. _Is it too early to text her?_ She looked at her watch. It was eight forty-five. She had to leave in fifteen minutes.

_Good morning. 34.25 hours. -C_

Carol sat on the couch next to Rindy watching her play her game. Her phone vibrated a couple of minutes later. Carol grinned.

_Morning. 34.25 hours too long. -T_

Therese was surprised by Carol’s text. She smiled and felt a flush over her cheeks. She turned her chair toward the wall and tried to hide her face from her colleague and best friend, Dannie. Their desks were along a long wall at the edge of a large bullpen. Dannie’s desk was butted up to hers, so they faced each other. The only thing separating them were their computer monitors.

_Am I interrupting your work? -C_

_No, been here for a few minutes. Start at 9. -T_

Rindy looked up at her mother. “Who are you talking to, Mommy?”

“Therese.”

“Can I talk to her?” Rindy asked.

“How about I tell her you say hello?” Carol kissed the top of her head.

“Ok.” She went back to playing her game.

_Rindy says hello. -C_

_So sweet, tell her I say Hi. -T_

“Therese says hi,” she said to Rindy. The little girl smiled, but didn’t look up, her attention fully on her game.

_Too soon to say I miss the sound of your voice? -C_

Therese laughed. _My voice?! I could listen to Carol’s deep voice for the rest of my days. She could just sit next to me and read the phonebook or anything else for all I care._ She loved hearing Carol say her name.

_Not too soon. I miss yours saying my name. -T_

Therese thought for a moment. Should she send that? Was it too much? _What the hell._ She hit send and thought for a moment, then decided to take it even farther with another text.

_I miss your hand in mine. -T_

Carol felt a smile come across her face. “Therese …” she said quietly. Rindy looked up at her like she had lost her mind, but quickly went back to her game. Carol remembered holding Therese’s hand in the car as they talked. They had held them palm to palm, comparing sizes. Carol’s fingers were much longer. Therese had traced the lines of her hand and laced their fingers together. They took turns running their thumbs over each other’s knuckles. Therese had held her hand in both of hers for a while.

_Me too. So much. I want to see you today. Any chance? -C_

Therese let out a little gasp and put one of her hands on her chest. Carol wanted to see her as badly as she wanted to see the tall blond. Dannie looked up at her.

“Therese? What’s going on over there? Something wrong?” he asked.

“No, no. Everything’s fine,” she replied as she typed and hit send to Carol.

_I want that too. I get lunch from 12:30 to 1:30. Can be flexible. -T_

Dannie looked around his monitor more closely at her. “Are you blushing?” He noticed she was focused on her phone. “Are you texting someone? Who?”

Therese wasn’t sure she wanted to tell him. He was her best friend, but she didn’t know where this thing with Carol was going. She didn’t want to include anyone beyond the two of them yet. Well, three if you count Rindy. She smiled, thinking of the little girl. She looked at Dannie. He’s such a good guy. She knew he would be happy for her, but she decided to play it down for now.

“Just a new friend I met in the park yesterday.”

“A new friend? That’s quite a smile and blush for a new _‘friend’_.” He air quoted with his fingers around friend.

Therese’s phone vibrated.

_Appt from 11-1’ish, Midtown. -C_

_I’m at the NYTimes Bldg. I could meet you. -T_

_Bryant Park, Fountain? 1pm? -C_

_Yes, Yes, Yes. -T_

_See you then. xo. -C_

Therese’s dimples were deep in her cheeks. Dannie gave her a knowing look.

“Friend, huh?”

“Yes,” Therese said, distracted by Carol’s ‘xo’. She responded to Carol with a heart.

_< 3 -T_

She was ridiculously excited that she would see Carol in just a few hours.

“Dannie?”

“Yeah?”

“Can you cover for me if I take lunch a little late?”

“Sure. I wanna know about this ‘friend’ though,” he answered.

“Ok. Just give me a little time.” She smiled at him, hoping he wouldn’t push her for more.

“Ok, when you’re ready. Maybe after lunch.” He winked at her.

Therese looked at him, her blush spreading to her ears now. Dannie noticed and laughed, then went back to work. She watched him for a minute and realized what a good friend he was to her. She knew he was just looking out for her. 

The rest of the morning crawled and she didn’t feel like she’d been very productive. Fortunately, she was caught up with her work. She had transferred the pictures she’d taken in the park to her phone and she couldn’t stop looking at them. The one of Carol brought on a feeling of tightness in her chest she’d never felt before. She turned off her phone and put it back in her purse. She needed to focus on work. _Fat chance of that!_ She sighed as thoughts of Carol continued to fill her head.

Carol’s heart warmed at Therese’s last text. It was so simple, just four characters, ‘<3 -T’, but they meant so much to her. She looked at her watch. _Shit! Ten minutes after nine, time to go!_ “Come on Snowflake, get your stuff. Let’s go.”

Carol had dropped Rindy with her grandparents. Harge’s mother greeted Carol with her usual cool reception. She had never liked her, never believed her good enough for her son. It had gotten worse since they’d told her they were divorcing. She didn’t want her as her daughter-in-law, but apparently being her ex-daughter-in-law was somehow worse. She would never understand this woman. She endured the required pleasantries, and then was on her way back to the city for her nail appointment.

Carol looked at her watch. Twelve forty-five. Her nails were almost done. She had asked them to hurry so she could meet Therese. _Damn it! I’m going to be late!_ She paid with her credit card, left a cash tip and ran out the door. She hailed a cab and got in when the first one stopped. She quickly texted Therese.

_Running ten minutes late. So sorry! -C_

_Here. Take your time. See you soon. -T_

Therese would wait for hours if need be. Her stomach growled. She was hungry.

_Grabbing a salad. Want one? -T_

_Yes! You’re a star. I’m starving! -C_

_Anything off limits? -T_

_No. Thank you, darling. -C_

Therese bought salads at a nearby deli and made her way back to the park. There were little metal tables and chairs around the fountain. Some people were leaving and offered their places to her. She set the salads on the table and heard the voice she so longed to hear.

“Therese!”

She turned and smiled. Her gaze found the beautiful blond heading toward her, her impossibly long legs almost at a run. _God, she looks good!_ Carol was within feet of her now.

“Carol,” she said.

They stood and looked at each other shyly, both smiling and shifting awkwardly. Therese held out her hand and Carol took it. Their uneasiness fell away the minute they touched. Their fingers laced together and they genuinely smiled at one another.

“Can I give you a hu ...?” Carol asked.

Therese dropped her hand and was in her arms before she could finish her question. She fed her arms under Carol’s blazer and around her waist, elbows bent, her hands flat against her upper back. One of Carol’s arms circled her shoulders, the other around her lower back. She drew the smaller woman even closer. Therese’s head was on her shoulder with her nose tucked into her neck. Carol kissed her temple and squeezed her tighter. She could swear she felt Therese kiss her. The hair at the back of her neck felt like it was standing on end from Therese’s soft lips on her skin. They stayed like that, soaking in each other’s warmth and closeness. They both pulled back, finding the others eyes, big smiles on their faces.

“Hi,” Carol said.

“Hi,” Therese answered.

“I missed you,” Carol confessed.

“Me too. I mean, I missed you too.”

“Should we sit and eat?”

“Oh! Yes, we should. I got you a cobb salad with balsamic dressing. Is that ok?” Therese asked.

“Perfect darling, just perfect. How much was it?” Carol said, reaching for her wallet.

Therese gently took Carol’s wrist in her hand, halting her attempt to get into her purse. “No, it’s on me. I want to treat you.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, it’s my pleasure.” Therese smiled, her dimples flashing at Carol.

“Thank you. I didn’t think I would get lunch today,” Carol said, staring at Therese’s smile.

They opened their salads. Therese handed Carol a fork and some napkins that she had tucked in her purse. They were quiet while they ate, mostly gazing into each other’s eyes.

“I’m so glad we could meet.” She took a bite of salad, then continued after she swallowed. “You said you were at the Times building. I assume you work there?” Carol asked.

“Yes. I’m a junior photographer. I did an internship when I was getting my Master’s, and they hired me when I graduated last summer.”

“What a great job! I’m impressed. Will you show me your work? I’d love to see it.”

“Sure. I took some pictures of you and Rindy yesterday. I should have asked, but I couldn’t resist.” Therese noticed Carol’s posture stiffen a little bit, then relax again. “Would you like to see them? I can send them to you if you like.”

Carol was quiet for a moment, then said, “Yes. Do you have them with you?”

Therese blushed. “Yes.” She picked up her phone and found the series of pictures, then handed it to Carol. “I’m sorry, I should have asked,” she repeated.

“No, no, it’s ok.” Carol felt bad; she didn’t mean to make Therese uncomfortable. She realized the young woman had no idea who she was, and how she tried to keep Rindy out of the public eye. Therese wasn’t paparazzi – she was just a photographer taking pictures of something she liked.

“These are beautiful, Therese. The light is perfect. I would love to have these.”

“Absolutely. Do you want me to delete them after I send them to you? You seem uncomfortable that I took them.”

“No, no, I was just being silly. They’re beautiful,” Carol answered and handed Therese her phone back and smiled at her. “Can you text me that one of Rindy with the swans in the background?”

“Sure.” Therese chose the picture and texted it to Carol.

They finished their salads and sat and looked at the fountain for a few minutes. Carol reached over and took Therese’s hand, moving her index finger over the pulse point in her wrist.

“Do you have time for a little walk?” Carol asked.

Therese looked at her phone. It was already one forty-five. “Yes, but I only have about ten more minutes.”

“I need to go too. I have a two o’clock hair appointment very close to here,” Carol answered.

They tossed their trash and held hands as they walked around the park. Pigeons ran in front of them, then scattered flying away. They sneaked looks at each other, much like they had the day before, only these were charged with longing. Both women moving closer to the other, until their arms were brushing against each other.

Carol looked around, then tugged Therese under a big tree. She took her into her arms and looked down at her. She lifted her hand and traced the fine features of her face with the tips of her fingers. Therese wrapped her arms around Carol; her hands now at the base of Carol’s back, gathering the soft material of her sweater in her fingers. She pulled their bodies together, eliminating any space that might have been left between them.

“You’re gorgeous,” Carol whispered.

“Can I kiss you?” Therese asked, her eyes shifting from the intense blue staring down at her and her enticing red lips.

“Yes,” Carol said breathlessly, almost a silent plea.

Their lips met, moving slowly together. Therese lifted her hand up, gently curling her fingers into Carol’s hair, pulling her closer with her other arm still around her waist. Carol’s hand had moved to her neck, her thumb caressing the soft skin under her ear. Therese felt shivers down her spine from Carol’s touch. She ran her tongue along Carol’s bottom lip. Carol opened to her and Therese ran the tip of her tongue along the inside of her upper lip, as she drew it into her mouth. 

Carol was lost in the tender softness of Therese. Her senses were overwhelmed; the taste of her mouth, the feel of her tongue on her lips, the sounds of their lips moving together and the passionate little moans escaping their throats as they kissed. The fresh scent of her shampoo filled her nose, mixed with a scent that must be Therese’s own, driving her wild. Their kisses were becoming more heated and Carol’s desire was escalating. She felt a little dizzy from the touch of this young woman in her arms.

“Therese …” she whispered against her lips. “We have to stop. You’ve set me on fire,” she said as she sucked in the smaller woman’s bottom lip between her own. She slowly let it go and softly kissed her lips, trying to pull herself away.

“Really? _I’ve_ set _you_ on fire?” She smiled against Carol’s lips. “I can barely stand, my knees are so weak,” Therese answered, kissing Carol’s jaw before pulling away a few inches to look into the hooded blue eyes staring back at her. They were both breathing heavily, each woman’s chest rising and falling almost in sync.

“How long until we see each other again?” Carol asked.

Therese looked at her phone. It was two o’clock. “Oh no, I’ve made you late for your appointment.”

“I don’t care. What about you? I’ve made you late getting back to work.”

“I don’t care either.” Therese smiled up at her. 

Carol noticed a softness to her eyes that wasn’t there before. “How long?”

“Thirty hours. One thousand eight hundred minutes. One hundred twenty-six thousand heart beats, give or take a few thousand.” Therese grinned up at Carol.

“Too long, too many ...” Carol answered, giving her one last kiss.

Carol gently pushed away from Therese, feeling like she’d stepped from a blazing inferno into an arctic freeze. She led Therese back onto the path.

“I really have to go,” Carol said sadly.

“I do too.”

“I’ll text you tomorrow with a place. You text me first, if you want to go somewhere in particular.” Carol took her into her arms for one last hug. “I’ll see you soon,” she whispered in Therese’s ear and then stepped away.

Therese squeezed her tightly and whispered back, “Soon,” before they separated. They backed away from each other, their eyes still locked, neither one wanting to look away. Carol lifted her hand and blew Therese a kiss, then turned and disappeared behind a group of people walking on the path.


	4. Distortion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!  
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...

**Distortion:** Anything that alters the musical signal. There are many forms of distortion, some of which are more audible than others.

Carol was fifteen minutes late to her hair appointment. Jade had been Carol’s hair stylist for years and knew her quite well, so her tardiness was almost expected. It didn’t really matter, as Carol had booked Jade for the entire afternoon to cut and style her hair for the event that night. She was coming to the apartment at four-thirty with the rest of the crew to help Carol get ready. They had decided last week that it would be easier to cut Carol’s hair at the salon.

Jade’s assistant took Carol’s blazer and offered her something to drink. Carol opted for some cold water. She sat down in Jade’s chair, a mirror in front and one on either side at wide angles. Jade’s assistant had a black drape and was about to put it around Carol.

“I’ve got it, thanks,” Jade said, taking the material. “Carolyn, are you sure you don’t want to change that sweater for a smock?”

“No, I’m going home when we’re done – it will be fine,” Carol replied.

“Ok,” Jade said, shaking the drape out in front of her client and bringing it up around her neck. Looking closer at Carol in the mirror, she said, “Carolyn, you look radiant! Where have you been?“ Jade made eye contact and gave Carol a quizzical look, clearly teasing her.

“What do you mean, ‘where have I been’?” Carol asked, a broad smile on her face.

Jade leaned in close to Carol’s ear and said quietly. “There is a lovely shade of pink lipstick on your collar, and it isn’t your color, dear.” She winked at her in the mirror.

Carol turned the color of the afore mentioned lipstick and was speechless.

“Your secret is safe with me,” the stylist leaned down and whispered, “but I want to hear about her soon.” Jade squeezed Carol’s shoulder and smiled at her in the mirror, then started running her fingers through Carol’s hair. “Ok, so what are we going to do for this shindig tonight?”

Carol was thankful Jade hadn’t teased her any further. She smiled back at her. She trusted Jade, but she hadn’t told anyone, not even Abby, that she was finally ready to take her life back. She just didn’t know how to do it yet. Meeting Therese had given her even more courage to figure it out. She really, really liked her. ‘Like’ wasn’t exactly the correct term. Just being with her, she didn’t even have to touch her, to feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Kissing her brought on an altogether different kind of warmth.

Carol thought back to how she had gotten to where she was now …

Six months ago, Harge had had too much to drink and had tried to get physical with her. He had decided she was still his wife and he should have her in his bed. A particularly heated argument followed when Carol wasn’t interested. He brought up her short affair with Abby and said some very ugly things about her sexuality. She had let anger get the better of her and said some nasty things about his ability to satisfy her in bed. Unfortunately, she had mentioned that she’d never had that problem with Abby. What had she been thinking, arguing with him about something so personal! 

He certainly had no ‘right’ to her body. Yes, they were still married as far as New York State was concerned, but it had been over shortly after Rindy was born. She had even moved out of their bedroom. He had ‘blackmailed’ her into staying in the marriage, threatening to out her privately and professionally if she filed for divorce. He promised her he would seek alimony and full custody of Rindy by proving her unfit. 

Over the last few months, she’d come to the realization that she needed to divorce Harge, and deal with whatever came of it. She had leased an apartment and moved out. She didn’t think he had a leg to stand on regarding custody of Rindy. Carol had filed for divorce that afternoon and asked her lawyer to help her with a temporary custody agreement until they could finalize one. Alimony was yet another thing, but it would be worth every penny to be free. She wasn’t too worried about acceptance from her family and close friends; Harge’s family would be a problem, and her work relationships could suffer immeasurably if she followed her heart.

During that same argument Harge had told her it would be the end of what was left of her faltering career. No one would want to work with her again if she was a lesbian. He even went so far as to say she wasn’t free to ‘choose that lifestyle’ by the contracts she was bound to currently. Choose?! Did he really think it was something that she could choose? Did he think that one day at the club, she stubbed out a cigarette and decided to chase skirts?! 

The man was infuriating! As big an ass as he could be, he could be right about the contracts. She didn’t know if any of them had hidden morality clauses — language that would prevent her from living openly. Her lawyers were looking into it.

“Carolyn?” Jade said. “You seem to be a million miles away. Are you all right, honey?”

“Oh, yes. I’m sorry. What did you ask?” Carol came back to the present.

“I said, what are we going to do with your hair for this shindig tonight?” Jade repeated.

“Oh, sorry. Have you seen the dress yet?” Carol asked.

“No. Tell me about it.”

“It’s a long, very form fitting, white, beaded Armani. It fastens around the neck, bare shoulders, low back, with a bit of a train. I like trains for the overall look, but they always get stepped on. The dress is lovely.”

“Sounds wonderful,” Jade agreed. “Should we just give your hair a bit of a trim? We can keep it shoulder length and style it in a full layered look, then sweep it back from your face a bit. Unless you were thinking of wearing it up?” Jade led her back to the sinks.

“No, I think down sounds good for tonight. I’m not wearing a lot of jewelry, just some nice diamond earrings and a ring or two, and maybe a bracelet. Not sure about it yet. It’s all on loan, so we’ll see what Jeanette comes up with this afternoon.”

Jade washed and conditioned Carol’s hair, then led her back to the chair. She trimmed the blond’s hair, put some product in it, and dried it using a large round brush. When she was done, Carol’s hair looked amazing.

“It looks great! As always, you are the best in the business!” Carol exclaimed. “So, I’ll see you at the apartment in an hour?”

“Yes. I’ll be there. We’ll make it look even better!”

“Thanks, Jade. I would look a fright without you.”

“Darlin’, you couldn’t look a fright if you tried!” She removed the drape, and her assistant helped her put her blazer back on.

“See you in a bit,” Carol said as she was leaving the salon.

She caught a cab and headed back to her apartment. She had forty-five minutes until the ‘glam squad’ showed up. She took off her clothes and put on her silk robe, then curled up on her bed. She drifted off rather quickly.

* * *

Therese had almost run back to work and was winded when she finally got back to her desk. She put her purse away and logged on to her computer. There was an email from her boss asking her to come see him as soon as she had a minute. She got up, and smoothed the non-existent wrinkles in her blouse and slacks with her hands. Her boss was in his office on the phone, leaning back with his feet on his desk. When he saw her he smiled, dropped his feet to the floor and held up one finger on his free hand. He motioned for her to sit down in his guest chair. She sat on the edge of the chair, wondering what he had called her in about this late in the afternoon.

He finally got off the phone and smiled at her. “Therese. Thanks for coming so quickly. I have a last minute assignment I’d like you to take.”

“Last minute assignment?” Therese asked.

“Yes, Jerry called in sick and I need one of my best photographers to cover a job tonight.”

“Tonight?”

“Yes, 7 pm, but you’ll need to get there by 6 to get a good spot. Are you up for it?”

“Of course! Tell me about it,” Therese said, eagerly. She hadn’t been sent anywhere on her own before.

Her boss gave her all the details, her press credentials, and told her to get going – she didn’t have a lot of time. She smiled and thanked him for the opportunity and went back to her desk.

She was packing up her things when Dannie sat back down at his desk.

“Where are you headed?”

“I got an assignment. Jerry called in sick,” she said, beaming.

“Yeah? That’s great, Therese! Not so great for Jerry, but you could use this to show off your mad skills behind the lens! What is it?”

She held up her credentials and smiled as she dangled them from the lanyard.

“Ooooh, swanky!” Dannie was impressed.

“I’ve got to go!” Therese said as she turned her computer off and grabbed her stuff. “Wish me luck?!”

“You don’t need luck, you’ve got talent. Go get ‘em tiger!” he said, genuinely excited for his friend.

* * *

Carol was dreaming a sweet dream of a special green eyed brunette when her phone woke her. It was one of the door staff letting her know Jade, Jeanette, and A.J. had arrived. Carol had let them know she was expecting the crew, and to send them up when they arrived.

She got up, washed her face, and opened the door to wait for them. She looked at the other three doors that opened into the foyer and wondered about her neighbors. She hadn’t met any of them yet. She heard a soft “ding” and the elevator doors opened. Her crew spilled out laughing about something they had heard regarding a young starlet and her rumored beau.

“Carolyn!” they all sang out in unison.

“It seems the party has started without me.” Carol smiled at them all. Hugs were shared all around, and they headed into her apartment.

“Oh honey, we would never start without you!” A.J. said.

“That poor girl, you know the one in those speedy car films, they say she is with that hunky dreamboat from the latest superhero movie,” Jeanette filled in.

“We all know she’s gay, but can’t come out. She’s only twenty-one, Just starting out, her career could be ruined,” A.J. lamented.

“I heard he’s gay too,” Jeanette said.

“He’s not gay; besides, what does it matter? Love is love. Let’s drop this – we have work to do,” Jade chided them. She winked at Carol conspiratorially.

Carol was grateful to Jade, but not entirely comfortable that she had probably figured out her secret. “Jeanette, should we start with showing everyone the dress and jewelry?” Carol said.

“Absolutely!” Jeanette smiled at the group.

Carol had a spare bedroom with an en suite that she had converted to an office slash dressing room. They used it to ‘glam’ her up when she had to attend these big events. Jeanette had dropped the dress by earlier that morning. She often left things for her to try on when she was out. She had a key to the apartment and would text when she was dropping stuff off. 

They usually had a couple of these things a month. Charity events, premiers, opening nights, etc. She didn’t always bring Jade and A.J. in; she could do her own hair and makeup some of the time. Jeanette was mostly tasked with finding her clothes, shoes, and accessories. She often arranged items from designers and jewelers that wanted Carol to be seen and photographed in their latest creations. She still had the figure and the face to make anything look good. Her fame still garnered the attention of the fashion world and celebrity rags when she chose to step into the limelight.

Carol had grown weary of her celebrity. Living in a ‘fishbowl’ was part of the deal, but when she’d had Rindy, she thought differently about it all. She was fiercely protective of the little girl, which seemed to make the paparazzi even more hungry for pictures of the child. She had even tried doing a couple of articles for entertainment magazines with pictures of them, hoping it would be enough. It was never enough. She finally had decided she would limit her own exposure, hoping interest in her would die down, which it had over the last few years.

“Carolyn? Are you joining us?” Jade asked her.

“Coming,” she replied as she walked down the hall toward the study.

Jade stayed back and gently took Carol’s elbow in her hand. “Carolyn? Are you ok dear? That’s the second time today you’ve zoned out on me.”

“Um … Yes, I’m fine. I just have a lot on my mind these days.”

Jade leaned in close, her back to the study a couple of doors down the hall, and said quietly, “I was serious in the salon, your secret is safe with me. I’ve been where you are, that is, if you’re where I think you are right now. Of course, I don’t have a public persona to worry about, but I do have a deeply conservative family in Georgia! Almost as bad.” She chuckled. “It will all work out. Trust me.” She squeezed her arm a little bit and smiled at her.

“Thanks, Jade. I’m not ready to …” Carol stammered.

“Darlin’, if she’s special, don’t lose her over this stuff. She’s real – the public is cruel and has a short attention span. No matter what you decide, your career will be ok. It may take a beating for a few months or a year, but things are changing. I’ve never seen you truly happy. I’d like to see that woman. I think I caught a glimpse of her this afternoon when you arrived at the salon.” Jade pulled her into a tight hug. “Now, let's go get you ready for tonight.” She took Carol’s hand and led her down the hallway.

* * *

Therese had gone home, showered and got dressed for the red carpet event she had been assigned to photograph that evening. She had only ever been to one before. Jerry had taken her to help him with his equipment. 

She looked at herself in the full length mirror on the back of her bedroom door. She looked pretty good. She wore a casual tux she had purchased at a consignment store for these kinds of assignments. She had paid the extra money to have the suit tailored to fit her small female figure, yet still be loose enough for her to move in as she did her job. Dresses just weren’t an option when on a photo call, she needed the freedom to bend, squat, run, whatever it took to get the shot. She wore it with a simple white button up shirt with a wide string tie. It had a button down collar and French cuffs. She had chosen some silver dime size cuff links with a fancy “T” on each one to fasten the sleeves. Her hair was back in a sleek ponytail and she put on a little more makeup than she usually wore. She was ready.

She arrived at the press check-in an hour early. Her camera equipment was heavy and she didn’t want to be late, so she had splurged on a cab. She showed her credentials and was admitted without question. She got lucky and found a spot along the rope line between two photographers that usually shot for Getty Images. They were very nice to her, crowding her a bit, but that was par for the course at a red carpet shoot. She checked her equipment again. Batteries charged, lenses cleaned, flashs on each camera. There were two cameras on straps around her neck. One slung to the side, the other in her hands. She was ready.

* * *

Harge picked Carol up in a limo in front of her building. He hadn’t even bothered to come up and get her. Her crew had done a marvelous job, and per normal, she looked stunning. Carolyn Ross was ready for the public, while Carol Aird was tucked away in the shadows. Jade helped her into the car, then handed her her coat and clutch.

“Mr. Aird,” she greeted him coolly. She didn’t care much for him.

“Jade,” Harge returned her greeting.

“Have a good time, Carolyn,” Jade said. “Remember dear, you’re always the most gorgeous one on the red carpet!”

“Thanks to you and the crew! Thank you again.” Carol fawned.

The driver shut the door and returned to the front.

“You look lovely, Carol,” Harge said, trying to take her hand.

“Give it a rest, Harge. This is the last time we attend one of these things as a _couple._ You promised.”

“I know,” he said as he turned his head to look out the passenger window.

Carol was dreading this event. She just had a feeling she shouldn’t be there. She would put on her covergirl smile and posture for the red carpet, endure the event, and go home and collapse. She didn’t have any others scheduled for weeks. She had planned on taking a long break to figure her life out. 

She thought about Therese. She couldn’t wait to see her tomorrow. She would have to explain all of this to her soon. If she wanted to see her romantically, which she did, she needed to be honest with her. Especially since the young woman seemed to have no idea who Carolyn Ross was, or had been. How refreshing to be able to be just Carol to someone. She would tell her tomorrow over dinner. 

How many hours was it now? She got out her phone and calculated twenty-four hours exactly. She decided to send her a text.

_Thank you for lunch, darling. I loved seeing you today. 24 hours. xo-C_

* * *

Therese felt her phone vibrate on her pocket. She took it out and saw the text from Carol. Her heart warmed and she took a moment to text her back.

_Me too. I can’t wait to be in your arms again. 24 hours. <3-T_

The first group of celebrities were headed her way. She put her phone back and looked down the carpet. Most of the attendees were business people — they didn’t typically walk the red carpet, with the the exception of a few billionaires and politicians. She wondered why celebs would want to attend this thing, _I guess charity events bring out all kinds._ She would need to brush up on her celeb identification skills if she were to be asked to cover any more of these things.

* * *

Carol looked at Therese’s text and smiled. God, she couldn’t wait either.

The car pulled up at the end of the red carpet. A tall bulky man in a tux opened the door and offered her his hand. She took it and gracefully got out of the car.

“Thank you,” she said to the man. He was mostly likely security, doubling as a greeter.

“Have a nice evening, Ms. Ross,” he said politely.

A young woman dressed in black introduced herself as Claire. She explained she was a PA for the event and would help her with anything she might need during her trip down the red carpet. It was a short run compared to most of these photo ops. Carol knew the drill, and was happy to have help. She always hired her own PA for the really big events. Claire would make sure everyone got what they needed. Photographers would get their pictures, and Carol would make it down the carpet in one piece as quickly as humanly possible. Harge would be there too, but he would be of no help. Claire offered to take Carol's coat and clutch for her, and gestured toward the photographers.

Carol could see and hear flashes and shutter clicks from the moment she exited the car. There was the standard set up, a wide red carpet, a large wall with the sponsor’s logos in a pattern along it on one side, and a rope with a zillion photographers on the other. She rarely could see them for all the flashes going off in her eyes. She wondered how she could see anything after a trip down one of these things. 

The first group of photographers were all very polite. They took pictures of Harge with Carol, then asked for Carol alone. Harge was reluctant to step aside, but Claire gently took his arm and led him to the side. 

“Ms. Ross, this way please.”

“To your right, Ms. Ross,” another would ask. 

“Can we see the back of your dress, Ms. Ross?”

“Over the shoulder, look this way please.”

* * *

Therese heard a huge flurry of motion and sound coming from down the carpet. She had no idea who the photographers were so excited about. She could just barely make out a tall blond getting out of a limo in a white dress that hugged every curve. She turned to one of the Getty guys next to her and asked, “Who’s coming? Why are they all so excited?”

“Carolyn Ross and her husband.”

“Who is she? Is her husband famous?” Therese asked, not recognizing the name.

“You don’t know who Carolyn Ross is?” he said, shocked.

“No,” Therese admitted.

“She’s one of the most beautiful models to have ever walked the runway. She’s been on all the covers; Vogue, Vanity Fair, Harper’s, Marie Claire, all the others like them. Carolyn’s still gorgeous, if you ask me. She has the perfect life. Fame, money, handsome husband, cutest little girl you’d ever see. Although, she doesn’t like us to take pics of her kid. I totally respect that about her.”

“Maybe I’ll recognize her when I see her,” Therese offered.

“I’m sure you will. She hasn’t been working a lot in the last few years, but I think it must be her choice. She is a knockout. I think more beautiful now than ever.”

“Thanks for the info,” Therese said.

“No problem, kid. Here she comes!” He picked up his camera and shouted, “Ms. Ross! Ms. Ross!” He then leaned over to Therese, “Look at her! Was I right? Gorgeous!”

Therese picked up her camera, turned and looked down the carpet. She let her camera drop and hang from the strap around her neck, still holding it with her hands. She needed to see the woman walking toward her with her eyes first, not through her lens. The young photographer was stunned at what she saw before her. It was Carol on the arm of a tall, dark haired man. The Getty guy’s words came back to her, ‘handsome husband, cutest little girl...’. She felt sick, her stomach in her throat. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. Surely it must just be someone that looked like Carol. It couldn’t be her Carol. She dutifully took pictures of her; front, side, back, with her husband, but most of the shots without him.

This woman moved like Carol, she looked like Carol, she had to be Carol, but Carolyn Ross didn’t match Carol Aird. She was confused and hurt. Then a photographer yelled out, “How’s Rindy, Carolyn?” Carol got a stern look on her face and ignored the question. Another photog yelled out, “Mr. Aird, can you step aside, please. Can we have Ms. Ross by herself.” Then the cacophony of yelling, shutter clicks and flashes overwhelmed her. She sat down on her knees for a moment trying to find some balance, something that made sense. This was clearly her Carol. She was married? A celebrity? Carolyn Ross?

Her Carol?

* * *

Carol thought she saw a photographer sit down behind the ropes. That’s odd. She held her hand up to shield her eyes from the flashes. It was a small, dark haired woman … the build was right, and the features she could just barely make out seemed right. 

_Could it be? No! Please god, no. Not like this, she can’t find out like this ..._

Carol motioned for Claire to come to her, which she did right away.

“Claire, that photographer, there, sitting on the ground behind the ropes. Could you make sure she’s all right and see who she is? Ask her if she’ll come talk with me when we are finished?”

“Of course, Ms. Ross.”

Claire walked over to the young woman and knelt down. Carol saw her put her hand on the woman’s shoulder. The young photographer wiped her eyes with her sleeve and shook her head _no_ , then held her hand up to Claire. A clear dismissal.

Carol's legs were weak, her ears were ringing and she felt dizzy, suddenly exhausted. Her head was swimming with dread. She knew it was Therese. She knew it ...


	5. Block

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!  
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...

**Block:** Building a continuous barrier that traps or stops air movement from one side of a partition to the other, greatly reducing airborne sound transmission.

Carol was weak in the knees, her ears ringing. She felt dizzy; suddenly exhausted. Her head was swimming with dread. She knew it was Therese. She knew it … She took a step back and lifted her arm, looking for anything to steady her weak body. Her hand found the sponsor wall. Her eyes were focused on the spinning red carpet at her feet. There was a brief pause in the flashing. The photographers were stunned. Carol looked over to where Therese had been, a pair of anguished, watery green eyes met her pained and sickened blue gaze. She could see the hurt and sadness in just the split second before the photographers started snapping their pictures again. Like sharks, they had smelled the blood in the water, all wanting their piece of Carolyn’s flesh.The frenzy of movement, sound, and flashing light were all making her feel worse. Then they started yelling at her. She couldn’t understand any of their words, all shouting at the same time.

Harge rushed over to her. “Carol, what’s wrong?” he asked, offering her his arm.

“Nothing, leave me alone,” she said toward the sponsor wall.

Claire noticed Carolyn leaning against the wall and rushed from the ailing photographer to her charge as quickly as she could, trying not to draw too much attention to herself.

“Ms. Ross, is there anything I can do for you?”

“Yes.” Carol took her arm for a moment. She turned her head once again toward the wall and asked, “I need you to get me to the end of this carpet as quickly as you can, and I need a private place for a few minutes when we are done.”

“Absolutely, Ms. Ross. I can take care of that immediately,” Claire said, and picked up her phone and hit her favorites. “Are you able to continue?”

“Yes.” Carol let go of Claire’s arm and forced herself to stand up straight. She had to look as if nothing was wrong. Even though everything was wrong. “I’m fine,” she said to Claire, not only to ease her worry, but to try and convince herself as well. She turned toward the photographers with her perfect posture and covergirl smile back in place.

“Carol?” Harge looked concerned, questioning if she was ok in the way he said her name.

“I’m fine,” she said, taking his arm and moving down the carpet to the next group of photographers. She looked back, trying to find Therese behind the ropes, but was blinded by all the flash.

* * *

Therese watched as the color drained from Carol’s face. She saw her stumble and put her hand on the wall behind her. There was a pause in the flashing. Carol looked right at her. She could see the agony in her eyes through her own tears. She was even more confused now. The sincerity and longing in her gaze struck her heart. God, she felt it too. The pain of discovery. She watched as her husband rushed to her. She saw Carol dismiss him, but take the arm of the woman that had just been talking to her, making sure she was ok. They weren’t facing her anymore – they were talking with their faces directed toward the wall. What were they talking about? She saw the young woman nod a couple of times, and make a phone call. Therese watched as Carol slowly straightened her back, again at her full height, her head held high. Then she gracefully turned back to the rope line, her beautiful smile ready for the photographers once again. She saw her look back in her direction, but then continue down the carpet away from her, her hand on the elbow of her husband’s arm.

Therese wiped her tears with her sleeve and stood back up. She would be damned if she let this ruin the chance her boss had taken on her. He had given her this assignment, and she would finish it. As luck would have it, Carol was one of the last celebs to walk. She had gotten the shots she needed and was packing up when she felt her phone drop. As she was leaning over to get it, she saw Carol’s name and a picture of her and Rindy from the park come up on the screen.

Before she could pick it up, the Getty guy next to her had it in his hand. Panic gripped her as he looked at her phone. She didn’t want him to see the caller I.D.

“Wow kid, that’s a great shot of Carolyn and her kid! Who took it?” he asked, completely distracted by the image, not realizing it was an incoming call.

“Can I please have my phone back?” She held out her hand. He handed it back and she hit ‘decline’, not accepting the phone call. She quickly shoved the phone back in her pocket.

“Come on? Who took it?” the Getty guy asked again.

“I did.” Therese felt her phone vibrate. Digging it out of her pocket, she could see Carol had left a message. She quickly shoved it back in her pocket.

“I thought you said you didn’t know anything about Carolyn Ross?” he asked, clearly confused.

“I don’t,” Therese said, a tear fell down her cheek. She’d been trying not to cry anymore. She was a professional, damn it. She quickly wiped it away with her hand.

“You could sell that for a fortune,” he offered. “Are there more?”

“No, there aren’t any more,” Therese said, trying to sound convincing. “Thanks for your help tonight,” she said to him as she turned to leave.

“Wait a minute,” he said as he handed her his card. “If you want to sell that, or others, give me a call.”

“I won’t, and I told you, there aren’t any others.”

He tilted his head. “Any photographer worth their salt couldn’t take just one shot of those two.” He put his big hand on her shoulder. “Take care, kid.”

* * *

Claire led Carol to a small dressing room near the ballroom. Harge had gone ahead to meet his business partners at their table.

“Is there anything else I can help you with, Ms. Ross?” Claire asked.

“No, thank you, and please, call me Carolyn. I trust all this will be kept between us?”

“Absolutely. I take my job very seriously, and I understand your need for privacy,” she answered. She handed her a card and said, “Feel free to use this room as long as you like. This is my cell number, if you need anything more this evening Ms. Ro … I mean Carolyn.” She smiled.

“Thank you, Claire. You’ve been a big help.”

Claire quietly shut the door behind herself, leaving Carol alone. She opened her clutch, got her phone and called Therese. No answer. She left a message. “Therese. I’m so, so sorry. This was the worst way possible for you to find out about Carolyn Ross. I was going to tell you tomorrow night. I just … well … I didn’t realize you had no idea I was Carolyn Ross, not until yesterday at lunch. It was so nice being just Carol to someone for a little while. Someone extraordinary like you.” She paused, thinking if she should say more. “Please call me back.” Another longer pause. “I miss you,” she said quietly, then hung up.

As she ended the call, a wave of nausea hit her stomach. How would she get through this night? She sat for a little while longer, looking at her phone. Turning it on, and then off, then on again. Hoping Therese would call her back. She tried taking deep breaths, in through her nose and out through her mouth. None of it helped. She needed to calm herself if she were going to face the rest of this damn dinner and Harge’s partners. She kept remembering the hurt in Therese’s eyes. She really wanted to go home.

* * *

Therese walked a few blocks away from the venue and caught a cab. She sat in the back feeling sorry for herself. She listened to Carol’s message twice. She wanted to call her back; she said she was extraordinary. Which almost got her, but calling her back, seeing her, to what end? She was married. She was a celebrity. How could she have let herself fall so hard, so quickly, for someone she’d just met. She didn’t know anything about her. She had a child, she made her laugh, she loved talking with her, she was gorgeous, being held in her arms was a dream, and kissing her was …

“Ma’am?” The cabbie interrupted her thoughts.

“Oh, sorry.” She paid him and got out. She stood there for a minute looking at the sidewalk and the lamppost in front of her building. She remembered their first kiss. She remembered Carol’s fingers in her hair, then her arms around her, her nose gently rubbing back and forth on her nose, then her lips on hers. “Closer,” she said out loud, her fingers grazing her lips as she thought of Carol. She felt her skin tingle, and she longed to go back to yesterday, to being held in Carol’s arms and to kiss her again. Her chest filled with pain as she sighed deeply. She allowed herself to stand there a little bit longer, then turned and went up to her apartment.

Therese took off her coat and tossed it on the couch. She saw the sweater she had been wearing yesterday. She picked it up and inhaled Carol’s perfume. It was faint, but it was there. God, she smelled good. 

She felt her phone vibrate. She dug it out of her pocket.

Therese, please talk to me. I can explain everything. -C

Therese tossed her phone on the couch, as much to punish Carol as it was to keep herself from answering. She picked up her coat and went in her bedroom to take off her tux and hang up everything. Feeling a little better after a hot shower, she thought she should probably answer Carol’s text, but just couldn’t bring herself to do it. She felt the tears start to fall again. What would she say? 

How could she have let herself get so enamored with a woman she barely knew? There had been no wedding ring. She had checked. There was no real indication of any kind that would make her think Carol wasn’t a normal, maybe professional, probably divorced, single mom. Sure, it was obvious she wasn’t hurting for money, but she didn’t seem overly wealthy either. She knew nothing of Carolyn Ross. She thought back, and no, she couldn’t think of anything that would have given her a clue. Maybe if she’d been up on fashion and magazines, but none of that stuff really interested her. She wiped her tears with her pillowcase and fell into a fitful sleep.

* * *

Carol realized Therese wasn’t going to call her back anytime soon. She went to the mirror and pulled herself together, checked her makeup and hair, then went out to join the table. God, this night felt endless already.

Harge stood when he saw her approach. He pulled out her chair and slid it back in once she was seated.

“Feeling better?” he asked.

“No, not really.”

“Do you think you can make it through dinner?”

She was surprised; he actually seemed concerned. “Yes, I’ll try.”

“That’s all I can ask.”

Boy, he was laying on the charm tonight. Ugh. She turned away from him to find one of his partners. Mr. Bradley had already had a few drinks and was more than happy to see her. He put arm around her and kissed her cheek, fawning praises on her and her wonderful husband. He was from L.A. and must have been a million years old. He moved his hand under the table and set it on her thigh. Carol moved it away, but he put his hand back. She shifted in her seat away from him, but his hand moved with her. Gently, she pushed it away again, and excused herself, claiming she needed to visit the ladies room. She got up and walked out of the ballroom and into the women’s restroom. There was only one other person there, and she was on her way out. She held the door open for Carol.

“You look lovely,” the woman said, recognizing her and blushing.

“Thanks, so do you.” Carol smiled. 

Thank god no one else was in there. She sat down on the couch in the lounge and texted Therese. She waited for a few minutes to see if she would respond, but there was nothing. Her phone felt like a twenty pound anchor in her purse. She wished Therese would answer her with something. Anything at all. Even if she yelled at her, that would be better than this agonizing silence.

When Carol returned to the table, Harge stood and held her chair for her again. Bradley greeted her with a toothy grin. She thought she might be even more ill now. He kept his hands to himself for most of dinner, but then his hand creeped back to her thigh. The gall of this man. She had a good mind to tell him exactly what she thought of his unwanted advances, but decided not to get into it with him. She leaned over to Harge.

“If Bradley doesn’t get his hand off my thigh, I am going to make him, and it’s not going to be pretty. Do something. Now!” she demanded in a heated whisper.

“Carol, would you like to dance?” Harge asked as he stood.

“Yes, I would. Thank you for asking.” She took his hand and stood.

They made their way to the dance floor. All eyes were on them. They were a beautiful couple. Carol was miserable, but put on a show. Being in Harge’s arms was better than having that old man paw at her.

“Harge, I’m going home after this dance. I simply can’t continue this charade. You need to tell Bradley to keep his hands to himself and tell your partners about the divorce. I’m not kidding this time, Harge.”

“Carol, we’ve had a nice night. Maybe we could …”

“Nice night?! You aren’t serious, are you? This evening has been miserable since we arrived.”

“Come on Carol, it hasn’t been that bad.”

“Well, it has been for me. Fucking Bradley putting his hands on me, like he has any right! You never call them on it, Harge – not once have you ever fucking called a single one of those perverts out!”

“I didn’t realize …”

“Bullshit! I call bullshit, Harge. I’ll catch a cab out front.” She pushed him away and started to leave.

“No, please take the car. Send it back after you get home safely.” He sounded defeated. He seemed to understand she meant it this time. “I’ll tell them tomorrow.”

“Thank you.”

She made her apologies to the table, then left. Still sick over Therese, but relieved she wouldn’t have to attend another one of these events with Harge and his cronies. Harge called the driver and he met Carol outside. Once she was home, she checked her phone again. Nothing. She undressed, put the jewelry in her safe and took a quick shower. She crawled into bed, exhausted. Should she text Therese one more time? Looking at her clock, it was late and she decided against it. 

What a mess, but Carol honestly didn’t know how to tell her. She wasn’t even sure Therese didn’t know she was Carolyn Ross, until she showed her the pictures at lunch. Any photographer that knew who she was either wouldn’t have taken the pictures, or would have sold them by now. Carol felt a tear and then the waterworks opened up. She really wanted to meet Therese tomorrow evening as they had planned. She figured any chance of a romantic date was off the table, but maybe Therese would agree to talk, let her explain. She looked at her phone one last time. _8.5 hours._ Her tears started all over again. She fell asleep hugging her pillow, hoping she would hear from Therese tomorrow morning.

* * *

Therese had been tossing and turning for the last 30 minutes. Every time she looked at her clock it was five minutes later, then another five, and another five. She finally got up a little after midnight, used the restroom and got out her laptop. She downloaded the pictures from the event, sorted them quickly, and sent them to the Times server. 

She lingered on the ones she had taken of Carol. God, she was beautiful. The dress was lovely, but the woman inside it really was truly stunning. She looked at her in more detail, her face, her bare shoulders, arms, and her back. Her eyes seemed a little vacant when she looked at them in the close ups. Like she was somewhere else. Where was Carol? She wasn’t looking at her husband the way she looked at her in the park at lunch. When Carol looked at Therese, they had a spark in them, they were alive with interest and curiosity. Were they happily married? She couldn’t let herself go there.

She warred with herself, decided not to do it, but then gave in and googled ‘Carolyn Ross’. First she started with images. God, she looks amazing in every picture! Could anyone take a bad photo of this woman? Therese thought no, I don’t think so; even without makeup Carol was gorgeous. There were pictures of her when she was very young, all the way up to a cover of Vanity Fair a few months ago. 

Then she saw them. Pictures of Carolyn on the red carpet last night. The majority of them showed her head down, her hand grasping at the wall, then her husband being dismissed, her hanging on to the PA. What was her name again? Oh right, Claire. There were only a few pics posted of her looking amazing in her white beaded dress. Scrolling the images, she noticed a pic that must have been taken by the Getty guy next to her. It was taken just as they had seen each other. It captured the pain in Carol’s eyes, the look she had given her for the briefest of moments when their eyes had locked in recognition. Sure enough, ‘GettyImages’ was in a prominent block over the image. She hadn’t gotten any of those images. Well, not with her camera anyway – they were seared into her brain. Poor Carol.

She went out and found her phone in the couch. She read the text from Carol again and felt bad for not answering. Then she reminded herself. Married. No, I can’t go there. Never again.


	6. Standing Wave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!  
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...

**Standing wave:** A resonance condition in an enclosed space in which sound waves traveling in one direction interact with those traveling in the opposite direction, resulting in a stable condition.

Carol’s phone vibrated on her bedside table. It was still dark outside, the only light in the room was from the glow of the cell’s screen. She opened her eyes, the light from the display casting strange shadows across the ceiling. Suddenly remembering Therese, she turned on her side and grabbed at the phone, knocking it on to the floor. “Shit!” she cursed as she leaned over trying to find the phone in the dark. It vibrated again, the screen giving up its hiding place. She picked it up and anxiously looked at the screen. She couldn’t read it, the images too blurry. “Damn it!” She sat up and fumbled around trying to find her glasses. Once her glasses were in place, she could finally read the screen.

It was a text from Abby. She closed her eyes and sighed, disappointed it wasn’t Therese.

_Are you up? -A_

_I am now. -C_

Her phone rang. She knew it was Abby without looking at the caller I.D. “Why are you calling me? It’s still dark outside. What the hell time is it anyway?”

“Good morning to you too,” Abby said sarcastically.

“Sorry, I was asleep, I’m not feeling well.” Carol flopped back on the bed.

“Why wasn’t your phone on silent then? Don’t blame me.”

“I was expecting, actually hoping for a call.”

“That sounds interesting! You gonna tell me about it?”

“Not right now, I’m going to go back to sleep!”

“Wait. Don’t you want to know why I called?”

“Not really. I have a headache and I’d like to get some more rest.”

“Well, you’re about to have a bigger headache. Have you seen the rags? Of course you haven’t. What happened last night?”

“What do you mean, what happened?”

“There are pictures plastered all over the tabloids showing you pushing Harge away and leaning on the wall of that red carpet thing you attended. Were you sick?”

“You could say that,” she said quietly. “Jesus! Really? Pictures are out of that?” Abby was right, her head hurt worse now and she felt queasy.

“Oh yeah, and they have made up some whoppers about you this time. Did you know you were expecting?” Abby laughed.

“I’m what?!” Carol exclaimed.

“Drunk,” she added. “Headed for Betty Ford any day now.”

“Seriously?!”

“Did you know Harge has been cheating on you?” she said secretively.

“Yes, I did know that,” Carol said, somewhat defeated.

“Who is the woman on the carpet?”

“The PA?” Carol felt a twinge of worry.

“No, the one sitting behind the rope line, maybe a photographer?”

“What do you mean?” Fear struck Carol to her core. Who had connected them? Did someone actually notice them looking at one another. Did they see Claire talking with Therese? Had someone put it together? She was immediately concerned for Therese. She didn’t ask for any of this; she didn’t deserve to be dragged into the fray.

“This one says that you sent your PA to talk to that girl, she was crying, and you looked at her then had a breakdown,” Abby paraphrased the story. “Oh, and they noticed you left early, too.”

“Breakdown? They can’t be serious. I lost my footing is all,” Carol tried to cover.

“There's a series of pics that seem to confirm the story. Carol? Is there something to this?” Abby asked, with concern in her voice.

“Which one is it? The Enquirer, Star?” Carol asked, disgusted by them all.

“TMZ,” her friend said matter of factly.

“Fuck! I hate those guys!”

“So, there is something to it?”

“Yes, and no. Oh Abby …” Carol felt adrift. How had they captured images and connected she and Therese to find some truth. It had all happened so quickly. More importantly, how was she going to deal with it?

“You know how these things go Carol – ignore it. They tell so many lies that they wouldn’t know the truth if it bit them in the ass. They’re just making this shit up. Besides, someone more famous will fuck up later today and you will be yesterday’s news.”

“But what about Therese?” _Shit!_ She didn’t mean to say her name, or admit anything more about it all yet.

“Therese?” Abby was interested now.

Carol was quiet, not wanting to talk about it anymore. Her head was pounding, her stomach in knots. She turned on her side and brought her knees to her chest, trying to calm her belly.

“Is she the woman sitting behind the rope line? The photographer?” Abby asked.

Carol was still quiet.

“Carol? Come on, it’s me.” Abby said.

“I was going to tell you, but then it all blew up in my face. I didn’t think there was anything to tell any longer. Over before it had a chance to start.” Carol sighed.

“Oh, Carol. Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“Later today?” Abby offered.

“She’s why my phone wasn’t on silent. I was hoping she would text or call,” Carol said, a tear falling down her cheek.

“Oh honey, I’m sorry. Go back to sleep, nothing to be done right now about any of this anyway. You can tell me about it later.”

“Ok. Maybe dinner if she breaks our date, which I’m almost sure she will.”

“Carol?” Abby said quietly.

“Yes?” Carol knew Abby was going to ask her a tough question by the tone of her voice.

“Does this mean you’re … I mean she’s a woman … and you’re talking about calls and a date …”

“Yes … can we talk about it later? I may need a strong shoulder to cry on.”

“I’ve got two of those. Where’s Rindy?”

“At Harge’s parent’s house. I’m supposed to pick her up tomorrow.”

“Good. Take some Advil or something and go back to sleep. Talk later.”

“Thank you, dearest. Later.”

* * *

Therese barely made it to work on time. She hadn’t fallen asleep until four am and then overslept. She was concerned that she hadn’t gotten any pictures of Carol as she had faltered on the red carpet. Of course, she had good reason, but her boss, nor anyone else, would ever know. She would make up some excuse of food poisoning or some other incapacitating illness to cover. 

Even if she had gotten shots of Carol in those moments, she wasn’t sure she would have been able to share them. She was shocked at the intense feeling of loyalty she had to Carol. She had such strong feelings of protection toward her, that she couldn’t betray her like that, ever.

When she logged into her computer, there was an email from her boss asking her to come see him when she had a moment. She made her way to his office, thinking of what she could tell him. When she got there, he had his back to her, looking out the window at the grey morning.

“Sir? You wanted to see me?” Therese said, her nerves making her stomach churn.

“Therese, there you are. How are you this morning? Everything go well last night? I saw the images you loaded on the server. Perfect! They were just perfect. Nice job!”

“Thank you. I’m glad you’re pleased with them.” She smiled, feeling like she was on more solid ground.

“Therese?” he asked.

“Yes, sir?”

“You don’t have to call me sir.” He smiled at her. “I heard Carolyn Ross had some problems last night.”

“Yes, si … I mean, yes she did. She seemed to be faint for a minute, or maybe she stumbled and had to steady herself on the wall. I don’t know what happened. She seemed to recover quickly,” she lied.

“Hmmm, that’s a shame. She’s a nice woman.” He came around his desk and looked at Therese a little closer. “I didn’t see any pics on the server of her, other than the standard, gorgeous, red carpet shots I would expect.”

“No sir.” Therese was again nervous.

“Let’s keep it that way, ok?” he said, like it would be a secret they kept between them.

“Ok,” she said, trying to hide her surprise.

“We just want shots for the ‘Style’ section this time. I’m sure the tabloids will get their pound of flesh. She doesn’t deserve it. Like I said, she’s a nice woman.”

“No problem. It will be like I never took them,” she lied again.

Unless, of course, it turns into a bigger story. If it does, I’m sure the paper will reach out to her people to get the real information. Well, we’ll get the story her people are spinning anyway.” He laughed at his own joke. 

Therese nervously laughed with him.

“We may be asked for the shots then,” he added.

Therese felt her stomach start to churn again. 

“Good job. Thanks for taking the job on such short notice. Check the Sunday paper, maybe you’ll see one of your shots. Have a good day, Therese.”

“Thanks, I will.” She practically ran back to her desk, feeling like she had dodged a bullet, at least for now.

* * *

Carol nursed her headache and general malaise all day. Her agent had called and asked if there was anything she should know about the red carpet ‘incident’ last night. Carol lied and told her no, she stumbled was all, lost her balance. Then there was the usual ‘Are you ok?, yes, fine, anything else, no, we’ll ignore this for now and talk next week’, and so on. She excused herself from the call, and went back to bed.

She woke up around three that afternoon, feeling a little better. She made herself a cup of tea and tried to eat something. By five, she had worked up the courage to text Therese again. She would probably still be at work, but maybe it would be ok. She sat down on her bed and picked up her phone. Her hands were shaking as she typed.

_2 hours. Any chance we can still get together? -C_

Carol waited. Nothing. She put her head down on her pillow, curled up on her side, and set the phone on the bed next to her. She prayed to any god that would listen. _Please._ A few minutes later her phone vibrated. She picked it up and rolled on her back, then read Therese’s answer.

_No. I can’t. -T_

Carol wasn’t surprised. She was hurt and she felt like she was drowning. Her chest was heavy and she was having a hard time breathing. It was an answer though – it was something. She typed back.

_Please Therese, give me a chance to explain. -C_

There wasn’t a pause this time. Therese texted her right back.

_Why? To what end? -T_

_Didn’t you feel it? Us? Together?-C_

_Yes, of course I did, but I can’t. -T_

_Why? -C_

_I just can’t right now. -T_

Carol clung to “right now” like a life ring tossed out to save her. Maybe there was hope?

_Will you at least think about it? Maybe meet in a few days? -C_

Silence … Carol added to her question.

_Just talk. I don’t want to leave it this way. -C_

_I’ll think about it. Give me some time. -T_

She’ll think about it?! Carol was hanging on to a life raft now. She wasn’t drowning anymore. She had hope.

_I never meant for it to turn out this way. It might be hard for you to believe, but you mean the world to me. -C_

_I know. I feel the same. -T_

Carol reread Therese’s last text at least six times. Had she read it right? She did feel there was something between them! Then why wouldn’t she see her, let her explain? At least she had hope now, some encouragement that Therese felt it too. She said to give her some time. She decided to leave it there, not push her luck. She called Abby to see if she would bring dinner and talk.

* * *

Abby showed up an hour and a half later with containers of their favorite Thai food. They opened a couple of beers and sat cross-legged across from each other at Carol’s coffee table. Abby handed Carol some chopsticks and lifted her glass to toast.

“To swimmin’ with bowlegged women!”

“What kind of a toast is that?! It sounds very risqué!” Carol looked at her best friend incredulously.

“I have no idea,” she said coyly. “The Captain says it in “Jaws”, it sounds like fun.” She laughed at the thought. “What do you want to toast to? You got something better?”

“No.”

“Then to swimmin’ with bowlegged women it is! Cheers!” Abby waggled her eyebrows.

They touched bottles and drank, then ate in silence for a few minutes.

“How’s the divorce coming along? Final yet?” Abby asked.

“Fred says early next month.”

“That’s only a few weeks away! We should have toasted to that instead!”

“A few weeks, assuming Harge signs the papers.”

“Why wouldn’t he? He’s got a girlfriend, it’s been clear for a long time that you’re done. Why would he want to hang on to someone that doesn’t want him?”

“He was holding out for alimony, but the judge all but laughed him out of court.”

“Good! Fucking Harge! His trust fund isn’t enough for him? He has to take your hard earned cash?”

“I think it was his way of punishing me for leaving him. We still have some custody arrangements to finalize, and if I have to pay any child support. Which I seriously doubt, we can both more than afford to take care of our daughter.”

“Well, I say good riddance to him. I suppose we’ll have to play nice for Rindy. I don’t want my goddaughter thinking her father is a …”

“Abby! Stop.” She laughed and tossed a soy sauce package at her. Abby was fiercely protective of she and Rindy, and she loved her all the more for it.

“Fine, but you know I’m right,” Abby replied, stealing the rest of Carol’s beer.

“Hey, I was drinking that!”

Abby shrugged her shoulders and smiled as she tipped the bottle up and finished it.  
“You want another?” she asked, getting up and heading for the kitchen.

“No. Can you grab me some water?” Carol asked.

“Sure.”

Abby came back with the drinks and sat down. They were quiet again, eating their dinner. Abby watched Carol, who seemed lost in thought. She knew her friend well enough to find the right moment to bring up a serious subject. The reason they were here tonight.

“So, you want to tell me about her?” Abby said softly.

“Oh Abby, I’ve made a mess of it with her.” Carol sighed.

“Tell me the good things first. Where did you meet her?

Carol told her about the boat and the swans, their dinner, their legs ‘embracing’ under the table, and how she and Rindy had played Therese’s animal game.

“Wait, you’re telling me she got Rindy to eat a salad?”

“Yes! She even got her to have a second helping! They were so cute pretending to be different animals. Civilized animals that sit up straight and use silverware! Can you imagine that?” Carol had a big grin on her face recounting the game. “Then she taught her how to spin her spaghetti using a spoon. Rindy really likes her.”

“I think her Mama really likes her,” Abby laughed, but there was a trace of melancholy in her voice. Carol caught it, but didn’t address it right then.

“I do. Abby, she’s just … she’s different, I don’t know exactly, I’ve never met anyone like her.”

“Have you kissed her?”

“Yes.” Carol’s cheeks colored a little bit. “The first night, and again yesterday, at lunch.”

“The first day? Bold, Carol! Very bold!”

“I know!” Carol laughed. “I didn’t mean to, I was just going to give her a hug, but she looked at me with those big emerald doe eyes, and she is so beautiful and warm, and she smelled good and her skin was so soft, and …”

“All right, all right!” Abby interrupted Carol’s list of Therese’s irresistible qualities. “I get it! She’s hot and your lips tripped and fell all over hers, so you had to kiss her!” Abby was laughing at her friend now.

“I couldn’t resist.” Carol had a dreamy smile on her face. “God, it was good. I think my toes are still curled! I felt free. I want to be free Abby. I want to be me, to quit hiding.”

“That’s quite a leap,” Abby said seriously.

“I’ve been going to tell you. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.” Carol reached out and took Abby’s hand and squeezed it.

“I’ve known this day would come eventually. I just didn’t think you would be willing to chance your career, your livelihood.”

“I’m not sure I can. Fred is looking into it. He has one of his contract guys looking at all of my current obligations. We’re most worried about Giorgio.”

“He loves you, Carol. Maybe he’ll be ok with it?”

“I think he will be ok with it, as long as it isn’t public.” Carol frowned.

“So what happened on the red carpet? What does it have to do with this girl? The one your lips tripped over?” she teased.

“Abby, she’s a woman, not a girl,” Carol corrected.

“She looks young. How old is she?”

“I don’t know for sure. She has her Master’s degree. She graduated last summer.”

“She’s young.” Abby seemed skeptical.

“I know, but I don’t think it matters. She has a gentle strength about her. She seems, I don’t know, more mature than most people in their early twenties.”

“Back to the event. What happened?”

“She’d never heard of Carolyn Ross. She only knows me as Carol Aird. She took a last minute photography assignment at work, and you saw the pictures. It never occurred to me that she would be assigned to cover the event. That was when she found out. I knew I had lost her in that moment. I could see the hurt in just those few seconds our eyes met. I felt sick, faint, like I might fall. I’m sure she feels mislead about my situation with Harge, she probably thinks we’re happily married, since we haven’t made it public yet. She won’t let me explain anything. She finally returned my text cancelling our date.”

“Her loss,” Abby said, trying to lighten Carol’s mood.

“I couldn’t have fucked it up more if I tried. I should have told her. I didn’t realize she had no clue until we had lunch yesterday. I was going to tell her tonight. I know she feels the attraction too, she admitted it in her last text. I don’t know why she won’t talk to me. I’ve only known her for three days and I’m heartbroken.”

“And you would be willing to come out for this girl? Publically, not just to family?”

“Woman – not girl, and I think so. She’s really … I don’t know … she’s amazing Abby, and I fucked it up royally.”

Tears started to fall again. “Damn it! I wasn’t going to cry anymore!”

Abby stood up and took Carol’s hand and pulled her up off the floor and moved to the couch. She sat first and took her sobbing best friend into her arms. Carol tucked her feet up on the couch and cried as Abby rubbed her back and spoke to her quietly.

“Carol, you are not only Carolyn Ross. She is just a part of you, a personna. You’re not that shy, scared sixteen year old girl, doing whatever her mother demanded. She’s no longer here to dictate your life. You are allowed to be happy, to love anyone you choose.”

“My career ending affects you too. What about our catalog launch? If I come out, will it jeopardize what we are trying to do with our clothing line?”

“It’s a couple months away. Who cares! Your happiness is more important than some online catalog. I’m certainly not in the closet. We’ll add some masculine clothing for women. You’ll model it in a special section. It can be tailored to fit women, but still have a feminine edge. Women will love it! Come to think about it, we should do that anyway. I’m brilliant!” Abby was excited about this new idea.

“Yes, you are brilliant,” Carol agreed.

“We already have some great home decor items, jewelry, and accessories. It’s going to be fabulous!” Abby exclaimed.

“I’ve always loved your optimism.” Carol sniffed through her tears, a slight smile on her face.

“Oh hell, if the catalog fails we’ll do something else. We’ll open a furniture shop. Who cares about gay ladies selling couches and end tables.” She laughed at her own joke and tightened her arms around Carol.

Carol sat up and took Abby’s hands in hers. “Abby, how can be so supportive? It sometimes seems as if you still want more between us.”

“I did, I do. I’ll always love you Carol, but it’s changed. We aren’t meant to share that earth shattering romantic love beyond all others. I’ve known that for quite a while now, but what we have is just as rare. I’ve known you my entire life. I will always be here for you. We’ll be in each other’s lives forever. Besides, I taught you everything you’ll need to know to knock this girl’s socks off once you finally get her in bed!”

Carol looked at her friend, a shocked smile on her face. “Abby! I can’t believe you … wait, so now what we had was just a training exercise?” she teased.

“I left a few things out, if you want to sign up for the advanced course.” She waggled her eyebrows at Carol, a hint of seriousness in her voice.

“Abby …” Carol said, suddenly serious.

“Oh, loosen up Carol, you can’t blame a girl for trying!” She laughed and took her hands away from Carol’s. She reached for her beer. “Besides, I’ve got my eye on a redhead. Owns a steakhouse outside of Paramus. I talking serious Rita Hayworth redhead.”

“You think you have what it takes to handle a redhead?” Carol said as she leaned back against a pillow on the couch.

They laughed and then Abby sobered up.

“If this Therese woman has captured your heart already, if you think she could be the love of your life, and is worth the challenges ahead, then fight for her. Do whatever it takes to get her back, get her to talk to you. You said you took her home, so you know where she lives, right?”

“Yes, but I couldn’t …”

“Jesus Carol, why are we sitting here crying in our beer! You have to go to her! Now! Tonight! Let’s go! I’ll drive!” Abby exclaimed, ready to storm Therese’s apartment building. “How can she turn you down if you’re standing in front of her. She’s not made of steel! No one with any sense could turn you down.”

“I can’t tonight. She said she wanted to think about it. I should give her some time.”

“Tomorrow then. You’ll pick up Rindy, we’ll have dinner together, then I’ll bring my favorite goddaughter back here and put her to bed. You’ll go to your girl and woo her back! I’ll stay here as long as you need me. Even spend the night if you, you know, convince her to take you back.” She gave Carol a big smile.

“I don’t know, Abby …”

“It’s a plan and I won’t take no for an answer. Now get me another beer, I'm staying in the guest room tonight.”


	7. Stereo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West! I may have made her a little "tense" while editing this chapter! Sorry, darling!
> 
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...

**Stereo:** From the Greek meaning solid. The purpose of stereo is not to give you separate right and left channels, but to provide the illusion of a three-dimensional, holographic image between the speakers.

There was a knock at Therese’s door. She reluctantly got up off the couch, wrapping the blanket that was over her legs around her body. She didn't really want to talk to anyone. She had been quiet at work and not returning calls. She opened the door with the chain still latched. Her best friend Dannie was in the hall.

“Hiya,” he greeted her. “Can I come in?” He held up a six pack of beer as an entrance fee.

“Dannie, I really don’t feel like seeing anyone right now,” she hedged.

“I’m not taking no for an answer. Something happened and you’ve been acting like a zombie for a couple days now. I need to see those dimples of yours,” he teased.

“Dannie, I just …” She couldn't finish her sentence before the tears began to fall.

“That’s it, open the door or I’m breaking the chain.”

She knew he’d do it if she didn't let him in. He had always been there for her before, and this time was no different. She shut the door and removed the chain, then opened it wide. Dannie put the beer down and took her in his arms.

“Awe Therese, what’s got you so upset? Who is she? Do I need to go have a word with this person?” 

“How do you know it’s a person?”

“Because you are so solid, but the last time you were this upset it was that woman.”

“I know, you’re right. You’re always right. I can’t get anything by you, Dannie,” she said through her tears as she moved from his arms back to the couch.

“So, what happened?” he asked. He grabbed two of the beers, opened them, and offered one to Therese. She took it. “Was it that new friend you met in the park?”

“Yes, it’s her.”

“You wanna tell me about her?”

“Oh Dannie, I’m so stupid!” She cried harder now. He put his beer down and sat next to her on the couch. He took her back into his arms. He held her and rubbed her back until she calmed a bit.

“I can’t believe you’re the stupid one here. She must have done something, not you.”

“I thought I might have found the one,” she sniffed, wiping her eyes with a tissue she had in her pocket. “Do you believe in love at first sight?” she asked.

“I suppose it can happen. Never happened to me, but that doesn’t mean it couldn’t.”

“I met her in the park – she’s stunning, tall, thin, with beautiful blond hair and her eyes are the prettiest shade of blue I’ve ever seen. She had the cutest little girl, we had a good time together, and I think she liked me. We had dinner, and sat in her car and talked for hours. Then she brought me home and we had the most amazing kiss I’ve ever shared with anyone.” She wiped her tears again.

“Is she the one you went to lunch with on Monday?” he asked.

“Yes. It was great. We talked more, we walked and held hands, then we kissed, well, kind of made out, under a tree in Bryant Park.” She had a dreamy smile on her face, remembering that afternoon.

“So, it sounds perfect. What changed?”

“I found out …” She didn't want to say it out loud, somehow thinking it would make it even more real.

“Found out what?” He put his finger under her chin and tilted her head up so she would look at him.

“She’s married.” She started to cry again. Dannie took her back into his arms.

“Not again, Oh Therese, I’m sorry.” He squeezed her tightly to his chest.

“At least you found out early this time. Last time was fucked up. That woman shouldn’t have lied to you. She was never leaving her husband. She just strung you along, not telling you the truth once!”

“I really loved her, Dannie. She was my first. When I found out she was married months later, it was too late. She told me she was going to divorce him, that she had already filed. I would have believed anything she told me. I was in love with her. When she went back to him, I was crushed, heartbroken, and depressed for months.”

“I remember.”

“Dannie, what would I have done without you? You brought me back.” Therese hugged him a little tighter, then sat up and leaned against the arm of the couch. “I can’t go through that again. I need to let this one go now, before I invest any more of my heart. I really thought there was a chance. We had this magnetic connection from the minute our eyes met in the park. I just knew she was the one.” She started crying again. “I guess I was wrong. Again.”

“It’ll happen for you. I mean – look at you! You’re great! Anyone that had you would be the luckiest person alive. If you ever want to switch teams …” He winked at her.

“I love you Dannie, I do, but we can only ever be friends. I don’t, I mean, you’re a man and I don’t …”

“I get it, I really do. I just thought maybe …” He looked a little hurt, but recovered quickly. “Let’s go down to the bar, get you out of here for a while.”

“Ok, let me go wash my face and put a little makeup on.”

“You look perfect to me, but go do your girly stuff if you want. I’ll drink your beer, since you’re not.” He smiled as he took a drink.

* * *

Carol had dinner with Rindy and Abby as planned at Carol’s apartment. After Rindy went to bed, Carol went and changed her clothes. She put on dark jeans, a t-shirt, some running shoes, and a dark hoodie. 

“How do I look?” she asked Abby.

“Very urban chic. How can she resist,” Abby teased.

“Really? Should I change?” she said self-consciously.

“Carol, you look great. Now get out of here! Take my car.” She tossed her the keys. “In case TMZ is watching the building. They probably know your car.”

“Thank you, darling,” she said, then kissed Abby on the cheek, grabbed her purse and headed out.

“Good luck!” Abby yelled as Carol shut the door.

* * *

Carol parked in front of Therese’s building, almost exactly where she had parked before. She looked through the windshield at the spot where they had kissed the first time. She sighed, thinking of a happier time. She put the hood of her jacket up and slid on her sunglasses. She got out of the car and noticed Therese coming out of the building with a man. They were laughing and their arms were linked. She felt a surge of jealousy so strong she was almost sick to her stomach.

She took a deep breath and walked around the front of the car, watching Therese the whole time.

“Therese?” she called to her.

Therese turned toward the voice when she heard her name. It sounded like Carol, but the figure standing under the lamppost wasn’t dressed as she would expect to see Carol.

“Therese,” Carol said again as she removed her sunglasses and pushed the hood off her head.

Dannie was gobstruck. “Holy shit, that’s … “

“Shhh, I know,” Therese said, letting go of Dannie’s arm. “Give me a minute, ok?”

“She’s the one that you met in the park?” he said, looking around her. 

“You can’t say anything. Promise me?” Therese said in a serious tone.

Carol heard Therese protecting her. Maybe there was hope. She clearly felt some loyalty to her if she was willing to ask her friend to keep quiet about her identity.

“Yeah, ok,” Dannie agreed.

“I’m serious Dannie, not a word to anyone,” Therese repeated her request.

“But holy shit … she’s …”

“I know,” she interrupted him. “Now just give me a minute.” 

Dannie backed off, giving Therese some privacy, trying not to stare at Carol, or Carolyn as he knew of her.

“Therese,” Carol said fondly.

“Why are you here?” Therese’s voice had an edge to it.

“I wanted to talk with you about the other night.”

“I’d rather not. I have a date with my friend right now.”

“Therese, won’t you let me explain?” She looked over at Dannie. “Alone?”

“I feel like I don’t even know who you are, Carol. Carolyn Ross isn’t the woman I know,” Therese said.

“You’re right, that isn’t me. Well, it’s certainly part of me, but Therese, the woman you know is the real me. Just Carol. I just wanted to be honest, to be me with someone. You didn’t seem to recognize me as Carolyn, you just saw me, Carol. Yet, in being honest with you, it feels like I lied to you. It wasn't intentional.”

“You’re married, a celebrity. I’d never heard of Carolyn Ross, and there you were on that damn red carpet. You should have said something,” Therese said, anger and hurt in her voice.

“Divorcing,” Carol said quietly, so Dannie couldn’t hear. “I was going to tell you on our date. I just didn’t know how to tell you without sounding like a pretentious jerk.”

“Still, you should have given me a clue.”

“I can see that now. I had no idea you would be there. Can’t we talk privately somewhere? I don’t want to lose you over this,” Carol almost pleaded with the younger woman. Her eyes searched Therese’s for some forgiveness.

Therese averted her eyes, looking at the ground. “You never had me,” she lied.

Carol took a step back, bumping into Abby’s car. She leaned on it, Therese’s words hitting her like a physical blow. “Therese, please ...” she tried one more time.

“Please what, Carol? What future is there in this, between us?”

“I don’t know, but I want to find out. Can’t we just take a few minutes to try and work it out?”

“I have plans right now,” Therese said flatly and looked over at Dannie.

“Tomorrow, maybe?” Carol asked hopefully, as she reached for Therese’s hand.

“Don’t,” Therese said, as she pulled her hand away and took a small step back. “I can’t think clearly if you touch me,” she said quietly. Her eyes softened a little bit as she looked into Carol’s.

Carol felt wounded now, but she still had some fight left in her. “Doesn’t that say something about us? Shouldn’t we see if there is a chance this could work?”

Therese was quiet for a few moments, then said, “I’ll think about it. Maybe I’ll call you in a few days.”

“All right.” Carol felt defeated. The ball was in Therese’s court now. She had given it her best shot.

“Goodnight, Carol,” Therese said softly.

Therese’s hurt was evident in her posture and when their eyes met, Carol could see the desire still there. She had hope.

“Goodnight, Therese.”

Carol put her sunglasses back on and pulled the hood back over her head. She slowly walked around Abby’s car and got in. She sat for a minute and dug around in her purse for a tissue. She wiped her nose, but let her tears fall freely down her cheeks.

She drove home feeling lost, but there was a small chance that she might hear from Therese in a few days. She had done everything she could to try and sway her.

* * *

Therese and Dannie continued on to the bar down the street.

“Therese, that was Carolyn Ross,” Dannie said as if Therese didn’t know.

“Thanks, Sherlock. Where the fuck were you three days ago,” she said angrily.

“Hey, hey. I’m sorry. You really like her, don’t you?”

“Yes, damn it!” Therese said, as she dried her tears with her coat sleeve. “And ‘like’ doesn’t adequately cover it.”

“What did she say to you?”

“She said they’re divorcing. I’ve heard that before,” she said sarcastically. “I think that’s a big secret, so don’t say anything to anyone.”

“I won’t. So what if you cool your jets and stay in touch with her? See if she’s telling the truth. Get to know her better, maybe be friends for awhile,” he suggested.

“I’ll think about it. God, Dannie, I just wanted to be in her arms. I just wanted to kiss her.”

“That’s so hot!” Dannie teased.

“Dannie! I can’t believe you!” She actually laughed a little bit and slapped his arm.

“Seriously,” he said as he opened the door for her to go into the bar, “Give her a chance to prove herself. I’ve only heard good things about her, and that’s tough in her business. Even tougher to be gay, so maybe that’s part of her problem.”

“Maybe …” Therese said, deep in thought.

* * *

Abby was waiting for Carol at the kitchen island when she got home. She’d been working on her laptop.

“How did it go? You're home sooner than I thought you would be,” Abby said, as she took off her glasses, then tilted her head to get a better look behind the sunglasses.

Carol took off the sunglasses and revealed her puffy red eyes. Mascara had run down her cheeks. She fell into Abby’s arms and cried. By the time Carol had shed all the tears she had left and gone over what had happened, she and Abby had had two glasses of wine. Abby sent her to her room with a third glass. She instructed her to finish the wine, take a shower and go to bed. She told Carol she would stay in the guest room in case Rindy needed anything and not to worry. It might still work out.

* * *

Carol felt a little bit better after her shower. She sat down on her bed and took a sip of wine. She rarely drank more than one glass, as she liked to remain in control and she didn’t really need the extra calories. Tonight was different. 

Her phone buzzed as she was getting into bed. It was her agent. She plugged in her earbuds and answered the call. They spoke about the TMZ thing and a few other business things. Her phone vibrated indicating another call coming in. She picked it up and didn’t believe the caller ID at first. She told her agent she had another call that she had to take. She would call her back tomorrow. Butterflies filled her stomach. She gulped down the rest of the wine and answered.

“Hello. Therese?” Carol said hesitantly.

“I was … horrible. Before. Will you forgive me?” Therese apologized.

“I understand,” Carol answered, still not believing it was Therese on the phone.

“No, I was just being hurtful. I don’t know why, I’m not usually like that.”

“I know. I can’t imagine you hurting anyone on purpose.”

“I saw the TMZ story on TV at the bar. Have you seen it?” Therese asked.

“No, but I know it’s out there.”

“There was a close up of me sitting behind the ropes, wiping my eyes on my sleeve. I was so embarrassed, but no one there seemed to notice it was me. Except Dannie, of course.”

“Oh Therese, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know they had film of you. You don’t deserve that. They should leave you alone.” Carol was angry now. “I try not to watch those things, but I’ll watch to see how bad it was for you.”

“You don’t have to. I don’t think they know my name, and they can’t prove that we have anything to do with one another.”

“They might be trying to figure it out,” Carol warned. “They might find out who you are, and they won’t have any shame in telling the world. They may even make up some terrible story about us.”

“It doesn’t matter. They haven’t got anything. How could they know the truth?” Therese asked.

“They can’t, darling. They just make stuff up, and they may have accidentally put two and two together this time. They are just guessing, and it’s usually best to ignore them.”

“But I’m just a regular person, Carol. If my boss finds out, I might have a problem.”

“Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that. Usually, these things blow over quickly. They find someone else to drag through the mud, and they’ll forget all about us.”

“It freaked me out. Dannie calmed me down, but I may have had too much wine,” she admitted.

“Do you want to meet, talk about it? About the divorce? I’ll tell you whatever you want to know,” Carol offered.

“I’m not sure about meeting. I’m confused Carol, but I confess, I wanted to hear your voice. Um, I’m a little drunk. The wine has given me the liquid courage I needed to call in the first place.”

“I am too. I’ve had three glasses of wine. I rarely have more than one. It’s good to hear your voice. I wasn’t sure I would ever hear it again,” Carol admitted quietly.

“I can still feel your kisses, your arms around me, your perfume on my clothes, but they aren’t you, they’re like echoes of you. Just faint, hollow reminders of what I thought might be something special. I foolishly thought you might be the one, after only two days, but I think was mistaken.”

“No, you aren’t mistaken. When we’re together, I feel alive, Therese. Like I’ve been living in the dark and you’re the sun rising over me. You bring warmth and light I never knew existed. I think you might be a once in a lifetime chance for me. I know we’ve barely spent any time together, but I feel it. I want to be with you. It’s complicated, but I want to figure it out with you.”

“I want that too Carol, but I just feel like I can’t. I know this sounds cliche, but it’s not you, it’s me. I said I wouldn’t get involved with another married, straight woman ever again.”

“Therese, honestly, it’s not what you think. We’ve been separated for years, unhappily married even longer. I’m taking my life back. We’re divorcing. It’s just not been made public yet.”

“I want to believe you, I just don’t know if I can trust you. That’s not about you, but about my past. Dannie suggested we should stay friends until the divorce is final. ”

“I think I can do that. So does that mean we can agree to keep talking? Not give up on this?”

“Yes. Talking is fine, but aren’t you straight, Carol? You married a man.”

“I’m not. I know what I want. I want _you_ , Therese,” Carol said, conviction and lust in her voice.

“I want you too.” Therese was unable to hide her desire for the tall blond. Carol’s voice and the way she said ‘I want you’ hit Therese like a warm wave, her body’s arousal betraying her fear. She paused for a moment then continued. “Have I mentioned that wine makes me naughty?” she confessed, liquid courage once again destroying the carefully constructed walls around her heart.

“No, you haven’t.” Carol”s interest was piqued now.

“Naughty in a good way.” She smiled to herself. “Where are you?” she asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

“In bed. Why?” Carol laughed softly, a deep rich throaty sound, her voice lower than normal.

“Mmm, what are you wearing?” Carol’s laugh and the wine made her brave now. Therese closed her eyes, picturing Carol in bed.

“A silk nightgown.”

“What color is it?” 

“Black with lace,” Carol answered, wondering where this was going.

“Mmm, I bet you look amazing. I bet you feel amazing.” Therese was surprised she had added that last part, but it was out now.

“Where are you?” Carol returned the question, in a low and sultry tone.

“In bed too.”

“I see.” A jolt of arousal coursed through Carol’s body. 

“Do you?” Therese asked flirtatiously.

“Yes.” She took a deep breath, then asked, “What are you wearing?”

“Nothing.”

Carol let out a little moan she didn’t mean for Therese to hear, but she did hear.

“Carol?” Her voice was lower, slow and sexy. Carol’s moan ignited Therese’s body.

“Yes?” She could hardly breathe. Were they going to … She should stop it.

“I’m thinking about you right now, your hands, your mouth, it’s making me …”

“Therese, you’re killing me. We should stop,” she interrupted her. Was this really happening? She was so turned on. Would they be talking this way without the courage of the wine? What was the saying ’En vino veritas’? In wine, truth? So much for staying just friends ...

“I don’t want to stop. I want you here, beside me, touching me,” Therese continued.

“I want that too. Where am I touching you?” Carol asked. She couldn't stop it now, committing to whatever this is that they’re doing. She would have to keep her voice down, knowing Abby and Rindy were on the other side of the apartment.

“Your hands are in my hair and your lips are on mine, moving down over my jaw to my neck,” Therese cooed, her fingers tracing the path she described on her own body.

Carol continued. “Up to your ear. My breath is hot against you. You’re so sexy, your skin so soft. I’m taking your lips with my mouth again, your lips are so demanding, and my tongue is slowly entwining with yours.”

Therese’s voice was in Carol’s ears, traveling throughout her body. 

“I’m kissing your neck now, biting, soothing with hot kisses. God, your neck is so sexy, Carol. I’m kissing down over your shoulder, then nipping along your collarbone. Your skin tastes good.” 

“Fuck,” Carol whispered.

“Yes,” Therese said breathily. “I’m kissing down your chest to your breasts. Take off your nightgown for me, baby.”

Carol moaned at Therese calling her ‘baby’. She didn't know why, but it was hot. She moved the phone resting on her chest under the gown, now able to slide the black silk over her head. “It’s on the floor.”

“Mmm, good girl, now where were we. Mmm yes, I'm admiring your beautiful breasts.” Therese’s voice was like honey dripping all over Carol’s body.

“Therese. Where are your hands?” Carol asked, needing to visualize what the younger woman was doing in her bed.

“On my breasts, massaging them, thinking about your hands.”

“Yes, my hands are holding them, massaging them. My mouth has kissed down your neck, over your chest to your nipple, I’m biting down, my teeth gently pulling, then sucking you into my mouth. Am I driving you crazy yet, darling?” Carol asked, her voice a full octave lower, vibrating into the phone.

Therese pinched her own nipple and pulled it, imagining it’s Carol’s mouth. “Yes,” she gasped into the phone. “More Carol, I need more of you,” she moaned.

“I’m kissing your chest, my mouth open. My tongue is hot, tasting your skin, moving to your other breast. I’m biting and circling my tongue around your rosy nipple, blowing on it, watching as it becomes even more erect.” Carol was all in, completely caught up in this now.

“Oh god, Carol.” Therese lifted off her bed a little bit, unable to stay still.

“I’m dragging my red nails lightly down your sides around your ribs as I worship your breasts.” Carol’s hands moved around her own ribs, then onto her breasts.

Therese responded, “My hands are in your hair, I’m pulling you back up to my mouth, plunging my tongue in, running it over your teeth, your tongue, your lips. I’ve flipped us over. I’m on top of you now, Carol. Can you feel me? Our skin touching everywhere … all over … so soft. Our bodies are pressed against one another.”

Carol was breathing heavily now, her chest pounding. “Mmmm … fuck yes … you feel so good.” Her imagination was running wild. She tried to keep her moans quiet. “Mmm. Can you feel my hands on your back, holding you tightly, my nails leaving scratches on your skin? My hands are moving down, my fingers making small circles at the base of your spine. They’re on your ass now, squeezing and pulling you even closer. I can feel your hips moving against mine.”

“Yes, I feel it.” Therese moaned, her hips were moving now, her hand starting to move down her own stomach. “My mouth is moving to your breasts,” she said breathlessly.

Carol took up the sensual volley and returned it. “I’m slipping my thigh between your legs. I can feel how wet you are as your hips buck and make little circles against me. I’m pressing my leg into you harder,” Carol growled.

“I’m grinding against you as I take your nipple in my mouth and circle it with my tongue, and now I’m sucking in as much of your breast as my greedy mouth can take. My hand is on the other. I’m moving my mouth to the other now and circling your nipple and sucking hard, kissing the round heaviness of your lovely breasts, then down to your stomach.” 

“I’ve moved my legs and spread them for you. I miss your hot center, but your juices are still warm on my thigh. Holy fuck, Therese,” she panted. Her short shallow breaths made it hard to talk. Carol’s hands were touching and pinching her own breasts, her fantasy telling her it was Therese. Carol felt a flutter in her abdomen, a rush of warmth between her legs.

“Carol?” Therese whispered.

“Yes?” she answered in an equally hushed tone.

“Are you wearing panties?”

“Yes.”

“Take them off for me,” she said.

“Ok.” She did.

“Are they wet, Carol? Are you ready for me?” Therese purred into the phone.

“Yes.” She could barely form the word.

“Take your hand and imagine it’s my mouth between your legs.”

Carol did as Therese instructed. “Fuck.” She couldn't believe she was so wet. “Are you touching yourself, Therese? It’s me touching you, my fingers, my mouth.”

“Yes, I’m imagining your fingers, your mouth.” She moaned. “My mouth kisses down, down, and further down, until I am right above you. Are you ready for me, Carol?” Therese asked.

“Yes, so ready.” Carol’s hips had started to move erratically.

“I’m slowly parting your thighs and I’m taking in your beauty. Oh God, you’re so ready for me. Is it all for me, Carol?”

“Yes … all … all ... for … you …” Carol gasped.

“My mouth is on you. Can you feel me?” Therese asked breathily.

“Yes,” she moaned. 

“Move with me, Carol,” Therese almost begged.

“I am, oh fuck, Therese …”

“My tongue is licking through your folds, up and around, then back down. I’m drinking in your juices. God, you taste so good. Mmmmm, my tongue swirls around you again. Am I driving you crazy licking, sucking, and circling? My arm is over your hips – they are moving wildly under me.”

“Fuck yes … holy fuck ... Therese! Don't stop …”

“My tongue rolls around your opening and I am inside you, as far as I can go, licking and curling against your silky warm walls. Mmmm Carol ...” she moaned, a sound from deep within her body.

Carol slid a finger inside herself and was completely engaged with Therese. She turned her head and cried out her name into her pillow. “Therese … oh … I …fuck ...”

“You taste divine, salty, sweet, delicious. My mouth is circling, spiraling in, where you need me most, my finger replaces my tongue. Can you feel my rhythm, Carol? In … and … out, in … and … out, slowly, now picking up speed.”

“Yes.” Her breathing was shallow now, barely able to catch any air.

“I’ve added another finger and my mouth is hot, circling you. Mmm, oh god … Carol.” Therese’s finger slipped inside her own body, matching the rhythm she imagined she had with Carol. Her thumb circled. She was so ready.

Carol was so close to coming undone. “Fuck, oh fuck, oh … Therese!” Her own fingers did as Therese described.

“Carol, I’m so close, tell me what you’re feeling,” Therese pleaded.

”I’m … not … sure I ...can,” she said, gasping for air, her heart pounding.

“Try,” she moaned.

“I feel like you’re here … with me … your mouth is so hot, I can feel you inside me, holy fuck, Therese. I’m … I’m …”

“Carol! I’m … Oh god, Carol!” she cried out as she felt her body tense, every muscle taut, as the spasms deep within hit her hard.

“Therese! Therese ...” she groaned into her pillow, trying to keep her pleasure from waking the house.

Then the phones were silent, except the sounds of the lovers as they tried to catch their breaths.

“Carol,” she whispered as she calmed.

“Therese,” she whispered back.

Carol clenched her thighs together and curled on her side. Therese’s voice, along with the throbbing and fading contractions, still gave her body pleasure. “Therese,” she whispered again.

Therese’s body felt like every muscle had tensed as she’d lifted off her bed. Her body was now settled, but still pulsing. Her heart still raced. “Carol,” she answered.

They didn’t talk; they just listened to each other’s labored breaths, little moans escaping their lips, each one coming down from their climax.

“Don’t hang up,” Therese said quietly, completely spent.

“I won’t,” Carol whispered back, still feeling small tremors in her body from Therese’s words.

They were quiet again, content in the electronic connection they shared.

They both drifted off, their phones keeping watch over them, beaming soft breaths from one lover’s mouth into the phone, to the cell tower, then to the satellite far above the Earth, then back to a cell tower across town, and to the other’s phone, then to her lover’s ear, and back.


	8. Attenuate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!  
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...

**Attenuate:** To reduce the level of an electrical or acoustical signal. Reduction in sound level.

A siren passed on the street below the apartment and woke Carol. She opened her eyes and blinked a few times, then picked up her phone. The screen was blurry, but she could see her call with Therese was still connected. She listened closely and could barely hear Therese’s soft breathing. She smiled and turned over on her back, very aware of her nakedness. It had been quite a long time since she’d experienced the sensation and freedom of her bare body sliding between the sheets. Her head was still spinning a little from the wine, but other than that, she felt amazing. Her ear was sore from the earbud that had been against her pillow. She took it out for a moment, rubbed her ear and put it back, still wanting the connection with Therese.

“Therese? Angel?” she said softly. There was no response. She tried again. “Therese, my beautiful angel,” she said quietly.

“Mmmm … Carol,” Therese whispered.

“Are you awake, darling?” Carol asked.

“Yes, sleepy …” the younger woman murmured.

“Darling, we should probably hang up,” Carol gently suggested.

“Don’t want to,” Therese said stubbornly. 

Carol could hear the rustling of sheets. “Call me when you wake up, ok?”

Therese seemed a little more awake now, “Ok, what time do you get up?”

“Rindy usually wakes me around six-thirty. In fact, I need to put some clothes on. She’s a little too old to find her mother in bed nude,” Carol chuckled.

“You’re naked. Mmmmm ...” Therese’s voice was low and suggestive.

“The feeling is mutual, darling.” Carol had a vision of Therese next to her, bare skin glowing in the moonlight, with her long dark hair splayed out across the pillow. She wished it was real and not just in her imagination.

“Carol?”

“Hmmm?”

“Our … um … _conversation_ … was incredible,” the younger woman said softly.

“Mmmm, yes it was,” Carol agreed.

“I’ll talk to you soon,” Therese whispered.

“I can’t wait. Sleep well, angel.”

“You too.” Therese paused. “I still don’t want to hang up.”

“Me either, but we need rest, darling.”

“I’ll talk to you soon. Goodnight,” Therese said, almost asleep again.

“Goodnight,” Carol said quietly. She hesitated, realizing she didn’t want to hang up, but she knew she needed sleep, so she reluctantly ended the call.

* * *

Rindy bounced on the bed and then on the sleeping woman.

“Oooof!” Carol expelled a breath as her daughter landed right on her chest. Her pajama clad body spread out across her mother. The child wrapped her arms around her mother, hugged her tight, and then gave her a sloppy kiss on her cheek. Carol wrapped her arms around her daughter and kissed her on top of her head.

Carol’s own head was lightly pounding and her stomach felt a little queasy from the wine. The movement of the bed aggravated her symptoms, but she didn’t care; she felt like she was on cloud nine after her telephone call with Therese last night. Carol hoped Therese would feel the same way in the sober, probably hungover, light of day.

“Mommy, wake up! You’ve been sleeping _FOREVER!_ ” Rindy exclaimed dramatically.

Carol rolled Rindy over and tickled her all over her ribs and tummy. Rindy giggled and wriggled away from her to the other side of the bed. Carol knew this was just a momentary retreat. Sure enough, Rindy was right back in her arms, and the tickle war was in full force. After a few minutes, Rindy settled in close and sat cross legged facing her mother. Carol was on her side curled around Rindy, her arm around her back, little knees pressed against her. She adjusted her head on her pillow so she could see Rindy’s face better.

“Aunt Abby says you need to get up,” Rindy dutifully reported.

“What time is it?” 

“I don’t know. Late! You missed breakfast. We had pancakes!”

“Pancakes! Aunt Abby is spoiling you.”

“She said she was going to get me hyped up on syrup and chocolate chips, then send me in here to get you. What does that mean?” 

“It means Aunt Abby’s in big trouble! Chocolate chips! Did you save me any?”

“Yes. Blueberry ones.”

“Well then, Aunt Abby is spoiling me too.” She squeezed her mini me. “Should I get up then, or stay asleep?” Carol pretended to go back to sleep, complete with little fake snores.

“Mommy!” She took her hands and shook Carol’s shoulder back and forth to wake her up again.

“Ok, ok! I’ll get up,” Carol said.

“Yes!” The small blond launched herself against her mother and curled in her arms for a quick snuggle. Then she was off the bed and out the door. Carol smiled and shook her head at her little girl.

She thought of Therese. Had she missed her call? She sat up and threw her legs over the edge of the bed, then ran her fingers through her hair, shaking it out away from her head. She put her glasses on and picked up her phone. It was nine-fifteen. There was a text from Therese.

_Woke up late, headed to work. Will call later. -T_

Carol looked at the text with mixed feelings. The note was rather impersonal given their encounter last night. Therese had said she was running late, so maybe she was just in a hurry. She had to admit she was a little sad not to see the little ‘<3’ before the ‘T’. On the other hand, she had texted, so she was still talking. Carol decided not to ruin her buzz from last night with worry – she would enjoy it until she had reason to believe there was a problem. She texted back.

_Good morning, darling. Looking forward to your call. xo-C_

* * *

Therese woke up with a hangover, the likes of which she hadn’t experienced since her early college days. “Damn you, Dannie …” she said out loud, cursing her friend for getting her drunk. She made her way to the bathroom, then took two Advil and drank two large glasses of water. She looked at herself in the mirror. _I look like something the cat dragged in. Why am I naked? What the hell time is it? What happened last night?_ She went back to look for her phone. It wasn’t on the nightstand charging, it wasn’t on the dresser, _shit._ She rooted around in her bed, finally finding it. _Five after eight! My battery is almost completely drained. Why was the phone in my … bed ..._ She sat down for a minute and remembered a really hot dream she had had about Carol. _It was a dream … right?_

She looked at recent calls and saw a two hour and twenty-five minute call to Carol. She felt heat rising from her chest, up her neck, over her cheeks and all the way to the shell of each ear. She put her hand over her mouth and gasped. _Oh my god! It wasn’t a dream! Carol must think I’m some kind of a nymphomaniac! Fucking wine!_ Her last thought actually made her chuckle. _Fucking wine is a little too accurate in this case. So what now, Therese? Did you make a fool of yourself? If memory serves, it was amazing! God, if it was that good without even touching her, what would it be like … No! Stop it! I’ve got to slow this runaway train down. Put the brakes on. Dannie was right, I should try and be friends with her until there are signed divorce papers. Damn it, I won’t let my heart be trampled like that again. Ever! Crap, eight fifteen now. I have to shower and get to work!_

She texted Carol and promised to call her later. She signed it “<3-T”, but then remembered she needed to slow things down. She backspaced and got rid of the heart, hit send, plugged her phone in and then got in the shower..

* * *

Carol breezed into the kitchen with her cobalt blue silk robe flowing around her, blond hair slightly mussed and a big smile on her face. Abby was sitting at the bar with her computer and a mug of coffee.

“Good morning! Thanks for letting me sleep in. Where did Rindy go?” Carol asked.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t sleeping freaking beauty,” Abby teased. “She’s in her room choosing her outfit for the day.” Then she really looked at Carol. “You are way too happy for a person who should be slightly hungover, and whose potential girlfriend all but dumped her last night. If I didn’t know better, I’d say something changed and I’m wondering if I should go look in your room for said small brunette.”

“She’s not in my room Abby,” Carol said. She looked away, closed her eyes and smiled. She walked to the coffee press and poured herself a small cup of coffee, then carried it to the refrigerator and put a bit of cream in it. She normally only allowed herself cream on Sundays, but today it was a little celebration of her current mood.

“Cream in your coffee on Thursday?! All right, spill. What happened between crying on the couch, ’the world is ending if I don’t win this girl back’, to this morning, gliding around the kitchen like Michelle Kwan, with that goofy smile on your face?”

“She called me. We … um … we _talked_ ,” Carol said shyly. She leaned her behind against the sink.

“Is that what you kids are calling it these days?” Abby teased, then noticed Carol’s smile had grown. “Wait a minute, what exactly do you mean by _talked_?” she questioned.

“Abby, it was a very, how shall I say it? _Intimate conversation._ ” Carol could feel her cheeks coloring and her smile had crept back even wider.

“You had phone sex?!” Abby loudly whispered, as she leaned toward Carol, in case little ears were listening. “Really?! Are you fucking kidding me?!” She whipped her head around, making sure her goddaughter hadn’t heard her swearing. Then focused back on her best friend.

Carol looked at Abby over her coffee cup. Her eyes sparkling, the wrinkles at their corners deep with mirth, and her cheshire cat smile evident as she sipped her coffee. She lowered the mug and said, “Yes!” She threw her head back and laughed, then looked back at her best friend. “Yes, we did!”

* * *

Therese dragged into work and managed to make it in only ten minutes late. Dannie wasn’t at his desk when she sat down. She was actually grateful, not ready to face him yet, or anyone else for that matter. She decided she would call Carol on her lunch hour, and focus on her work until then. Maybe she would feel a bit better and have some idea of what she would say when she spoke to her. She was a little embarrassed at her drunken behavior.

She got up from her desk an hour later and went to the kitchen to get something to drink. The kitchen was quiet and natural light filled the room. There were several tables, a counter with a microwave, coffee-maker, all the related condiments and tea. A refrigerator, and a couple of vending machines hummed across the room. The coffee was stale and almost gone, so she rinsed out the old sludge and brewed a new pot. She walked over to the windows along the far wall, looked outside and leaned against the sill. She allowed herself to think about the late night call while the coffee brewed. Her nose filled with the rich scent of the coffee already in the air. 

What would she say to Carol when she called her. Her text back had been signed with the ‘xo-C’ she loved so much. Slowing this down wasn’t going to be easy. She supposed she should be honest with her about how she felt. _Should I apologize for initiating the call in the first place?_ She felt her cheeks flush just thinking about it. She should have known better, even drunk, than to call the beautiful blond. She knew the effects wine had on her. If wine made her naughty, hearing Carol’s voice on the phone had made her absolutely incorrigible! She had remembered more about their call over the morning, but hadn’t really allowed herself to dwell on it until now. It had been incredible. She loved the way Carol had sworn in the heat of passion and called her ‘darling’ and ‘angel’. She wasn’t much on nicknames, but it was different with Carol. _Did I call her baby? Oh god, I think I did!_

She poured herself a cup of coffee and went back to her desk. Dannie leaned around his computer monitor.

“Morning. How’s your head? We had a lot to drink last night.” Dannie laughed.

“Yeah, we did. My head is a little better now, but it was a rough morning,” Therese admitted.

“I don’t know how you do it,” he said, shaking his head.

“What?”

“You look like a million bucks this morning. I feel like death warmed over.” He rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands. “How’d you sleep?” Dannie asked innocently.

Therese turned beet red and wouldn’t look at her friend.

“Therese? What happened? You’re bright red. You look like a freshly cooked lobster!” He came around and sat on the edge of her desk.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” She continued to blush and wouldn’t look at him.

“Come on, you gotta give me something.”

“I called her,” she said under her breath.

“What?” He leaned closer.

“I called her,” she said louder, still not looking at him.

“You what?! Really? What happened?”

Therese was quiet. She finally looked up at him. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Did you have a fight?”

“Um … no.”

“Then what?”

She looked around to see if anyone was near by. Satisfied they were out of earshot from everyone in the bullpen, she leaned over and said quietly, all in one word.  
“Wehadaveryaffectionateconversationanditwasfuckingamazing!” Her dimples were deep in her red cheeks now.

“What?”

“You heard me.”

“I heard you speaking, but I didn’t understand anything you just said. Tell me again.”

“I told you. Don’t make me say it again. I’m so embarrassed!” She covered her face with her hands.

“Therese, look at me.”

She slowly took her hands away from her face and looked at him.

“Ok. Now, one more time, slower, and separate the words for me.”

She leaned over and whispered in his ear, “I had phone sex with her last night.”

“Seriously?!” he said loudly. Some of the other people in the bullpen looked over at them.

“Shhh! Dannie.”

“That’s so fucking hot! You lucky dog, getting it on with Carommmph...”

Therese had put her hand over his mouth, interrupting him. “Shhh! Stop that! No names!” she whispered angrily.

“Sorry,” he apologized. “So what happens now? Are you two together?”

“I don’t know. I told her I would call her.”

“So what are you waiting for? Go call her!”

“I’m going to, at lunch. I don’t know what to say.”

“Just call her, you’ll figure it out.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Therese said, butterflies filling her stomach.

Dannie noticed their boss enter the bullpen. “Better get back to work. I want to know how it goes. Ok?” He winked at her as her got up and moved back to his desk.

“Ok,” Therese agreed. “Dannie, not a word to anyone.”

“Who would I tell? I get it, not a word,” he promised.

“Thanks.”

* * *

Carol and Abby had been working on their catalog all morning. Carol’s phone rang at exactly noon. She looked at the caller ID and saw it was Therese. She was nervous and excited all at the same time. Excusing herself, she went through the sliding glass door, out to the balcony.

“Hello, darling,” she answered affectionately.

“Hi,” Therese said nervously.

“Are you ok?” Carol asked.

“A little embarrassed and hungover, to be honest.”

“Embarrassed? Whatever for?”

“Um … our … um … _conversation_ last night. What you must think of me.”

“Therese, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. It was amazing. You’re amazing. In fact, I feel a little warm thinking about it,” Carol said, lowering her voice. She had already figured out that it drove Therese wild.

“Mmmm …” She paused, soaking in Carol’s response. “Me too. It was wonderful. I thought it was a dream,” Therese confessed.

“A dream? Oh darling, that was no dream. It was so sexy and as real as it gets. As real as the phone allowed anyway.” 

“Carol? Can I be honest with you?”

“Of course.” Carol felt uneasy, afraid Therese was going to dismiss her again.

“I’m still really confused. I didn’t mean to mislead you last night.”

“Are you saying you don’t want to move forward with this? With us?” Carol felt her chest tighten as she held her breath, waiting for Therese’s answer.

Therese could hear the sadness in Carol’s voice. “No, no. That’s not it at all.”

She wasn’t giving up on them. Carol took a deep breath. She felt a little better.

Therese continued, “I think we need to move slower. I can’t give myself to you while you’re married. I just can’t, Carol. I mean, I know last night might have given you a different impression.”

“I understand, but can we still see each other? Talk, hold hands, have dinner?” Carol said hopefully.

“I think we can. I’m not sure about holding hands. I’m not sure if I can handle you touching me. If I’m honest, I’m not sure I can handle you not touching me either.”

“Ok,” Carol said. She was disappointed, but they could take it at Therese’s pace. It was better than being shut out. “Why don’t you come over for dinner tonight? We can talk about how we move forward from here. I know Rindy would love to see you.”

“Ok. I would love to see her too, but no wine,” Therese said.

Carol laughed out loud. “All right, no wine. You would love to see _just_ Rindy?” Carol asked, transparently seeking assurance.

“No, I can’t wait to see _you_. Can we talk after Rindy goes to bed?”

“Yes, talking would be good. Can you come over after work?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll text you the address.”

“Great. Can I bring anything?”

“No, darling. Just yourself.”

“See you soon.”

“Yes, soon.” Carol ended the call. She was excited that Therese had agreed to come over for dinner. She had no idea where this was going. Were they a couple, or friends? At least Therese was willing to talk about it. She also had no idea how she was going to keep her hands to herself. She put her phone in her pocket and went back inside.

“Abby?! She’s coming for dinner!”


	9. Coherence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!  
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...

**Coherence:** : Listening term. Refers to how well sound is integrated, or the angular difference between two signals.

Therese left work at five. She probably should have stayed later, but she wanted to pick up a couple of gifts to take to Carol and Rindy. She stopped at a bookstore and found a children’s book about manatees that came with a little stuffed animal. The clerk wrapped it in a pink bag with some tissue paper. Then she found a flower shop near work. She got there just as the shopkeeper was closing the metal gates.

“Hello,” Therese said to the woman. “I was hoping to buy some flowers. Could you help me?”

“I’m just closing for the day,” she answered.

“I’m sorry, but they’re for someone very special to me. Is there any chance you could make just one more sale?”

“Very special? A fella?”

“Um … actually … no.” Therese’s cheeks colored.

“Sick grandmother?”

“No.” Therese’s blush deepened.

“Tell me child, don’t make me stand here guessing!” The woman sounded angry, but was smiling. “Come on, spit it out!”

“Um … a girlfriend. Well, maybe a girlfriend. Maybe not … I don’t really know,” Therese admitted to the stranger.

“Girlfriend, in the romantic sense?” she questioned.

“Yes,” Therese said shyly.

“Well! Why didn’t you say so? Come in, come in!” The woman opened the metal gate and invited Therese into her shop. “What kind of flowers were you thinking?”

“I hadn’t given it a whole lot of thought, to be honest.”

“Did you have a fight? Are you trying to get back on your lady’s good side?”

“No, nothing like that. It’s new, kind of a secret,” Therese admitted.

“I think I have just the thing. Daisies.” The woman smiled at her.

“Daisies? Why?”

“Daisies are a symbol for ‘loyal love’ and ‘I'll never tell’. My Helen brought me daisies when we were courting. Then every once in awhile over the years, to surprise me. Of course, that was back in the day when we had to keep quiet about being a couple. God, I loved that woman. We were together for forty-four years.” The woman stopped for a moment and closed her eyes. “I lost her two years ago.”

Therese put her hand on the woman’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“Thank you. If this one’s special, hang on to her.” The woman bowed her head for a moment, then lifted it again. “Now, where were we? Oh yes, daisies! I think it has to be daisies for your lady.”

Therese wondered if someone like Carol would like daisies. They weren’t fancy like roses or lilies, but the woman seemed determined to sell her daisies. How could she not buy them after her story and opening up the shop for her? The woman had gone in the back and Therese could hear her rustling around with something. She came back out with a large bunch of daisies nestled in a few wide ferns. They were wrapped in dark green paper and tied with a wide yellow ribbon.

“There now! What do you think?” the woman asked Therese.

“They’re lovely!” 

“I’m glad you like them. What was your name?”

“Therese.”

“Mine’s Elsie. Pleased to meet you, Therese. Now, go to your lady!” Elsie handed Therese the bunch of flowers and started to walk toward the entrance to the shop.

“It’s nice to meet you too. How much do I owe you?” Therese said, following the older woman.

“On the house. Come back and say hello sometime.” She smiled and opened the metal gate.

“Are you sure? I’m happy to …”

“No honey, thanks for letting me tell you about my Helen. Come back and tell me about your girl sometime.” She closed the gate behind Therese. “When it’s not a secret anymore.” She winked.

“Thank you. I won’t forget, Elsie.”

* * *

Carol had dinner all ready and warming. She just needed to dish it up when it was time. Rindy was in her room playing with her toys. She had just a few minutes to change her clothes and freshen up a bit. She wanted to look her best for Therese.

She walked into her closet and looked at her clothes. She decided on a pair of dark blue linen pants and a soft short sleeved, cream colored sweater. She turned in the full length mirror and thought she looked pretty good. Her feet were bare to be comfortable and casual. Next, she went in the bathroom. She sat at her vanity and put on a bit of mascara and some blush, then a light shade of lipstick. Her hair was down, so she ran a comb through it once. _Casual Carol, easy going, no fuss,_ she reminded herself.

She jumped when the phone rang. _Relax, Carol. Breathe._ She got up and answered it. 

“Hello.”

“Mrs. Aird? This is Taylor in the lobby. Miss Belivet is here to see you.”

“Thank you. Please send her up.”

“Have a good evening, Mrs. Aird.”

“Thanks, you too, Taylor.” 

She hung up. Her hands were shaking, she was so nervous. _Jesus, I have walked runways and posed for world famous photographers all over the damn world, and never been this nervous! Get it together, Carol!_ She went to the front door and opened it, waiting for the elevator to arrive. _Maybe I shouldn't be waiting out here?_ She went back in and closed the door, then looked through the peephole. _Or maybe I should be waiting for her. It’s more welcoming._ She heard the ding of the elevator and opened the door. 

Therese stepped out of the elevator and looked around, then she saw her. She stopped a few feet from Carol. Their eyes met and held. The awkwardness was back between them. Neither one knew quite how to be around the other after everything that had happened over the last few days.

“Hi,” Therese said nervously. _Damn, she looks good! Be strong, Therese – be strong!_ She desperately wanted to fall into Carol’s arms and feel her body against her own. _Slow down. She’s still married!_ she reminded herself.

“Hi,” Carol returned. _Can I hug her? Touch her at all? I better let her lead. Chill Carol, just fucking chill. But look at her, she’s beautiful! I can’t believe she’s here._

“I got these for you.” She offered Carol the daisies.

“I absolutely love daisies! They’re such happy flowers, like bringing sunshine in the house. Thank you, darling.” Their fingers brushed as Carol took the flowers from Therese. Their eyes locked at the touch.

Carol looked away and said, “I’m sorry, come inside.” Carol gestured toward the door. She lightly placed her hand on the small of Therese’s back as she entered the apartment, then abruptly pulled it back – not sure if her touch was welcome.

Therese entered the apartment and turned to wait for Carol as she shut and locked the door.

“Can I take your coat?” Carol asked. “You can set your purse and bag here if you like.” 

She pointed to a long table that was along the wall of the wide hallway. Therese set her purse and Rindy’s gift on the table, then put her camera bag on the floor underneath it. Carol set the flowers next to Therese’s purse and helped her out of her coat. She opened the hall closet and put her coat on one of the hangers, then closed the door. They stood looking at each other, both longing to touch the other. 

Therese reached for Carol’s hand. _Just one touch of her hand, one hug, I need to be in her arms for a few moments. I can control this ..._ The blonde took her hand and gently squeezed it. They each took a small step toward the other, then Therese moved into Carol. She wrapped her arms around her like she had in the park and tucked her nose into Carol’s neck. Her body melted into the taller woman, as she flattened her hands on her back. 

Carol wrapped one arm around Therese’s shoulders and gently wove her fingers into the dark hair at the back of her head. Her other arm circled around her lower back. She pulled her closer and pressed her cheek into Therese’s temple. She closed her eyes and breathed a sigh of relief.

“My angel …” Carol whispered.

“Carol …” Therese murmured.

They lost track of the time standing in the hallway holding tightly to one another. Neither woman wanted to let go. A kind of healing flowed between them. The red carpet shock and the TMZ video had hurt them both.

“Therese!” Rindy exclaimed as she ran toward them down the hall.

Reluctantly the women separated with their arms still around each other. Therese looked up into Carol’s eyes and smiled. She tightened her grip on Carol’s arms for a moment, then dropped her arms. She turned toward the child and knelt down.

“Hi, Rindy.”

“You got us flowers? They’re pretty!” the little girl said.

“I did. Do you see that pink bag?”

“Yes,” Rindy said, curious about the bag now.

“It’s for you.” Therese smiled at Rindy.

“What is it?”

“You need to open it and see.”

“Can I open it now?” She grinned at Therese.

“Of course.” Therese handed Rindy her gift. 

She sat down right in the middle of the hall and dug in the bag and brought out the book. “A book! I love books. I’m a Ma … what’s that word?” She held the book out to Therese.

“Manatee. There’s something else in there too.” She gestured at the bag the little blonde had set on the floor between them.

Rindy reached back in the bag and pulled out the little stuffed manatee. “Mommy, look! It goes with the book!” She showed the toy to her mother. “Thank you, Therese! I love it!”

“Should we go in and get ready for dinner? Maybe we can read your new book at bedtime?” Carol suggested.

“Yes!” Rindy took Therese’s hand and pulled her down the hall. Therese looked back at Carol and smiled.

Carol picked the flowers up and they all walked down the hall toward the main part of the apartment.

The wide hallway opened to a large room with a high ceiling and a wall of windows all along the far wall. Thick, dark grey mullions broke up the windows and two sliding glass doors opened to a balcony. The floors were dark brown wide wood planks. A large white stone wall was to the left. The stone was stacked in long thin horizontal pieces and had a slight texture. The wall had different sized niches recessed into it. Lighting from above grazed down the face and each niche had built-in lighting for the art pieces on display. A few niches were filled with hardback books and framed pictures. A long horizontal fireplace ran almost the full length of the wall about two feet off the floor. It had small pieces of broken glass all along the bottom of it and the blue and orange gas flames ran the entire length. There was an inset floating hearth made of dark reclaimed wood that ran the length of the wall just under the fireplace.

Centered on the stone wall was a large Impressionist painting. The scene was a rainy city street with people walking. You could almost see the misty rain. There were men in black suits with white shirts and other people in muted greens and beiges holding burnt-orange and black umbrellas. The focal point was the back of a shapely brunette. She wore a long sleeved, knee-length, white dress with a black trimmed ‘V’ neckline - the point of it almost down to what would be her bra line, exposing her bare back. She had black heels on her feet that accentuated her shapely calves and ankles. A black handbag was hanging from her bent arm that held a large white umbrella that matched her dress. Therese thought she was beautiful.

Two white, soft leather ‘L’ shaped couches sat across from each other - the length of them perpendicular to the fireplace. They sat far enough apart to walk between them. A large square glass coffee table was placed in the middle of them. There was a beautiful dark wood with white leather Eames chair and ottoman near the windows. A large, white, long shag rug covered the floor under the couches and ran almost all the way to the stone wall. Several burnt-orange and white patterned throw pillows in various sizes were on the couches and near the end of the coffee table on the rug.

To the right of the living room was a large wood and glass dining table with eight chairs and a chandelier with multiple glass pendants that ran along the length, above the table. Beyond the dining room was a big kitchen island with a glass range hood over the center and pendant lights on either side. Behind the island were white cabinets with fluted glass doors along the upper sections. The countertops and backsplash were smooth grey stone - the same color as the window mullions.

Carol had taken the flowers to the kitchen sink and put them in water. She had tied the ribbon around the neck of the clear glass vase and set them on the living room table.

“Carol, this room is beautiful! I love that painting. She’s gorgeous.”

“Thank you. The artist is Lorraine Christie. I’m lucky to have it.”

“You collect art?” Therese asked.

“Yes. Pieces that inspire me or make me feel good. Would you like something to drink?” Carol asked.

“No wine!” they both said in unison. They broke into a shared moment of nervous laughter.

“I have some sparkling water, iced tea, and maybe a diet soda or two,” Carol offered. “Oh, and some juice boxes, if you can get Rindy to share them.”

“Sparkling water would be great.”

“Yuck!” Rindy exclaimed.

“Yuck? Sparkling water is yuck?” Therese asked.

“Yes, I don’t like the bubbles, they tickle my nose.”

“I see. I think that’s the best part!” Therese said, reaching out and tickling the little girl's tummy.

“Therese?” Carol called from the kitchen.

“Yes?”

“Would you mind if we had dinner now? I like to make sure Rindy eats before seven.”

“Of course.”

“Great! Sweet pea, can you go wash your hands for dinner?”

“Ok Mommy,” Rindy answered, then disappeared down a hallway beyond the stone wall.

“Do you need any help?” Therese asked Carol.

“No, I think I’ve got it.” 

She came around the kitchen island with serving dishes and set them on the table. She went back around and brought out two serving bowls.

“Ok, I think that’s everything,” Carol said, surveying the meal to make sure she had everything.

Therese looked at the three place settings. One had a booster seat, so she figured that must be Rindy’s place. She assumed Carol sat at the head of the table next to her daughter.

“Should I sit here?” Therese put her hand on the back of the chair at the remaining place setting.

“Yes. Would you like anything more to drink with dinner?” Carol said as she came back around to the table. Therese had taken her place at the table. Carol reached around her to set the salad dressing on the table. Her arm had brushed Therese’s shoulder and she turned her head to look up at the tall blonde. Carol stopped as she set the bottle down. They were still as they gazed at each other.

“Gross! Are you guys going to stare at each other the whole time we’re eating?” Rindy asked. She pulled her chair out and climbed up into her booster seat.

“Sorry, snowflake,” Carol said as she averted her eyes from Therese’s. She went around and pushed Rindy’s chair in.

They enjoyed their dinner. All of them laughed and shared how their day had been. Rindy shared several ‘yucks’ and ‘grosses’ as the meal progressed. Carol and Therese only got caught staring twice. They all helped clear the table when they were finished.

“Why don’t you two go in the living room and I’ll get the dishes cleaned up.” Carol motioned for Therese and Rindy to get out of the kitchen.

“Are you sure? You cooked. We should clean up.” Therese put her arm around Rindy.

“No, no. It all goes in the dishwasher. I’ll only be a few minutes,” Carol insisted.

“Come on Therese, I’ll show you my room.” Rindy tugged on Therese’s hand.

“Ok.” Therese followed Rindy.

* * *

When Rindy and Therese returned to the living room, there was music playing and the lights had been dimmed. The fireplace was on and Carol was sitting on the couch with her iPad. Rindy ran and jumped on the couch next to her mother.

“You were in there a long time. I was about to come check on you two,” she said to Rindy.

“I had to show her my toys, Mommy,” she said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Carol looked up at Therese and smiled, checking to make sure she was ok. Therese grinned back at her and sat down at the end of the same couch.

“I met all of her stuffed animals. I hope I don’t have to remember all of their names. There’re so many!” She laughed.

“It’s true. She could start her own zoo, I think.” Carol squeezed Rindy.

“I have even more at Daddy’s house!” Rindy exclaimed.

Therese stiffened a little and the smile fell from her face at the mention of Carol’s husband. Carol caught it, but didn’t say anything.

“Snowflake, it’s getting late. How about you go put on your pajamas.”

“No, Mommy. It’s not late!” she argued.

“Sweet pea, let’s not argue in front of Therese. Please do as I asked.” 

“But Mommy …”

“Nerinda, please go put on your pajamas now. You can spend a little more time out here with us, but I want you ready for bed. I’ll come help you brush your teeth in a minute,” Carol said firmly.

“Ok,” Rindy said. She knew her mother meant business, so she went back to her room.

“Sorry about that, she doesn’t like to go to bed. I guess she thinks she’ll miss something,” Carol apologized.

“I never wanted to go to bed when I was a kid either.” Therese smiled, dimples deep in her cheeks.

“I’ll be right back.” Carol got up and went around the back of the couch. She lightly ran her fingers over Therese’s shoulders as she walked by.

Therese loved her gentle touch. She took a deep breath and stood up. She moved to the rug near the end of the coffee table and sat down to be closer to the fire. She watched the flames as she thought about the things she wanted to tell Carol. _How am I going to explain this to her so she understands why I want to slow down? This isn’t going to be easy._ She sighed and moved one of the pillows under her head as she lay down. 

She was running her fingers through the long soft pile of the rug when Rindy ran back into the room. She had on footy pajamas with Minions on them and had her new book and the stuffed manatee with her. She snuggled next to Therese and put her head on the same large pillow. Therese turned on her back and they looked at the book together. They talked about the pictures and pretended to be manatees as they read the pages. Carol returned to her spot on the couch and watched her two little manatees on the floor. She put her hand over her heart, surprised by her emotional response.

It had gotten very quiet on the floor. Carol leaned forward. Her girls had both fallen asleep. She moved to the end of the couch and looked at them. Therese was on her back and the little girl had snuggled in and had her head on Therese’s shoulder. The stuffed manatee was snug in the child’s bent arm and the book had fallen on the rug next to Rindy. Carol picked up the book and set it on the coffee table. She ran her hand along Therese’s arm that had wrapped around the little blonde. Therese slowly opened her eyes and stared into Carol’s. She couldn’t hide the affection she felt for the woman looking down at her. She could see the same mirrored back at her.

“Let me take her to bed,” Carol whispered as she picked up her daughter. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

The music still played, and the room was warm and cozy. Therese changed the large pillow for a smaller one, turned on her side and watched the fire. 

When Carol returned, she found Therese had fallen asleep again. She was resting on her side, facing the fireplace. Her arms were curled in front of her and one of her hands was under her cheek. She looked so peaceful, her face calm. Her dark lashes stood in stark contrast to her smooth pale skin. Carol picked up a pillow and set it on the floor near Therese. She got down on her knees and then mirrored Therese’s position - their knees and elbows almost touching.

Carol watched her sleeping for a few minutes, taking in the fine features of her beautiful face and neck. She reached out and gently ran her fingers over the smaller woman’s temple and cheek. When she repeated her caress, emerald green eyes fluttered open.

Therese found adoring blue eyes looking back at her. She took Carol’s hand and kissed her palm, then laced their fingers together and set their joined hands on the rug between them.

~ To be continued. ~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Living Room Painting  
> "My Complex Heart" by Artist: Lorraine Christie  
> link.  
> http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-TXlbVaVWTVg/Udlom8LVKtI/AAAAAAACwLE/mG1jMiajYVE/s1600/Lorraine+Christie+-+Tutt%27Art@+(42).jpg


	10. Binaural

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Posting Ch. 10 a day after Ch. 9!**   
>  **Make sure you didn't miss it! ^.^**
> 
> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!  
> This was supposed to be a one shot, but Ligeria wasn't having any of that! Soooo...

**Binaural:** A situation involving listening with two ears.

Therese found adoring blue eyes looking back at her. She took Carol’s hand, kissed her palm, then laced their fingers together and set their joined hands on the rug between them.

“I’m sorry. I guess I fell asleep,” Therese said.

“You looked so peaceful, I’m sorry I woke you. My fingers seemed to have a mind of their own,” Carol said quietly. “You asked if we could talk after Rindy went to bed. Are you too tired? Do you still want to?”

“Yes, do you?”

“Yes. I can answer any questions you have about the divorce, or anything else.”

“I do have questions about the divorce, but I wanted to share some things first. It might help you understand my hesitation.”

Carol squeezed her hand and said, “Tell me.”

“I want you to know it’s really not you … it’s me.”

“Ok,” Carol said softly.

Therese was quiet for a few moments, then she started to tell Carol about her past. “I’ve only had one serious relationship. I dated men before her, but I never understood why none of them made me feel what I thought love should be. I liked them, but no one made my heart beat faster or feel that ‘I can’t live without you’ feeling.” She took a few moments. “I thought maybe it had to do with my father passing when I was so young. Maybe I couldn’t let myself get attached to a man for fear they would leave me too. I don’t know.”

“You were so young when you lost him. Just a little bit older than Rindy is now.” Carol squeezed their joined hands.

“Yes, six is a tough age to lose a parent. I really loved him.”

“I’m sorry.” Carol lifted their hands and held the back of Therese’s hand to her cheek, then kissed it and set their joined hands back down between them.

Therese gave her a little smile and said, “Thanks. I know now that it had less to do with losing him and more to do with the fact that they weren’t women.” She smiled at Carol, then took a deep breath and went on. “I met her during my first semester at Grad School. I was in the library and she sat down across from me. She had red hair and hazel eyes, long lashes and a beautiful smile. She flirted with me over our books and laptops. I honestly didn’t understand at the time that she had romantic intentions. We sat at the same table a couple of nights later, but on the third night, she sat next to me. I guess since I wasn’t getting it, she decided to get a little bold with her hands. Needless to say, it became very clear that she didn’t want to just share a library table.” She laughed nervously, then stopped for a moment. 

Carol stayed quiet, sensing Therese needed to get through her emotions to go on.

“Anyway, to make a long story short, we started dating and it didn’t take long for me to fall madly in love with her. We had a whirlwind romance. I’d never been happier. I finally knew what love felt like. Six months in, she started coming up with excuses why she couldn’t see me as often. She stopped staying over and didn’t invite me to her house either. I just thought she was busy. One afternoon she left her phone at my apartment, so I took it to her house to return it. A man answered the door and I heard her call from the kitchen asking who was there. That was the night I found out she was married. Her husband had been relocated out of town for work, so she was free to play me. He’d moved back and that’s why things changed. My heart was broken. She came to my apartment the next day and promised me she was leaving him. She didn’t love him anymore and we would be together.” 

She stopped and wiped a tear from her eye. Carol got up and got a small box of tissues for her. She laid back down and moved a little closer. She ran her hand down her arm and then put her hand back on the rug. Therese wiped her eyes and put the tissue in her pocket, then took Carol’s hand again.

“Like a fool, I believed her. She strung me along for another two months, even told me she had filed for divorce. One night after we’d made love, which I guess was just sex for her, she finally admitted she hadn’t filed and she had reconciled with her husband. She couldn’t see me anymore. I still loved her; my heart was shattered. I’d never experienced a break-up that mattered before. I fell into a deep depression: I couldn’t eat, I lost weight and felt sick to my stomach all the time, I slept away all my days off, I wouldn’t talk to anyone, I went to work, and barely kept up with my studies and projects. I was a zombie for months.” She took the tissue out of her pocket and wiped her eyes again. 

Carol reached to the box and got her another tissue. She wanted to take Therese in her arms and never let her go, but she kept her distance. Her understanding of Therese’s reticence to get involved with her had become more clear.

“Thanks,” Therese said, as she wiped her eyes again with the fresh tissue. She tucked it in her pocket and took Carol’s hand again. 

“Do you still love her?” Carol asked.

“No, but I don’t ever want to go through that again. The heartbreak was terrible, but the lies were the most unforgivable. When I saw you with your husband on that damned red carpet, I felt my heart constrict in my chest. It was hard to breathe. I couldn’t even stand – I had to sit down. It was happening again. The photographer next to me told me who you were, and how you were happily married and had the cutest little girl. I really had never heard of Carolyn Ross.” She sniffed and wiped her eyes again.

“Carol, I was drawn to you the minute our eyes met in the park. Then I got to know you a bit more and I couldn’t believe my luck. You were everything I wanted, warm, intelligent, kind …” Her cheeks colored as she continued, “Tall, gorgeous, sexy, and the physical attraction between us …” She reached over and touched Carol’s cheek, then ran her fingers over her jaw to the tiny cleft in her chin, then down her neck and rested it on her shoulder. She caressed her collarbone with her thumb.

“The first time you took me in your arms, I was light headed and a little breathless. I felt turned on and safe all at the same time. I’ve never felt that before, and then you kissed me and … I can’t even describe how amazing it was kissing you. Then it was all still there at lunch the next day, and after our … um … _conversation_ last night … I know I had too much wine, but I remember it all - every word and feeling. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted in a lover and partner.”

Both women’s heads were still on the pillows as they looked at each other. Carol reached over and threaded her fingers through Therese’s hair. She sifted through it several times. Therese closed her eyes and her lips curved in just the slightest smile.

Therese opened her eyes and said, “I can’t tell you how much I want to be in your arms, kissing you and more, but you’re still married and I can’t do that again.” She paused and whispered, “I’m so attracted to you ... it scares me.”

Carol was still running her fingers through Therese’s hair. She wasn’t sure if she should speak, but she wanted to ease Therese’s fears.

“I don’t want you to be scared. I would never hurt you intentionally. I realize that may be hard for you to believe right now. I can show you the divorce papers in progress. They should be signed within the next month. I told Harge before that event that I would be announcing our split next week with or without him. You’ve given me the fire I needed to push him and quit bowing to his excuses. I won’t accept waiting any longer.”

“Carol, I want to believe you. I really do, but my fear is real and I can’t ignore it.”

“I understand now. You have good reason to be wary, but this situation is different. My marriage was over years ago – there will never be a reconciliation. I want to be with you, Therese.” She threaded her fingers into the hair at the nape of Therese’s neck and stroked under her ear with her thumb. “If that means slowing down, I’m fine with that. We can take it as slow as you need to, or until you’re comfortable and the divorce papers are signed.”

“Ok, slowing down would be good,” Therese agreed.

“I want to hold you so badly right now. Can we compromise? Let me hold you. I promise nothing more will happen. Please?” Carol asked.

Therese could see the honesty in Carol’s eyes. She warred with herself. Her need to be closer to Carol finally won over her fear. She sat up and moved closer. Carol took Therese into her arms and held her close. Therese’s arms were bent between them and her hands were on Carol’s chest. Her nose was tucked into the blonde’s neck. One of Therese’s legs moved between Carol’s, as the blonde bent her knee and pulled her closer.

“Is this ok?” Carol asked.

“Yes, I wanted this too.”

“Can we agree on one thing? I mean besides slowing down,” Carol asked.

Therese lifted her head and looked at Carol. “What would that be?”

“Can we agree to be exclusive? I can’t bear the thought of you with someone else. I know that’s unfair, and a lot to ask since I’m the one technically still tangled in divorce. I know you’re not bound to me in any way right now.”

Therese saw hurt in Carol’s eyes and on her face. “Carol, I am bound to you. When I said ‘you never had me’, it wasn’t true. I know this is a corny movie line, but you had me at hello. I can’t imagine seeing anyone else right now.”

“So it’s a deal? We won’t see anyone else until we figure us out?”

“Yes. Pinky swear?” Therese leaned back a little bit and held her pinky up.

“I don’t know, I promised I wouldn’t do anything more than hold you,” Carol teased.

“Carol!”

“Ok, ok!” She held her pinky up and they curled them around each other. Carol pulled them toward her lips and kissed them. Then Therese pulled them to her lips and kissed them too.

Therese moved her arm over Carol’s waist and pulled her close again. “What about Carolyn Ross?” Therese asked. “I don’t have any idea how that part of your life works, or how I might fit in.”

“I suppose that is the most complicated part of us being together. I want to live honestly and open, but I’m still not sure I can yet. There may be morality clauses in my current contracts that forbid it. What about you? Do you want to be seen openly with me? I mean as a couple? I’m not a big celebrity anymore, but a lot of people still know who I am. It can be like living in a fishbowl at times. It’s part of the territory, but sometimes it’s hard. Unfortunately, with TMZ sniffing around, it’s rough right now. It will probably get worse with the divorce announcement.”

“I guess I’m more concerned about living with that kind of public attention. I can only assume that if you come out as a lesbian, it will be big news,” Therese said.

“I would assume that as well. I need to tell my agent soon, and probably hire a PR person that has some expertise in helping celebrities come out.”

“You don’t have to be out on my account. It could ruin your career, right?”

“It could, but I don’t want to hide you. Assuming we pursue a future together. Sneaking around, trying to avoid TMZ and those like them, sounds miserable. Once they get a hint of it, they won’t leave us alone. If I can come out on my terms, it won’t be as interesting to them. All the salaciousness will be taken out of the equation.”

“This is all new to me. I don’t know much about celebrity life. I didn’t even know I had been kissing _the one and only_ Carolyn Ross!” She laughed.

“You sure you don’t want to kiss her again?” Carol lifted an eyebrow.

“Temptress. Besides, I can’t. I’ve promised to be exclusive with another woman.”

Carol laughed and pulled Therese even closer. They stayed there in each other’s arms and listened to the music. Therese started to get sleepy again.

“I should probably go home,” Therese said as she yawned. “I have to work tomorrow.”

“Do you feel a little better about us?”

“Yes, much better.”

The women sat up. Carol got up first and offered Therese her hand. She took it and stood.

“I’m just going to use the bathroom, then I’ll go.”

“I’ll have the lobby call you a cab.”

“Ok. Thanks.”

They came back together in the living room and walked down the wide hallway, arm in arm, toward the door.

“I’m sorry I can’t see you to the door downstairs,” Carol apologized.

“That’s ok. I wouldn’t want you to leave Rindy. Thank you for a wonderful meal and everything else.”

“Thank you for the daisies and Rindy’s gifts.”

They were awkward for a moment then moved into each other’s arms. They rocked back and forth a little, as they held onto one another.

“Carol?”

“Hmmm?”

“Do you think … “ She leaned back, still in Carol’s arms. “Um, do you think we can amend our slow down plan?”

“What do you have in mind?”

Therese stood on her tiptoes and kissed Carol. The taller woman bent her head and kissed her back. The kiss was slow and measured, but filled with promise.

“I like this amendment.” Carol kissed her again.

“A limited amendment to include goodbye kisses only …” She pulled Carol’s head down and captured her lips with her own again. When the kiss started to get heated, Therese pulled away. She cupped Carol’s cheeks with her hands and kissed her one more time, then stepped away from her.

“That might be a bad idea,” Therese said, as she put her fingers over her lips and tried to calm her racing heart.

Carol leaned over and whispered in Therese’s ear, “No, I think it’s a very good idea.” She kissed her neck behind her ear before moving to the hall closet to get her coat.

Carol helped her into her coat. Therese picked up her camera bag and purse, then opened the door. Carol went out to the elevator with her. 

“Will you text me when you get home?”

“Ok.”

The elevator arrived and the door opened. Carol kissed Therese one more time and said, “Goodnight, angel.”

“Goodnight.”

* * *

The doorman opened the door for Therese and said, “Your cab is right out front. Have a good night.”

She could see the cabbie leaning against the car smoking. She walked out the door and he tossed his cigarette to the ground and put it out with his shoe. The next thing she knew flashes were going off and several men with cameras were yelling at her.

“Ms. Belivet, were you here with Ms. Ross?” one yelled at her. 

“Are you having an affair with Carolyn Ross?” another shouted.

“Ms. Belivet, can you tell us if you’re seeing Ms. Ross romantically?”

The flashes continued. The doorman had come out and was trying to shield Therese from the photographers as the cabbie opened the back door and helped her in. He shut the door and ran around to the driver’s door.

“Holy crap!” the cabbie said, as he pulled away from the curb. “Where did they come from?” 

“I don’t know. Can you please take me home?” Therese was in shock, but managed to give him her address.


	11. Free Field

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!

**Free Field:** An environment in which a sound wave may propagate in all directions without obstructions or reflections. 

 

Therese was shaking and she felt cold. She pulled her coat around herself and slid down in the back seat of the cab. She sat up and looked out the back window several times – trying to see if they were being followed. The cabbie looked at her in the rear view mirror.

“Are you ok, ma’am?” he asked.

“Not really. Can you hurry, please.” Therese looked out the back window again. “Is anyone following us?”

“I don’t think so,” he said as he looked in his mirrors.

Therese knew she needed to call Carol, but she didn’t want to talk to her with the driver listening. After what seemed a lifetime the cab pulled up in front of her building. She paid the driver and stepped out onto the sidewalk. She noticed a dark colored sedan pull up to the curb a few yards away. The streetlight above the car lit up a thin faced man with slicked back, dark hair. He sat in the passenger seat and watched her through wire frame glasses. She had a moment of panic. Should she go inside or get back in the cab. She supposed if this man had followed her, he now knew where she lived. 

She stood still and stared at him. A smile slowly spread across his face. His shark white teeth were shining in the light from above. She shivered, then turned and ran to the front door. She took the stairs two at a time up to her floor. Once she was safely in her apartment, Therese dropped her bags, took off her shoes and curled up on her bed. She hadn’t even taken her coat off. She pulled up the blanket on the end of the bed and wrapped it around herself.

Her mind was racing. _They know my name and they took pictures of me outside Carol’s apartment building. What were they asking? If we were a couple? If we were having an affair? How did they know?!_ She was almost sure she recognized the man in the car outside her building. He was one of the men yelling questions at her. The cabbie had been watching behind them and she had looked herself several times. _How had he followed us without being noticed? Was he a TMZ reporter? Is that why I recognize him? Was he the reporter on the video? I need to call Carol. I’m not sure I have this in me. Is this what it’s going to be like? Being with her? Hiding from the paparazzi? Always looking over my shoulder? Did I do the right thing, coming home? Should I have gone back inside her building? Is she going to be mad at me? I don’t know, I honestly don’t know._

Half an hour later, she’d stopped shaking and had calmed down a bit. She decided to make herself a cup of tea and call Carol. She got up and took her coat off, then tossed it over the chair in the living room and dug her phone out of her bag. Therese went in the kitchen and put some water in the kettle and put it on the stove. She got a mug and picked out a tea bag from several boxes in her pantry. There was a note from her roommate on the table, saying she wouldn’t be home the next two nights. Therese was slightly disappointed, preferring not to be alone in the apartment for the night. On the other hand, she also valued the privacy to talk to Carol. She went back in the living room and sat on the couch. She noticed she had missed a text from Carol.

_Thank you for a wonderful evening. Make it home ok? xo-C_

_Home. You still awake? Call me. Now? -T_

The kettle whistled, so she went back into the kitchen and poured the water for her tea. As she sat back on the couch, her phone vibrated and the picture of Carol and Rindy lit up the screen.

“Carol?” Therese answered, trying to mask the anxiety she still felt.

“What’s wrong, darling? Are you ok? Your message worried me.” Carol’s voice was filled with concern.

“I’m ok now.”

“What do you mean, ‘now’? Did something happen on your way home?”

“There were photographers outside your building. They took pictures of me and were yelling questions.”

“Oh my angel, I’m so sorry! Are you sure you’re ok? How did they know you were even here?” questioning the situation more than Therese.

“I don’t know. I didn’t tell anyone where I was going. Not even Dannie.”

“Can you tell me what kinds of questions they were asking?” Carol felt a sharp pain behind her right eye. She moved to the side of her bed and sat down.

“I don’t remember exactly. I was too shocked that they were there, and the flashes were in my eyes. The questions seemed to be related to us being a couple, having an affair, that kind of thing. I didn’t say a word.” She paused. “Carol … they know my name. I’m pretty sure they followed me home. The cabbie was watching, but somehow he didn’t see them. I think I recognized one of them.”

Carol said quietly, “Darling, I’m so sorry. How can I make it better?”

Therese felt some of the panic returning. Her stomach was churning. “I think it was the guy from the TMZ video. You don’t need to do anything for me, I’ll be ok, but what about you? What does this mean?”

“It means they are going to keep digging. They’ll probably keep bothering you.” Carol sighed deeply. “God, I’m sorry, Therese.”

Therese could hear a tightness in Carol’s voice. Not that her apology wasn’t sincere, just an underlying tension. “You don’t have to be sorry. I didn’t say anything, so they’re still guessing. Right?”

“Yes, but they will keep trying. I’ll find out how they knew you were here,” Carol said. “There may be another video, and maybe pictures tomorrow. They’ll print your name – possibly even say it on TV. They have no care if it turns your life upside down. I expect it for me, but I never wanted it to happen to you, my angel.” Therese was quiet. Carol said, “Therese?”

“Yes?”

“I hope this doesn’t change your mind about me,” Carol said, defeated. She was sure that the younger woman would be done with her. Any chance for a relationship was doomed by the paparazzi and her remaining celebrity. There was silence on the line for a moment. Carol was sure she had lost Therese. Why would she want her life disrupted like this ... for her? Therese’s friends, family, and coworkers questioning her involvement with a ‘straight’ married woman. She put the phone on speaker, set it on her knees and held her aching head in her hands. The sudden onset of pain behind both eyes now made it hard to focus. She hadn’t realized how much losing her would hurt until that moment. 

“No,” Therese said softly. A calm had come over her. “It doesn’t change how I feel about you.”

Carol felt tears of relief at the corners of her eyes. “Really?” she said, uncertainly.

“Yes.” Therese smiled for the first time since she had left the tall blonde. “Carol, everything we talked about tonight is still true. What’s between us is what matters to me. I don’t want these vultures to ruin us before we are ‘us’. I won’t pretend I know how to move forward from here. Maybe we should stop seeing each other? I mean … until this blows over.”

“Darling … “ Carol’s tears flowed unchecked now. She knew she was falling in love with her and she would do whatever it took to take her life back so she and Therese could be together.

“Are you crying?” Therese asked. “Don’t cry, I can’t stand the idea of you crying alone.”

“I was so sure this would change your mind. You would be running for the hills away from me.” Carol laughed through her tears. “These are tears of relief, my angel. Thank you.”

“You don’t need to thank me …” She wanted to say more, but she was scared of her feelings for Carol.

“It’s late. We should try to get some sleep. I’m sorry those jackals ambushed you tonight, darling. Let me know if they bother you in the morning, ok?”

“Ok. Carol?”

“Yes?”

“It was worth it.”

“What was worth it?”

“Dealing with the ‘jackals’. I wouldn’t have missed spending the evening with you and Rindy. Talking, holding each other, and kissing you goodnight were all worth it.”

“Oh darling, I hope so. Tonight was wonderful. I know Rindy adores you … and I loved all those things too. Especially that last part.”

“Good night, Carol.”

“Good night, my angel.”

* * *

The next morning, Carol called the manager of the building and asked him to come up to her apartment. He was more than happy to accommodate one of his penthouse residents. She told him that a friend of hers had been accosted outside the lobby doors by paparazzi and wondered if there was any video of the street outside the building. He said he had video of both the street and the lobby. Carol asked him if he would look for anything or anyone that might be suspicious. She didn’t appreciate having her guests assaulted with cameras near the building. He promised he would investigate when he returned to his office and let her know.

Later that morning, Carol got a phone call from the manager asking her to come down to the office. As luck would have it, her cleaning lady was there and offered to watch Rindy while she went downstairs.

“Mrs. Aird. Thank you for coming down so quickly,” the manager said. “I’m sorry to report that I think I found something that disturbs me greatly. I apologize in advance.”

“What have you discovered?” Carol was anxious to know.

“I’m not sure but I think our new hire, Taylor, may not have adhered to our strict privacy rules. Can I show you this video? Maybe you can fill in some blanks for me?” he asked.

“Yes, of course.”

“I took the liberty of checking our phone log. The desk clerk writes down the guests of our residents as they enter the building. Taylor logged in your friend Miss Belivet just after six-fifteen. I went to the lobby video and found footage of Taylor making a cell phone call right after she went up to your apartment, which is against our policy. I didn’t think much of it, until not long after his call a tall thin man with glasses came into the lobby and had a conversation with him. Taylor wrote something down and handed it to the man. Then the man gave him something from his wallet, maybe a card or money, I don’t know for sure. The film as you can see isn’t the best quality. The man disappeared outside right after. I was able to catch this still shot of him, so I printed it out for you. Do you know him?”

Carol looked at the picture. She didn’t recognize him. “Do you have footage of the street when my friend left?” she asked.

“I looked through the remaining tape for the evening and found what I think you’re looking for here.”

He played a few minutes of video. Carol could see the doorman holding the door as a couple entered the building, then she saw him speaking to Therese. All of the sudden, there were three men surrounding her. Flashes blinded the building’s camera, but she could see Therese holding her hands up between flashes and running for the cab. The doorman was trying to shield her, but not having much luck. She noticed the man from the picture she held in her hands. She pointed him out to the manager.

“Is that the same man?” Carol asked.

“Yes, that certainly seems to be the same man,” he said disappointedly. “It looks like Taylor might have called him and tipped him off about your friend. I’m sorry, Mrs. Aird. We pride ourselves on the complete privacy of our residents. I’ll open an investigation with our HR firm right away. In the meantime, I will relieve Taylor of his front desk duties until we can find out who this man is and if there has been any wrongdoing.”

“Thank you. When I moved into the building, I was assured privacy was of utmost concern for the residents. I count on it,” she reminded the manager.

“Of course, Mrs. Aird. I will get to the bottom of this as soon as possible.”

Carol went back upstairs, got her iPad and sat on the couch. She navigated to the TMZ website and searched her name. Several videos came up, most of fashion week in New York and Paris. The most current ones were her concern. One was from a few months ago at some event she had attended with Harge. She ignored that one and moved to the next one. It was of the red carpet night with Therese. She hit the play button and saw the host call to one of his reporters.

“Tommy. What have you got?” Harvey asked.

She paused it for a moment. Tommy was tall and thin, with slicked back dark hair and wire rimmed glasses. He was the man in the picture the manager had given her. She hit play again and saw herself falter on the red carpet. The video flashed to still shots of Therese sitting behind the ropes crying and the pained look between them. One flashed to her face, and then another a side view of Therese. The video rolled more of her with her hand on the sponsor wall and then showed two more stills of the PA Claire talking with Therese and then herself. They then flashed to video of her dismissing Harge and her steeling herself against the wall while talking to Claire. Tommy was blathering on, speculating about her relationship with her husband and the looks between herself and the unknown photographer.

Carol was afraid to look at the third video. It was a teaser for that evening’s episode and had a rehash of the previous video, and then stills of Therese coming out of her building. The voiceover on the video identified himself as Tommy Tucker. He went on about Carolyn Ross having a secret lesbian affair with a photographer named Therese Belivet. He pronounced her name wrong, but he had still said it close enough. The video then flashed a picture of Harge, and Tommy suggesting trouble in paradise.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Carol said under her breath. She didn’t want Rindy to hear her. “Trouble In fucking paradise? Seriously?” she said out loud to herself. Had they forgotten they had video and pictures of Harge ‘cheating’ on her just a few months ago? They hadn’t mentioned where Therese lived or shown any pictures of her building. Nor did they seem to know where she worked. Maybe they hadn’t figured it out yet or it wasn’t important to them. Carol knew she needed to call Therese and tell her what she’d found. She decided to wait, not wanting to upset her at work.

* * *

The manager called late that afternoon and informed Carol that Taylor had folded like a cheap suit when they questioned him. Mr. Tucker had been in the day before and given Taylor his card. He showed him a picture of the woman in question and told him he would give him a hundred bucks for her name and a call should she show up. So when Miss Belivet arrived, Taylor called him. Mr. Tucker offered him another forty if he called them again when she was leaving. Which he did, right before he called for Miss Belivet’s taxi. That’s how Mr. Tucker and his crew knew to hide just out of the doorman’s view and wait for your friend to exit the building.

Carol was furious. She tried to calm herself down, She ran on her treadmill for forty-five minutes to try and burn off her anger, then took a shower. She made a quick dinner for she and Rindy. Then they played a board game at the little table in Rindy’s room. After she was asleep, Carol poured herself a stiff drink and called Therese to fill her in. Therese picked up on the second ring. She listened as Carol told her what had happened and how they knew she was in the building visiting her. She also warned her about the TMZ teaser for that night’s episode.

“What do we do now?” Therese asked.

“I need to call my agent and tell her. Talk to my lawyer about morality clauses and then, I suppose, I’ll need to hire a specialized PR person right away. I don’t know if I should announce the divorce or wait until I consult with the PR person. I honestly haven’t been in this situation with the press. The worst thing that has ever happened was pictures of Harge with his mistress. They still don’t really have any proof of anything to do with us. It’s all speculation at this point.”

“What if they show up at my apartment again, or work?” Therese asked. Carol could hear the apprehension in her voice.

“Can you do the same? Ignore them? Not say anything?” Carol felt awful asking this of her. Therese wasn’t a celebrity and she knew how aggressive the paparazzi could be.

“I guess so. Not speaking to them or answering questions is easy. I didn’t like them getting so close to me - touching me,” Therese admitted.

“Do you want me to hire someone? Security for you? They have no right to touch you.”

“No. I just didn’t like it.”

“Are you sure you want to deal with all this?”

“No, but I still want to explore ‘us’. How do we do that with paparazzi breathing down our necks?”

“I have a few tricks up my sleeve,” Carol assured her.

“I wish I would have just stayed with you. I felt so warm and safe in your arms,” Therese admitted.

“Therese, you can always stay. It doesn’t mean we have to … um … well … become more physical than you're comfortable with, darling. I mean, I have a guest room. I wasn’t assuming you would sleep with me, or that we would …”

“Carol,” Therese interrupted. “I’m starting to think maybe my fears are pretty silly about you still being married. You’re right that this is very different than my experience before. _You_ are very different. I already feel …” Therese stopped, unsure if she wanted to admit how deep her feelings already were for Carol.

“Therese … I don’t want you to rush into this if you’re uncomfortable. I don’t want anything to derail our chance to be together.” Repeating Therese’s words back to her, she continued, “I already feel so much for you. I’m inexplicably drawn to you, and not just physically. Although, after our _conversation_ the other night, I am pretty sure that we’ll be … well … I haven’t forgotten how amazing it was with us.” She paused, unsure if she should say what was in her heart. Her voice was shaky as she said, “Therese … when you were sleeping in front of the fire, as I looked at you and caressed your face, I realized … I think I’m falling in love with you.” She held her fingers over her lips, not to take the words back, but afraid she would say more.

Therese felt an ache in her chest and she held her breath as she listened to Carol. She knew she felt the same. She could feel the fear fighting back, then start to crumble as Carol was dismantling the wall around her heart with her words. She could hear the honesty and affection in her admission. She tried to find her voice to respond, but all she could manage was a whisper into the phone. “Oh Carol …” She held her hand over her chest, overwhelmed with emotion.

After an extended silence, Carol said, “You don’t have to say anything more ...”

Therese’s composure returned and she interrupted Carol, “I wish you knew what you do to me, Carol. I wish you could feel the way my heartbeat accelerates at just the thought of you. I wish you knew how many times I have revisited our _conversation_ in my head. I wish I could explain how afraid I am … because ... I feel the same, except ...“ she paused and said softly, “I _know_ I’m falling in love with you.”

Carol felt a tear at the corner of her eye and a smile take over her face. Her heart soared as Therese’s soft voice said those words she longed to hear. “My angel, how I want to be with you and hold you right now.”

“I would like that too. When can I see you again?” 

“I’m not sure, darling. We’re going to have to be careful for a while, until that TMZ reporter finds something else more interesting.” 

“I really don’t like him,” Therese said angrily. 

“Me either,” Carol agreed. 

“Are you sure we shouldn’t stop seeing each other? Just until you can figure out the best thing to do for your career and your life?” 

“ _You_ are the best thing for my life. I’m just not sure if I’m the best thing for yours.”


	12. Articulation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!

**Articulation:** A quantitative measure of the intelligibility of speech; the percentage of speech items correctly perceived and recorded.

 

When Carol finished her call with Therese, she went out on the balcony and had a cigarette. As she took a long drag, she thought about what she would say to her agent. Marg had represented her since she was eighteen. Her mother had been against changing agents, but Carol had thought it a step toward controlling her own independence. Marg worked for Carol, not her mother as her previous agent had. He had been fine, but Marg had always had Carol’s best interests at heart, often not in line with what her mother had wanted. She finished her cigarette and stepped back inside. She took a deep breath and called Marg’s number.

“Carolyn!” Marg answered on the first ring. “Where are you, love?”

“I’m at home. Are you back in New York yet?” Carol asked as she sat in the chair by the fireplace.

“Yes. I flew in this morning. I’ve been going to call you. I talked with Annie’s people this afternoon.”

“Annie’s people?”

“You haven’t forgotten about your PSA shoot with her, have you?”

“Shit. Yes. When is it again?” Carol pinched the bridge of her nose. She didn’t really feel like working right now.

“Wednesday afternoon. I don’t think she can postpone it.”

“No, no, it’s fine. It will be good to work with her again. It’s been a couple of years.”

“This PSA is important – it’s a good cause.”

“I know. I really want to do it. I booked the ‘glam squad’ when we agreed to do it. I’d just forgotten about it.”

“Carol, that’s not like you. Are you ok?”

“Yes, yes. Fine. I have a lot on my mind right now.”

“Ok, if you’re sure you’re ok. I’ll make time to stop by and say ‘Hi’ to Annie and see that everything is going well.”

“Marg?” Carol said with a slight hesitation.

“Yes, love?”

“I know tomorrow is Saturday, and you must be exhausted from your trip, but would you have time to stop by the apartment in the morning. Have a cup of coffee and talk?”

“Let me look at my schedule.” She paused. “I have a lunch appointment, but I’m free all morning.”

“Can you come around nine?”

“I can. Are you sure you’re all right?” she asked Carol, genuinely concerned.

“Yes … and no. We can talk tomorrow.”

“We can talk now if you’d like to,” Marg offered.

“No, I’d rather talk in person this time.”

“All right. It’s not your health, is it?” Marg asked, worried.

“No, no. I’m healthy as ever,” Carol reassured her.

“Ok then, I’ll see you tomorrow morning. Good night, love.”

“Night Marg, and thanks.”

“Anytime. You know you’re my favorite,” Marg said affectionately.

“I know.” Carol chuckled, feeling a little better, even though Marg always told her that before she ended their calls.

* * *

Rindy woke her mother with enthusiastic bouncing on the bed at six-thirty. She usually came in at six in the dot. Carol’s thoughts about what she would say to Marg had kept her awake until just after midnight, so she was grateful for the extra half hour of sleep. The two had fallen into this morning routine as soon as Carol had moved to their apartment. Rindy seemed to need more of her attention and physical contact since she had moved to her own place. She wondered if Harge was experiencing the same thing. She realized they should probably talk about things like that regarding their daughter, but they hadn’t done much more than argue lately.

“Mommy! Is it swimming day with Aunt Abby?”

“Yes sweet pea, it is swimming day! We should call Aunt Abby in a little while to see if she’s remembered.”

“Why would she forget?”

“I’m sure she hasn’t, sweetheart.” _Unless that redhead of hers has kept her up all night! I’ll let Rindy call her in an hour, that should give her enough time to untangle herself!_ Carol laughed.

“What’s funny, Mommy?” Rindy asked with a puzzled look on her face.

“You are, my little fish!” Carol grabbed her daughter and began tickling her tummy and ribs.

“Mommy!” Rindy giggled and tried to tickle her mother back, then wiggled away as Carol blew a raspberry on the bottom of her foot. Rindy squealed in response and almost kicked her mother in the nose.

A few minutes later, after a truce and a snuggle, they got up to start their day.

* * *

Abby knocked on the door and let herself in just before nine o'clock.

“Tadpole? Where’s my little tadpole?!” she yelled down the hall.

“Aunt Abby!” Rindy called as she ran down the hall to hug her godmother.

Abby scooped her up and spun in a circle as she hugged the little blonde. “Ready to go swimming? Your coach will be so excited to see us. It’s been two weeks!”

“I’m excited to see her! What is she going to teach me today?”

“I’m not sure, but we better go or we’ll be late.” She set the child back on her feet and said, “Get your stuff.”

“Ok!” Rindy said as she dashed back down the hallway toward her room.

“Carol?”

“Here, in the kitchen.”

“Morning,” Abby said as she gave Carol a quick hug and a peck on her cheek.

“You sure you’re up for swimming this morning? You sounded tired earlier.” Carol winked at her best friend.

“Don’t you even. I left Sami very early so I could pick up _your_ daughter for her swim lesson.”

“Hey, don’t blame me. You’re the one that wanted to have a bonding experience with your godchild. Then let her pick what it would be!” Carol laughed at Abby. “Do you even know how to swim?”

“I can dog paddle with the best of them! Besides, her coach is cute.”

“I thought you were trying to be exclusive this time?”

“Yes, I’m with Sami, but I’m not dead! I can still look.” She stuck her tongue out at Carol and turned to go find Rindy.

Another knock sounded from the front door. Carol put the last breakfast dish in the dishwasher, dried her hands and went to answer the door.

“Hello, love,” Marg said as she leaned in and kissed both of Carol’s cheeks, then gave her a tight hug. 

“Hi, thanks for coming by.”

“Of course. It’s good to see you.”

“Auntie Marg!” Rindy called as she ran to hug the agent’s legs.

“Rindy. How are you, honey?” Marg wrapped an arm around the little girl and hugged her.

“Good. I’m going swimming!” The little girl looked up, excitement in her big blue eyes.

“That sounds like fun,” Marg said as she ran her fingers through Rindy’s hair, pushing it away from her face.

Abby came around the corner with Rindy's swim bag. She met Marg and they kissed on both cheeks. “Marg, it’s been forever. How are you?”

“Good, great to see you Abby.”

“We’re just leaving. This little tadpole has an appointment with the pool.” Abby put her arm around Rindy’s shoulders and squeezed her.

Rindy hugged her mother, they said their goodbye’s and she and Abby were off to their lesson. 

Marg was considerably shorter than Carol, was almost as thin, and had dark black hair cut in a long bob. Her movements were crisp, yet graceful. She always wore black designer suits, heels, and gold jewelry. Margaret Callen, or Marg with a hard ‘g’, was known throughout the industry as a tough, intelligent agent at the top of her game. She represented several A-listers and some up-and-coming young women and men. Her specialty was grooming young talent. Carol had been her first client to make it big.

“Can I take your coat?” Carol asked. Marg slipped her coat off and handed it to the taller woman, then waited while she put it on a hanger in the closet. Marg took Carol’s arm and they made their way to the kitchen.

“Would you like some coffee?” she asked her agent.

“Sounds wonderful.”

Carol poured two cups of black coffee. “Are you hungry? I could make up a plate of some snacks.” She nervously stalled for time. Now that it was just the two of them, she was going to have to tell Marg why she was there.

“No dear.” She gently put her hand on Carol’s arm. She could see the taller woman wasn’t her normal, confident self. “Let’s sit and talk.”

They carried their coffee to the living room. Carol set her mug on the table behind the couch and sat safely in the corner with her legs crossed under her. She picked up a pillow and hugged it to her stomach. Marg sat near Carol and leaned toward her a bit. She put one arm up over the back of the couch and crossed her leg over the other toward the blonde, making herself comfortable. 

Marg took a sip of her coffee and asked, “Carol, what’s this about, love?” She only called her Carol when it was a personal matter. Somehow she seemed to know this was one of those conversations. The blonde looked over at her trusted agent and friend. She could see the concern on her face. Her dark eyes searched Carol’s, then she set her coffee on the table and moved her hand to the blonde’s knee.

“Marg, I don’t really know how to …” A tear fell from the corner of the blonde’s eye. She stubbornly wiped it with her hand. “I … um … you know that TMZ video we talked about Tuesday?”

“Yes. The red carpet stumble.”

“Well ...” Carol paused to wipe another tear. “God, I don’t know how to do this,” she said as she bent her head and buried her face in her hands.

“Carol. Love. Just tell me.” She squeezed the blonde's knee and dipped her head to try and see her face. “We’ve known each other for a long time now, since you were a very young woman. I _know_ you, Carol. Whatever this is, we can deal with it together.” She paused, giving Carol a little time. “You mentioned the TMZ video. Should I guess it has something to do with that young photographer?”

Carol looked up at her friend and agent with watery blue eyes and nodded her head. “Marg, I’m falling in love with her.” Tears were falling freely down her cheeks now.

Marg leaned over and picked a couple of tissues out of the box on the coffee table, then handed them to Carol. “You don’t seem very happy about this.”

Carol got up and paced like a caged jungle cat around the living room. “ _She_ makes me feel like I’m on cloud nine, happier than I’ve ever been. She makes me feel free to be myself, like I could really be happy for once in my life.”

“But?” Marg questioned, her head swiveled as she tried to follow Carol around the room. “Come sit down, love. We can’t have this conversation with you circling me.”

Carol dutifully sat back down and hugged the pillow again. “Marg, it’s the potential collateral damage that being with her could cause. What will you think of me? I will more than likely lose what’s left of my career. How will my family and friends feel? Harge? Will he try to cause problems with custody of Rindy? How will I’ll be judged for loving Therese? And those TMZ bastards! They’ve already ambushed her here, just outside the lobby doors and followed her cab home. Those are the things that are making me feel this dread.” She wiped her eyes, then continued. “It’s not Therese that’s the problem.” She paused then whispered through her sobs, “Never Therese.”

Marg set her coffee down again and moved closer to Carol. “Come here, love.” She opened her arms and wrapped them around her crying friend. “First of all, nothing can change how I feel about you. You’re like family to me, don’t you know that? I will always love you no matter the circumstance or the person you love.” She kissed Carol’s bent head and rubbed her back as she cried. “I want you to be happy.” Marg held her for a few minutes, then the blonde sat up again, her tears starting to ebb.

“I’m sorry,” Carol apologized as she ran her hands through her hair.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about, I’m glad you told me. I hate to see you so conflicted. We can figure this out. Where did you meet her? Please tell me she’s not paparazzi!” Marg laughed trying to lift Carol’s mood.

“I met her in the park last weekend. Rindy’s boat was being attacked by a swan and she helped get it back. We all went to dinner, and we just clicked. There is something about her, I felt it from the moment our eyes met. She had no idea who Carolyn Ross was until she saw me with Harge on that red carpet. She wasn’t scheduled to be there, but had a last minute assignment to shoot the event.”

“Who does she work for?”

“The Times.”

“How much time have you spent with her?” Marg was skeptical.

“Not a lot I guess, but we’ve become very close.” Carol knew she must sound crazy.

“You said you were falling in love with her. Does she feel the same?”

“Yes.” Carol smiled for the first time since they’d settled on the couch.

Marg softened at Carol’s genuine warmth and smile as she spoke of Therese. “Have you thought about how you want to move forward? Do you want to keep this quiet?”

“There’s a TMZ guy that seems very focused on me and Therese right now. I have no idea why. I thought after my semi-retirement, they would have lost interest in me by now. He seems intent on outing me. He’s just guessing for now, but he’s been relentless.”

“Carol love, you consistently play down your celebrity. You, my dear, are still a big deal, like it or not. I don’t even tell you about most of the inquiries my agency receives for you. Several modeling requests every week, talk shows, movie roles, reality TV, and so many more. Most are things I would never recommend to you, but quite a few are solid projects. Requests from all over the world. I have respected your decision though. I understand why you have pulled back on your work.”

“I appreciate that, Marg. As far as my relationship with Therese, I don’t want to constantly be hiding, sneaking around. I’m not ashamed of being with her, and I don’t want to lie or say she’s just a good friend. I had hoped for a little more time, but the Paps have forced my hand. I would rather do this on my terms.”

“I know you and Abby had a brief romantic relationship – is this different?” Marg asked.

“Yes. I will always love Abby, but we’re not … well … it’s different with Therese. She’s the one, Marg. I just know. I can feel it. She cares about me, the real me. She has no interest in the celebrity or public persona of Carolyn Ross. Rindy adores Therese, and she is so good with her. I want to be free to be with this woman in public and in private. I realize what that means. Well, I think I do.”

“She seemed young in the pictures I saw, a beautiful little thing. Is this relationship worth the trials we’ll have to face with your career and the press?”

“Yes,” Carol said confidently. Her will was resolved now.

“Is she ready to deal with it as well?” Marg knew the stresses relationships faced when regular people got involved with a celeb. It was always hard being in the shadow. “Is she ready to be Carolyn’s girlfriend as well as Carol’s? Unfortunately, they go hand in hand.”

“I don’t know for sure, but she says she can. TMZ is already all over her.” Carol balled her fists. “I hate that for her. She doesn’t have any experience with those jackals chasing and snapping pics when you least expect it. Bombarding her with questions, they even touched her.”

“They have no right to touch her, but they can harass her in public. I think you’re being a bit hasty in this Carol, do you really want to come out as a lesbian? It could ruin your career, everything we’ve built over the years,” Marg said with no malice in her voice. It was a sincere question.

“Honestly, if it wasn’t Therese, if she dumped me tomorrow, I would be completely heartbroken, but would try to find love with a woman, never another man. Harge was a mistake. I knew it shorty after we married. I only dated him because of my mother. I think she sensed I was different. Maybe she saw the attraction to Abby, or to other women. She never said anything, but I knew she wouldn’t tolerate any of that kind of behavior. And you, of all people, know she ruled with an iron fist. I was afraid to cross her. Hiring you was the only real time I stood up for myself.”

“I’m glad you stood up to her for me. You have been one of my personal and professional joys, Carol.” She smiled and hugged Carol again. She pulled back and looked intently into her blue eyes. “So you’re absolutely sure you want to go public?”

“Yes.”

“And you’re absolutely sure Therese will support this as well?”

“Yes. She says she will.”

“I’d like to meet her.”

“I knew you would. Maybe I’ll invite her to the shoot Wednesday, see if she can take the time off from work. You can meet her then.”

“All right. We should start by consulting a PR person that has experience with celebrities coming out. I’ve been handling your PR for a couple of years, but this warrants special attention. I can still deal with the press and anything else that comes up, but I would like some counsel from an expert.” Marg had put on her agent hat now, thinking of the best way to proceed.

“Yes, that seems wise. On a related subject, I want to announce the divorce as soon as possible. I’ve been after Harge to do it together, but he has been resistant. I told him Monday I was going to do it with or without him.”

“Do you want to hold a press conference or just release a statement?”

“I prefer just a statement, if you think that’s enough.”

“Let’s put it out and see what comes of it. I’ll write something up and send it to you later today, unless you prefer to write it yourself.”

“Thank you, Marg.”

“When will it be final?”

“A month, maybe.”

“Ok. We’ll release something Tuesday morning after I run it through legal on Monday. You may want to send it to Harge, not for approval necessarily.” Marg was all business now, her mind working out all the things she needed to do to set things in motion. “I assume you’ve contacted Fred? We may have some contract issues with you coming out. It _is_ 2016, but some will still have a problem with you being with a woman.”

“I have an appointment with him Monday morning. He only knows I am interested in what morality clauses I may be under right now, but he doesn’t know why yet. I trust him, so I thought I would tell him when we meet. He sounded cautiously optimistic when we spoke on the phone yesterday.”

“Would you mind if I sat in? I have an idea what we’re up against, but it would be helpful to know specifics.”

“Of course. We’re meeting at his office at eleven.”

“I’m mostly concerned with Giorgio.” Marg frowned.

“Yes, me too.” Carol lowered her head. “I hope he’ll understand.”

“He loves you, Carol. He has since he first met you so many years ago. Maybe Roberta can help us with him. They are both in town late next week. Would you like me to try and schedule a meeting with him?” Marg asked.

“Let’s see what Fred says, then decide. It’s all so hard. I just want to be myself, free to love whomever I chose,” Carol said, frustration in her voice.

“I know, love. Let me call my friend Leo. He has a well respected PR firm and has helped some other celebs come out. There will be consequences, and some people will be cruel. Are you ready for that?” The agent set her hand on Carol’s knee.

“No, but I will deal with it as it comes. Thanks for being so understanding.”

“Carol, you mean the world to me. If you’re sure about this, then I will support, defend, and love you – always.”

Carol's tears started to flow again. She wiped them with the tissue and hugged Marg again. “Thank you,” she said quietly. “I love you too.”

* * *

Marg left with hugs at the door and a final “You’re sure?” and a final answer of “Yes.”

Carol refilled her coffee and called Therese, hoping to talk with her before Abby and Rindy got home.

“Carol,” Therese answered right away.

“Darling, it’s good to hear your voice.”

“I miss you,” Therese admitted.

“I miss you too. Are you at home?” Carol asked.

“Yes. Are you?”

“Yes.”

“What are you wearing?” Therese teased in a sultry voice.

“Therese! Don’t you start with that now. I can’t bear it!”

“You’re no fun. I just got out of the shower. Want to guess what I’m wearing?” Therese teased some more.

“You are a little minx this morning!” Carol said incredulously, then added in a deep voice, “Tell me.”

“Nothing,” Therese breathily whispered into the phone.

Carol was silent. Her imagination filled her mind with an image of what Therese’s naked body might look like in her bed. “Mmmm,” was all she could manage as a response.

“You sure you don’t want to have another _conversation_?” Therese asked seductively.

“Darling, if Abby and Rindy weren’t due to walk in that door any minute, I would _talk_ with you for hours, wishing only for you to be here with me.”

“When can I see you?” Therese asked impatiently.

“I guess this slow down plan of ours isn’t going to work out very well, is it?” the blonde teased.

“No, it would seem my fears have no chance when it comes to you. I’ve been thinking about what you said last night.” Therese put on her robe and sat on her bed.

“Which part, angel?”

“When you said you weren't sure if you were what's best for my life. Carol, I can’t think of anything else except you. I want to be with you no matter what we have to go through. I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to though. I mean about your career and going public. I’m happy to just be with you, however private or public you want to be.”

“Therese …” Carol was quiet for a moment. “You don’t have any idea how much I wish we were together right now so I could take you in my arms and never let you go.”

“I want that too,” Therese answered.

“My agent just left. It’s in motion, darling. We’re going to announce the divorce on Tuesday and Marg is calling a PR person she knows that has experience with celebs coming out.”

“I don’t know what to say. Are you sure, Carol?”

“Yes, angel. I’m sure how I feel about you. The rest is just noise.”

Carol heard a commotion at the door, then little feet coming down the hallway. “Can I call you back in a few minutes, darling? Abby and Rindy just got home.” Carol smiled at them as they came into the living room.

“Yes, talk to you in a few.” Therese paused, wanting to say more, but just added, “Bye.”

“Bye.” Carol smiled as she ended the call.

“Mommy! I learned how to get a toy off the bottom of the pool!” Rindy said as she climbed into her mother’s lap.

“You did! That’s amazing! Was it fun?” Carol asked as she hugged her daughter and slid her phone into her pocket.

“Yes! I need a bath now – I smell like the pool. Yuck!”

“Do you need help?”

“No.” Rindy slid off her lap and went down the hall toward her bathroom.

“Ok, I’ll check on you in a few minutes. Do a good job. I have to drop you at your Dad’s later!” Carol called after her.

“She did really well today,” Abby said. “Is there any more coffee?”

“Yes, in the press on the kitchen counter.”

“How would you feel about meeting Sami tonight?” Abby asked as she walked into the kitchen. “She’s invited us to dinner at her restaurant.”

“That sounds wonderful. Can Therese join us?” Carol stood and followed Abby.

“Sure. Then I can meet this girl that’s stolen your heart.”

“She’s a woman Abby, and I would love for you to meet her. What time? I’ll call her and see if she’s free. Could you pick her up? Just in case those TMZ bastards are watching us.”

“We need to be there by seven, so I would have to pick her up by six-twenty’ish.”

“Great. That’s perfect. I can drop Rindy with Harge and then meet you.”

“I’ll go check on Rindy. Call your girl back,” Abby said as she headed toward the hall to Rindy’s bathroom.

“How do you know I was on the phone with her?” Carol called after her.

Abby stopped and looked back at her friend. “You had that dreamy look in your eyes and a goofy smile on your face when you ended the call as we came in.”

“You know me too well, Abigail.” Carol smiled.

“I do, and I love you anyway! Now, call her while I check on all that splashing I hear down the hall.”


	13. Fidelity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!
> 
> Make sure you didn't miss Chapter 12! ^.^

**Fidelity:** As applied to sound quality, the faithfulness to the original.

 

Abby pulled her car up in front of the address Carol had given her. She thought she recognized Therese standing near the entrance, so she got out and looked around to see if anyone was watching, and to get a better look at the girl. She didn’t want to leave her car double parked, so she waved at the young woman. “Therese?” she yelled loud enough for the girl to hear her. 

Therese walked to the car and said, “Abby?”

“Yes. Hop in.”

Therese got in the car, and put on her seatbelt. She set her handbag on her lap and nervously fiddled with the the buckle. She looked around the pristine luxury car, then focused on her driver.

“I guess we should properly introduce ourselves. Abigail Gerhard, best friend and confidant of the remarkable Carol Aird slash Carolyn Ross.” Abby offered her hand.

“Therese Belivet, love interest and hopefully, new friend to the best friend of the most amazing woman, Carol slash Carolyn.” She smiled and took Abby’s hand, then gave it a slight squeeze in return.

They both laughed. Abby studied Therese for a moment. _She is a beauty — fine features, petite, lovely long dark hair, cute figure, great legs, and that smile with those dimples … I can see why Carol is attracted to her. She’s young and clearly nervous, but she has such clear, expressive, intelligent eyes, perhaps an ‘old soul’ as they say ..._

Therese interrupted Abby’s thoughts. “It’s nice to meet you. Where are we going exactly?”

“It’s great to meet you too. Carol has told me a lot about you. Gushed on and on actually.” Abby laughed. “We’re headed just outside of Paramus. My girlfriend owns a steakhouse there. She inherited it from her estranged father when he passed away almost a year ago.”

“Carol said she thought it was far enough out of town that we shouldn’t run into any paparazzi, but she didn’t say exactly where we were going.”

“I think you’ll be ok. We have a quiet booth in a corner reserved, so no one should bother us.”

“Sounds great. I’m still getting used to this whole celebrity thing. I recognized a couple of the TMZ guys hanging around my apartment building when I went out earlier. They took a few pictures, but they weren’t there when I got home.” She was quiet for a few minutes while Abby negotiated some heavy traffic. “Thanks for picking me up. Do they know you and your car?”

“I don’t think they have any interest in me, they might but I’ve known Carol since we were kids. I’m old news. But if they’re watching you, we need to be careful.” Abby paused, then asked, “So you really had no idea who Carol was when you met her?”

“No, I didn’t. I don’t follow celebrity news much or fashion.” She laughed and continued, “I mean, look at how I dress! Do I look like I know anything about high fashion?”

Abby looked at her clothes. She had on a simple white dress with a ‘V’ neck that exposed her chest, but not too much, and a sleek black leather jacket. The hemline of her dress ended above her knees and she wore black heeled pumps. “You look great! You must be a natural at fashion.” She smiled at the younger woman.

“Thanks.” Therese blushed a little at the compliment. She was nervous because she wanted to make a good impression on Abby. If she didn’t like her, it might strain her relationship with Carol, and she didn’t think they needed any more obstacles.

They were quiet for a few minutes as they drove on. Abby looked over at her passenger and asked, “Are you serious about Carol? I mean, do you really care for her?”

“Abby, I know it’s happening really fast, and I don’t understand it myself, but yes, I care for her deeply. She is … she’s so … I mean … she just happened to me. This extraordinary woman came into my life, at the park of all places.”

“She’s about to turn her world upside down …” Abby wanted to add _because of you, to be with you._ but she didn’t say anything more.

“I know and I’m not sure she should. Not because I’m not ‘all in’ as they say, because I am. I’m willing to follow her lead, but I’ve told her I just want to be with her, to explore this thing between us. She doesn’t need to change anything for me. We can remain as private or as public as she decides.”

“Are you sure you know what you’re signing up for? Celebrity is no picnic. It has perks certainly, but living in a ‘fishbowl’ is part of the deal.”

“Not really, but I really care about Carol. I don’t want to give up before we try.”

“I’ve watched her navigate the public since we were teenagers and it’s hard having limited privacy. She’s very gracious and smart about it all, and it hasn’t been as bad the last few years since she’s made herself scarce. I’ve been out with her on occasion when the Paps and the fans have been relentless in their pursuit of a picture, an autograph or a selfie with her. They’ll push you aside to get to her. Many, not all, but many don’t care if she’s with Rindy, or me, and now it will be you too. You’ll want to defend her or step in on her behalf, and you won’t be able to stop it. You’ll have to let her deal with it.”

“I hadn’t thought much about those things. I don’t think I would like what you’ve described much. Not because of me being pushed aside, but because I would be worried for her. There are a lot of crazy people out there.”

“You’re right, there are a lot of crazy people out there. She’s never had it as bad as some, but she’s experienced her share. A couple of stalkers even, that was truly terrifying.” Abby looked over at Therese. She could see the young woman was thinking about what she’d said. “I’m not trying to scare you Therese, I just want you to know what you’re up against. If she does come out publicly, all of that attention will be hyper focused on her, and probably you too, for a good while. Do you care about her enough to go through that hell?”

Therese was quiet. She looked out the window, thinking about what Abby had said. “Abby?”

“Yes?”

“I don’t know if I’m ready for all those things, and it may be hell at times, but she’s worth _all_ of it. I’m falling in love with her, Abby. I can’t think about anything or anyone else but her. Just mentioning her now has made my heart beat a little faster and I have goosebumps on my arms. I can hardly sit still because I’m so excited we’re driving toward her. I love being in her arms and spending time talking with her. I could drown in those blue eyes of hers for the rest of my life. Abby, this is the real thing. I would never mislead her about this, about being with her or how I feel about her.”

“I don’t want to see her get hurt. This last year has been rough on her, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen her as happy since she met you.” Abby paused then added quietly, “Not even with me.” She saw a questioning look come over the young woman’s face.

“Not even with you?” Therese asked. “You were together?”

“Damn, I shouldn’t have said that. Carol should explain that to you. It didn’t last and it was a long time ago.”

“Oh,” Therese said as she hugged her arms around herself, suddenly cold. “Has she had a lot of girlfriends? Someone like Carol could have anyone she wanted.”

“No, she hasn’t.” She looked over and registered Therese’s closed body language — her darkened mood. “Hey now, come on. Trust me, there is no need to worry or be jealous. What we had was brief and then it changed. Things change. We’ll always be best friends, but that chapter is over for us. She never looked at me in person the way she looks when she talks about you. You’ve got nothing to worry about – she’s crazy about you, Therese.”

“I’m sorry. I guess I’m a little intimidated by you, her celebrity, her life ...”

“No, I’m sorry. I don’t want to see Carol hurt and I took it too far.”

“Do you think I would hurt her?” Therese asked.

Abby looked at her and smiled. “No, I don’t think you would.”

“I wouldn’t. Ever.”

“I can see that now. How about we lighten up a little bit? What do you say?”

“Ok.” Therese tried to relax a little bit. She went back to fiddling with the buckle on her bag again.

“We’re going to a steakhouse. You’re not a veggie or a vegan, are you? You might go hungry if you’re the latter!”

“No. I love a good steak and I’m starving.” Therese admitted.

“Good! I think you’ll like my girlfriend. She’s a lot of fun.” Abby smiled at her. “Hey, pick some music we can dance to!”

“Dance? In the car?”

“Sure, why not. We can sing too.” Abby grinned at her. “We still have about fifteen minutes before we get there.”

“Oh, I don’t sing,” Therese said shyly.

“Neither do I! Hasn’t stopped me yet!”

* * *

Carol was waiting for them in her car when they pulled into the restaurant parking lot. She had backed her car into the space so she could keep an eye out for them. Abby parked next to her and watched as Therese’s whole face lit up when she saw Carol. She unbuckled her seatbelt and practically jumped out of the car when it stopped.

“Hey, I haven’t even shifted it into Park yet!” Abby yelled after the young woman.

Carol got out of her car, equally excited to see Therese. “Darling!” she said as Therese stepped up next to her. “Did anyone follow you?”

“Carol!” Therese said as she stared at the taller woman, her heels giving her a little more height than normal. “I don’t think so. Can I hug you?”

“I don’t think anyone followed me either. I’ve been here about ten minutes and haven’t seen anything suspicious.” She looked around again, then opened her arms. “Come here.”

Therese stepped into her arms and wrapped hers under Carol’s blazer around her waist. “Oh god Carol, I’ve missed you,” she said as she tucked her nose into the blonde’s neck.

“Me too angel, me too.” Carol closed her eyes and held the smaller woman close to her.

Abby got out of her car and locked it. “Hi Carol, never mind me,” she teased.

“Hi Abby,” she said as she continued to hug Therese, her eyes still closed.

“You two want to go inside or just stay out here all night?”

Carol and Therese broke their hug, but stayed close together. “Sorry, Abby,” Therese said.

“It’s all good. Come on, lovebirds.”

They all walked into the restaurant and were greeted by the hostess. She led them to a table in the back corner of the large room. The booth had high backs and was secluded from the other booths and the nearby tables. The lighting was dark except over their actual table. The cloth over it was black and was set for four.

“I’m just going to head to the ladies room. I’ll be right back.” Therese excused herself.

Carol watched her go. She shifted in her seat a few times, then started to say as she stood, “Um … I think I …” 

Abby interrupted her, “Jesus Carol, just go. Don’t be all night, for god’s sake!” She snickered at how quickly her friend walked following the path Therese had taken.

Therese had just finished washing up and was drying her hands when Carol came in to the ladies room. She whispered, “Is anyone else in here?”

“No, I don’t think so. Why are you whispering?”

Carol took her arm and led her into the handicapped stall in the corner. She shut and locked the door, then turned to a surprised Therese. “Come here,” she growled.

Therese took the taller woman’s cheeks in her hands as she pulled her in close and their hungry lips found one another. Her hands pulled at Carol’s oxford shirt until the tails were free of her slacks. She moved her hands under to find smooth skin. “Oh god, Carol,” she said between heated kisses. She spun their entwined bodies and pushed the blonde against the stone tiled wall, then stood on her tiptoes and opened her mouth, seeking a more intimate connection. Carol’s tongue entered her mouth and caressed her tongue, teeth, and lips, then retreated. She entered her mouth again, then retreated, luring Therese’s tongue to follow inside her mouth. Once she had, Carol sucked her tongue in and swirled her own around it, then slowly released it.

Therese broke the kiss, her chest heaving as she tried to slow her heart rate and control her breathing. She looked up into Carol’s eyes and found them almost black with desire. With renewed lust she wrapped her arms around the taller woman's neck and moved her thigh between Carol's legs.

“Therese …” Carol moaned. “What about …” She gasped between deep kisses. “What about the … Therese …” She growled as the smaller woman kissed and licked her neck. Her hips involuntarily started to move against Therese’s leg. “The slow down plan …” Carol tried to ask as her hand roamed over Therese’s covered breast, and the other squeezed her ass. Carol spread her legs and slid down the wall a little bit to gain more contact.

“Fuck the slow down plan,” Therese said, as she moved a hand to Carol’s chest and started to unbutton her shirt.

“Fuck …” Carol said under her breath when the smaller woman opened her shirt and kneaded her breast under her bra, then pinched her nipple.

The ladies room door opened and two women entered chattering on about something they had just eaten and how full they were. The lovers stood still in each other’s arms as one of the women rattled the door to the stall they were in. She mumbled “Sorry” and moved to the one across the way. Therese rested her forehead on Carol’s chest as both women tried to catch their breaths. They looked at each other and giggled.

“We should probably go back to the table. Abby is going to tease us mercilessly,” Carol whispered.

“Sorry, I just want you so bad.”

Carol kissed Therese, trying not to reignite their passion and whispered back, “My angel, you have no idea how badly I want to just get in the car and go, so we can be alone.”

The other women had continued to chat and finished up, seemingly unaware of Carol and Therese, then left the lovers alone again.

“I want that too, but I’m actually glad we were interrupted. I don’t want our first time to be in a bathroom stall,” Therese said as she pulled away from Carol.

Carol started to button her shirt from the bottom, when Therese said, “Let me.” The smaller woman grinned as she leaned in and kissed the taller woman’s chest several times, then buttoned her shirt. The blonde tucked her shirt tails back into her pants and straightened her blazer. Therese turned and had her hand on the latch when Carol wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her back. She moved her dark hair and kissed her neck near her ear.

“How am I supposed to get through dinner and meeting Abby’s girlfriend, when all I want to do is be alone with you?” she whispered in Therese’s ear.

She leaned back into Carol and said, “I have no idea, but if you figure it out, let me know. I have the same problem.” She pushed her ass into the blonde and unlatched the door. She checked herself in the mirror and walked to the ladies room door. “You coming?”

“No! Damn it.” She winked at Therese and then sighed and added, “Yes. Let’s go.” She looked in the mirror one more time, checking for any signs of what they’d been up to. She knew Abby would be looking for the smallest clue to tease them.

As they walked back to the table, Therese felt Carol’s hand gently pressed to the small of her back. She loved the contact and feeling of the blonde’s affectionate gesture. She was distracted by her thoughts when she first saw her. Then recognition set in.

“What the fuck are you doing here?!” Therese said to the redhead sitting at their table.

“Therese?” Carol said, not understanding her reaction.

“What are you doing here? I own the place,” the redhead responded.

Abby came up behind Carol and said, “ I was just getting my phone from the car …” She looked at Sami and Therese scowling at each other. “What’s going on?” she asked, clearly confused.

“I don’t know,” Carol said to her best friend. They seemed to know one another already. “Therese?”

Therese grabbed her purse and coat off the bench seat of the booth and pushed her way between Carol and Abby. “I have to go,” she said under her breath, not giving anyone a chance to react before she was gone.

“Sami? Do you know Therese?” Abby asked.

“We dated a couple of years ago,” Sami answered.

“You?!” Carol exclaimed. “Fuck! I have to go after her.” Carol grabbed her purse and ran back through the restaurant after Therese. Waiters and guests watched as the tall blonde chased after the petite brunette. “Therese! Wait!”

Therese burst through the doors and ran into the parking lot. She stopped and tried to catch her breath. _What the fuck is SHE doing here! Oh god, is she Abby’s girlfriend? How can this fucking unbelievable shit be happening? THIS cannot be happening!_ “Fuck!” she yelled.

“Therese?!” Carol called to her. She watched the small woman as she paced and swore. She caught up to her and took her in her arms. Therese was crying and fought her, but Carol wouldn’t let her go. “Therese, talk to me. Was that the woman you told me about? Is Sami the married one?” She hugged her tighter. “Please tell me, angel.”

Therese quit fighting and held on to Carol. “Yes,” she sobbed. “It’s her. How can she be here? How? She didn’t own a fucking steakhouse!” She tried to pull away from Carol again, but she wouldn’t let her go.

“Let’s get you in the car. It’s chilly out here,” Carol tried to soothe her. Therese was quiet in her arms. “Come on.” She loosened her grip on the smaller woman and tried to catch her eye, but she wouldn’t look at her. She led her to her SUV and opened the passenger door. Gently she turned her toward the door and said softly, “Please get in, darling.”

Therese slid into the seat with her feet on the sill of the door. Carol moved in close and wrapped her arms around her, then ran her fingers through her hair. Therese continued to cry and laid her cheek on Carol’s chest. They stayed in their embrace until the tears stopped. “Here, put your legs in the car, angel.” She did as Carol asked. Carol moved away from her and closed the car door. She moved around the car and slipped into the driver’s seat. She leaned over and kissed Therese softly on her lips and asked, “Do you want me to take you to your apartment?”

“Can we go to your house?” Therese asked in a voice so quiet Carol almost couldn’t hear her.

“Wherever you want to go, my angel,” Carol said and started the engine.

What they couldn’t see was the man in the car across the parking lot. His long lens focused on the two women. They couldn’t hear the shutter clicking on automatic to capture every minute of their embrace in the parking lot and the SUV, then their chaste kiss in the car. He even took shots of them as Carol drove away.


	14. Absorption

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Ligeria for her support, encouragement, and being the fastest Beta in the West!

**Absorption:** : In acoustics, the changing of sound energy to heat.

Therese leaned her head against the window as they drove back to New York. They hadn’t spoken much after they left the steakhouse. Carol wasn’t sure if she should ask or give Therese some space. 

After ten minutes of silence, Carol quietly asked, “Are you all right, darling?”

“No, not really.” Therese sighed heavily. “My head is pounding and I feel nauseous.”

“Would you like me to pull over?”

“No, I think I’ll be ok until we get home.”

Carol was struck with a sense of something she hadn't expected at Therese’s words. _Home …_ She felt a warmth spread over her as she thought about what their future could be. Of course, she hadn’t meant it literally and it was much too soon for them to share a home, but the thought filled her with hope.

“Let me know if you change your mind, darling.”

“I will, thanks.” Therese set her hand over Carol’s and pulled it over to rest on her thigh, then leaned against the window again.

“Do you want to talk about what happened?” Carol asked tentatively. Therese was clearly in distress and she didn’t quite know how to navigate this situation.

“Not yet,” she replied. “I’m not shutting you out, I just need a little time to process.” She laced her fingers with Carol’s.

“I’ll trust you to let me know when you’re ready. Please don’t worry that this changes anything between us, at least from my side of things.”

“Abby is your best friend.”

“She is, and I have concerns for her, but you are my priority right now. I …” She stopped herself from saying more. She navigated the media system to play some soft instrumental music as they drove on.

As they neared her apartment Carol said, “Darling?” There was no answer. She gently squeezed Therese's hand to get her attention. “Therese?” she said a little bit louder - her passenger clearly deep in thought. 

She turned her head toward Carol. “Yes?”

“Darling, I hate to ask you this, but we are getting close to … home. I’m concerned there could be a photographer outside the garage.”

“What do we do? We can’t be seen going into your building together.”

“I’m sorry. Hopefully, someday this won’t be an issue.” She brought their joined hands to her lips and kissed the back of Therese’s.

“Should I get in the back and hide?”

“Rindy’s car seat might be in the way. Can you reach the blanket that's back there? Maybe slide down to the floor board and cover yourself? I hate to ask, I know you’re not feeling well.”

“I’ll feel worse if we are exposed by those TMZ assholes.” Therese reached behind Carol and grabbed the soft dark grey throw in the backseat. “Got it,” she said. She slipped off her heels and unbuckled her seatbelt. The car immediately started chiming, protesting this new, unsafe development. Therese slipped down onto the floor and covered her body with the throw and folded her elbows under her head on the seat. Carol reached over and pulled the blanket up to hide her better, squeezing her shoulder before she removed her hand. “This isn’t too bad actually.” Therese smiled up at her, then pulled the throw completely over her head.

There were two photographers at the garage door. The flashes almost blinded Carol as she pulled inside. Fortunately, the attended garage had no real view inside from the street. Carol drove down the ramp and turned to park in her spot.

“I’m glad you have parking in your building,” Therese said, her voice muffled under the blanket.

“It’s prohibitively expensive and I’ve thought about keeping the car elsewhere, but I’m glad I haven’t now.” Carol put the car in park and set the brake, then looked at her passenger.

“Is it safe yet?” Therese asked.

“Yes. We should be fine now. They can’t see this spot or the elevator from the street.”

Therese crawled back up into the seat and removed the throw from herself. She folded it and tossed it back in the backseat, then slipped her shoes back on her feet. The women both opened their doors and got out of the SUV. The smaller woman adjusted her dress and coat, and they headed toward the elevator.

“Good evening, Dave,” Carol said to the security officer.

“Hello, Mrs. Aird,” he said to Carol and nodded his head at Therese, as he pressed the elevator call button for the women.

The elevator bell sounded and the doors opened. The women got in and Carol pressed the button for her floor. “Have a good night, ladies,” Dave said.

“You too,” Carol returned.

The doors shut and Carol turned to find Therese leaning against the wall. “Darling, are you still feeling ill?” She opened her arms to the smaller woman.

“Yes. I really feel terrible. I’m sorry.” She moved into Carol’s arms and sighed as the blonde folded her into her body.

“No need to be sorry.” She held Therese close and kissed her temple. “We’ve had quite an illuminating evening. Let’s get you upstairs and tuck you into bed. I’m sure you’ll feel better tomorrow.”

“Ok.”

* * *

Carol stood in the kitchen watching her chicken soup heat. _What a tangled mess! How can Sami be the woman that hurt Therese so badly? Abby really likes this woman. I’m falling in love with Therese, or have already fallen if I’m honest. How do we resolve this dilemma?_

She was interrupted by her phone vibrating in her pocket.

“Hi Abby,” she answered.

“Hi. Is Therese ok? Are you?”

“No. She’s asleep in the guest room. She didn’t feel well all the way home. I hope she’ll be better once the shock wears off.”

“I’m sorry, Carol. I had no idea of their history.”

“Oh Abby, how could you have known? She told me about her ex, I never even thought to ask her name. She said she had red hair, but I didn’t think anything of it.”

“After you left, Sami and I talked. We had just been enjoying each other without knowing much about our pasts, or getting too serious. She told me what happened between them. She feels bad about her reaction tonight. She also told me how they broke up. Sounded brutal for Therese. Sami said she wished she’d handled it differently.”

“Please tell me she’s not still married.”

“No, her husband divorced her last year when she told him she was gay. I guess she had some kind of a break down and finally figured it out.”

“She really hurt Therese.”

“I can only imagine. I went after you tonight, but by the time I caught up, you were with her and I thought it best to leave you two alone.”

“Thank’s for that, but yes, leaving us was best.” 

“Carol,” Abby paused. “I really like Sami.”

“I know you do, darling. We’ll figure it out.”

“For the record, I think Therese is great. I’m glad I got to spend a little time with her before it all went to hell tonight. She really cares for you.”

“I know.” Carol smiled at her friend’s kind words. “Abby, I think I love her.”

“It’s fast, but I’m pretty sure she feels the same. I’m happy for you both.”

“Thanks. I’m going to eat some soup, shower and go to bed. Talk tomorrow?”

“Yes, tomorrow.”

* * *

Therese woke a few hours later. Her stomach had felt a little better by the time they got to the apartment, but she wasn’t hungry. Her head was still pounding. Carol had been so understanding and let her have her space. She had put out some pain killers, fresh towels and a t-shirt and shorts for her. She’d kissed her softly and left her alone. Therese had showered and gone to bed without letting herself think anything more about Sami.

She woke a few hours later. Her head felt better, not completely one-hundred percent, but better. Now, in the dark she had no distractions. 

_So Sami is with Abby now. What are the fucking odds of that happening? Abby is Carol’s best friend. They aren’t going to want to date people that can’t stand to be around each other. What did Abby say about the steakhouse … something about her inheriting it from her father? I remember her saying she worked in her family's restaurant when she was in high school and undergrad. I know she didn’t get along with her dad, and it had gotten worse after her mom died. She was an only child, so her dad must have left it to her. How do we fix this?_

_Oh god, is she still married?! Is she playing Abby?! How the hell did those two meet? How serious are they? I’m sure after what I told Carol, she’s having the same thoughts? Why did I react so poorly to seeing her? It all came back, the hurt, the anger, it was like a flash fire I had no control over._

Therese rolled over and fluffed her pillow. _I need to be the bigger person here. Somehow figure out how to get along with Sami. I don’t want her back and it was a long time ago now. Yes, it hurt badly, but I’m ok, I survived, I’m stronger. I’m with Carol now and that is what’s important. I don’t want anyone but Carol. The way I feel about her makes my relationship with Sami seem like child's play. As much as I thought it was love, and maybe it was a kind of love, but it was nothing like I feel for Carol. The depth and the bond I have with Carol already is what love is supposed to be. Carol is … she means so much to me already … I … I love her. That’s all that matters. Moving forward, not looking back is what's important._

Therese reached over and picked up her phone. She went to her favorites and called Carol.

It rang a few times, and then a sleepy voice answered.

“Hello.”

“Hi.” Therese’s mood was instantly lifted hearing Carol on the other end of the phone.

“Are you calling me from the guest room?”

“Maybe.” Therese giggled at her own ridiculousness.

“Are you feeling better, darling?” Carol sat up and turned on the bedside lamp, then settled back on her pillows.

“Yes. I’m feeling lonely now.” Therese grinned as she sat up.

“Is that right? What should we do about it?” Carol asked suggestively.

“Hmmm, I don’t know. Have any ideas?” Therese said as she walked to the door of the guestroom.

“We could have a _conversation_ about it.”

“We could, if you’re not too tired.” Therese was now standing in the hallway near Carol’s door.

“What are you wearing?” Carol asked seductively.

Therese looked down at herself. “A black t-shirt with some red buffalo plaid flannel shorts.”

“Anything else?”

“No.”

“Mmmm … your legs must look great.”

“What are you wearing?” Therese asked flirtatiously.

Carol paused for effect. Then whispered, “Nothing.”

Therese groaned as she stepped into the doorway and looked at the bed. She could see Carol’s bare shoulders with her blonde hair cascading around them — her head on the pillows against the headboard. She looked into the woman’s eyes as she whispered back into the phone, “Nothing?”

Carol lowered her voice and said into the phone, “Why don’t you come over here and see?”

“Maybe I will …” Therese took the phone from her ear and ended the call, then set her phone on a table near the door. She slowly walked toward the bed and the blonde.

Carol put her phone on the bedside table and watched Therese approach her. “Mmmm, I was right. Your legs look sexy in my shorts.”

Therese moved closer. “They do?” She slowly turned and lifted the t-shirt, then ran her hands over her behind. “How does my ass look?” she asked as she looked at Carol over her shoulder.

Carol growled and stared at the petite brunette’s perfect ass. She managed to find her voice, “Darling, there are no words for how amazing your ass looks in those shorts.”

Therese turned and took another step toward the bed. “It’s a shame this t-shirt is a little tight.” She brought her hands up over her stomach and looked down at her breasts. The peaks of her nipples were straining against the material.

Carol licked her lips as her eyes roamed over Therese’s chest and then moved up to her eyes. “Mmmm, maybe you should take it off. I mean, if it’s uncomfortable.”

Therese took another step toward the bed. “Well, I really came over here to see what _you_ were wearing.” She looked at the edge of the blanket near the top of Carol’s breasts. “I expected some kind of lacy nightgown. I’m pleased to find I was wrong.”

“Since our _conversation_ I decided it felt good to be ‘free’ for you, darling. I’ve given them up when Rindy’s not home.”

“For me?” she asked.

“ _All_ for you,” Carol said, her voice low and sexy.

Therese’s knees were pressed against the mattress now. They had maintained eye contact as she’d moved closer. She looked down into mesmerizing blue eyes and lifted her fingers to the edge of the blanket. “May I?” she asked.

“Yes,” Carol said.

Therese lifted the blanket away, leaving the white sheet over Carol. Her eyes moved along the curves, dips and valleys of the blonde’s body that the sheet clung to, but still kept hidden. She reached out and ran her hand over the woman’s knee, up and along her hip to her flat stomach.

She looked up and found that Carol had been watching. Her eyes traveled down to Carol’s breasts and noticed the two points that had lifted the sheet. She smiled and removed her hands from Carol’s body.

The smaller woman’s hands were shaking a little bit as she leaned over Carol and took the hem of the sheet in her fingers.

“Are you nervous, angel?” the blonde asked.

“I’m so many things right now. Nervous, excited, aroused, and filled with awe.”

Carol reached her hand up and threaded her fingers in the hair at the back of her lover’s neck and gently pulled Therese’s mouth to her lips, then kissed her slowly and thoroughly. Her tongue moved languidly inside her mouth and slid along her lips as she broke the kiss. She cupped her cheek with her other hand and looked into her eyes. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Mmmm hmmm …” was all Therese could say in response, then leaned down and kissed her lover as they had before. She brought her hands to Carol's neck and ran her fingers down over her shoulders to the edge of the sheet. She looked up into her blue eyes, and found desire looking back into her green. She slowly dragged the sheet down the blonde’s body, revealing her breasts and then her stomach. She stopped and drank in the vision before her.

“Carol … I never imagined you could be… god you’re … are you real? How can you be so beautiful?” She knelt down beside the bed and reached out her hand and flattened it on her lover’s stomach. Therese gently trailed her fingers up over the creamy skin of her breasts. She slowly circled around the dusky pink of her areola, then the pebbled peak of her nipple.

Carol watched her and moaned her name, “Therese …” as she explored her body. 

Therese traced under the curve of her bosom with the tips of her fingers and repeated her caress on her other breast, then looked up at Carol and smiled. She stood and took the hem of her t-shirt in her hands.

Carol sat up and pulled the sheet with her – still covered. Only her legs were revealed as she moved them over the edge of the bed. “Let me,” she said, as she moved her hands to Therese’s hips and pulled the standing woman between her knees. Therese looked down at her as the blonde slid her hands from her hips up her sides and over her ribs. Her hands pushed the t-shirt over her skin, then up over her breasts. “Gorgeous …” she whispered, then took one of her erect tips into her mouth and gently sucked as she moved her tongue around her nipple. She let it go and flattened her tongue as she licked up and over, then circled around and sucked it into her mouth again. She moved to the other and did the same with her tongue, as she caressed the first with her fingers.

Therese moaned and laced her fingers in Carol’s hair. Her other hand rested on her lover’s shoulder, then moved down over her back and pulled her closer. “Oh god, Carol …”

Carol pulled away from her lover’s chest and lifted the t-shirt over Therese’s head. She tossed the material away to the floor. Setting her hands on her hips again, she turned her around and moved her hands up to her shoulders then down her back. The taller woman leaned forward and kissed Therese’s spine, then moved her hands back up to her shoulder blades and dragged her short nails down her back, leaving pink lines in their wake. Therese arched her back toward her lover and asked her to do it again. Carol repeated her kisses and scratches up and down her back.

When her hands met the elastic of the plaid shorts, she hooked her thumbs under and slowly pulled them down over Therese’s behind. “Therese … you’re perfect ...” she murmured as she let the shorts drop down her legs to her feet. Carol cupped her ass and kneaded with her fingers. She leaned over and kissed her lower back, then wrapped one of her arms around her lover’s waist. She opened her mouth and swirled her tongue around at the top of the crack between her cheeks, then kissed her lower back again.

Therese turned to face Carol and lifted her face with her hands. The blonde’s hands slid back to her hips as Therese leaned down and kissed her, smiling between kisses as she teased, “Maybe we should go back to the slow down plan.”

Carol playfully bit her lip as she kissed her, then pinched her ass. “No, I don’t think so,” she growled and they both laughed.

They continued to kiss and Therese gently pushed Carol back on the bed, removing the remaining covering the sheet had provided. The blonde slid back toward the middle of the bed as Therese crawled up and hovered above her. She leaned down and kissed Carol’s lips, then her jaw, and then her neck. She lifted back up and flipped her hair to one side, then slowly lowered her body on top of Carol, her knees on either side of her lover. One of her arms moved under the blonde’s arm and her other hand slid into Carol’s hair as they continued to kiss. Carol wrapped one arm around her back and moved her other hand down to Therese’s ass and squeezed. They both moaned as their bodies joined skin on skin for the first time. 

They slowly moved against one another and explored soft skin with their hands and lips. Therese lifted up on her hands and pushed back onto her knees. “Carol, will you move your head to the pillows?”

“Yes.” She rolled over and lifted on to her hands and knees to move to the center of the bed. 

Therese was overcome with desire for her and hooked her arm around her waist and moved one of her legs between Carol’s as she hovered above her back. The blonde turned her head, trying to look at her lover over her shoulder. Therese followed the valley of Carol’s spine with her hand and her lips, then kissed down over her behind. 

“Mmmm … that feels so good,” the blonde said as she arched her back pushing her ass up for her lover.

Therese’s nose was close to her lover’s center now and she could smell the blonde’s arousal. “Fuck, you’re sexy.” She breathed in her scent as her hands caressed Carol’s ass, then the backs of her thighs and down her calves. “Lie on your back for me, baby,” Therese purred.

Carol moved up on the bed. She rolled on her back and bent her knees together, then folded them to her side at the center of the bed. She adjusted the pillows and looked at her lover. “You called me ‘baby’ that night we had our _conversation_ ”

“I’m not usually one for nicknames, and I love saying your name, Carol. It just came out,” Therese said, unsure if she should have called her that pet name.

“I like it … from you,” Carol admitted shyly.

Therese crawled up and kissed her lips, then along her jaw and nipped her way up to her ear. “Baby … you smell so good, I can’t wait to taste you,” she whispered as she traced the shell of Carol’s ear with her nose. The blonde moaned and pulled her lover to her and wrapped her arms around her as Therese softly exhaled into her ear, then took her lobe between her teeth and sucked it between her lips. 

She lifted herself off Carol and moved down her body, then put her hands on Carol’s knees. She lifted them off the bed and kissed each one. Gently she started to part them, looking up to find Carol's eyes locked on her as she slowly opened her legs for her. Therese looked back down at the patch of blonde curly hair and Carol’s glistening sex. She wanted to taste her and was tempted to take her with her mouth right then, but also wanted to take her time showing this woman her love.

Therese crawled up between Carol’s knees and leaned over and kissed her below her navel, then kissed her way up between her breasts to her neck. She lifted her head and looked into Carol’s eyes. She held her weight on one arm and brought her hand up to Carol’s cheek and circled her thumb over her lips. “Carol … I ... you’re so ...“ She couldn’t finish because she was lost in the love flowing between them as they stared at one another.

Carol took Therese’s face in her hands and pulled her down for a long, deep kiss. Therese lowered her body and moved her hand behind the blonde’s neck and kneaded her breast with her other hand as they kissed. They both moaned and Carol moved one of her hands to Therese’s neck and tangled her hand in her hair. Her hips were moving against the smaller woman, searching for contact. She broke the kiss and gasped, “Therese, I need you … fuck …”

Therese kissed and nipped down to Carol’s breast and took it into her mouth. She nipped the tip and sucked it. “Baby, I’m going to do this to your clit.” 

“Fuck … Therese, don’t tease ...” Carol’s hips bucked into her lover. 

Therese circled her tongue around her nipple and flattened her tongue over it then gently took it between her teeth, released it and sucked it into her mouth again.

“Now angel … do it now … please ...” she begged and moved her hands into her lover’s thick dark hair, then tried to push her lower. 

“Mmmm …” Therese hummed against her other breast as she took that nipple into her mouth. She slowly slid her hand from Carol’s neck down to her breast and kneaded and lightly pinched while she kissed and sucked the other. The blonde moaned and writhed below her. Therese smiled and traced her nose down between her lover’s breasts and kissed her flat stomach. She moved her body down and kissed and nipped the inside of Carol’s thighs, then spread them a little bit farther apart, opening her lover to her.

Therese lowered her face to Carol and nuzzled her nose in the soft blonde curls, inhaling her lover’s scent. “Oh god ... baby, I’m so drunk on you … the highest of highs ...” Carol hips bucked and she balled her fingers into a fist, gathering Therese’s hair and pulling it. Therese slowly ran her tongue between her folds, tasting her for the first time. “Mmmmm …” she hummed against Carol’s clit as she circled it with her tongue.

“Therese!” the blonde cried out moving one of her hands to grab the sheets. Her hips were moving, searching for contact. 

The smaller woman wrapped her arms under her lover’s hips and kneaded the soft skin she found. “I was right, you taste amazing … mmmmm,” she hummed against her again, driving the blonde wild. Therese continued to lick from her clit to her entrance and back, taking Carol higher with every stroke. She entered her with her tongue, then circled her entrance and licked back up to her clit. She could feel her own wetness between her thighs, her clit throbbing as she made love to Carol.

“Fuck! Therese!” Carol bucked her hips and lifted her head, watching her lover between her legs, her thighs moving to the sides of her lover’s head as her hips moved in rhythm with Therese’s tongue.

Therese looked up into Carol’s eyes and then brought her hand to replace her tongue and entered her lover with her finger. She curled it and moved it slowly in and out. She continued to lick her folds, then circled and sucked Carol’s clit, driving the woman to the edge. 

“Yes, like that … fuck Therese you’re … fuck … right there ...” Carol gasped.

Her thighs tightened against Therese’s head. She added a finger and increased her pace. Carol pushed herself into Therese’s mouth and took in her fingers. Therese’s hips were moving in response to Carol’s reactions to her. She thought she might cum just from Carol’s cries and movements.

“Fuck, Therese! Fuck … Therese!” Carol cried out, her eyes slammed shut and her head fell to the pillow as her back arched and her body went rigid.

Therese could feel her lover’s walls contracting against her fingers when Carol’s hips came up off the bed, her thighs squeezing her head as her lover’s orgasm hit her hard. She moved her fingers slowly, curling them inside, prolonging Carol’s pleasure. Therese kissed her clit one more time and made the blonde’s hips jump. She smiled and slowly removed her fingers from her lover. She crawled up between her legs and rested her body on top of Carol, positioning her legs on either side of her lover’s thigh.

Carol rolled them so Therese was on her back and fed her arm under her lover’s neck, tucking her head into her. She moved her hand over Therese’s breasts, then down her stomach and into her dark curls. Her fingers found her lover’s wet hot silk and slid inside. She moved them in and out and slowly circled her thumb around Therese’s swollen clit. “You’re so fucking amazing. I can’t get enough of you.” She started to move down, but Therese held her.

“Oh god ... Carol ... you feel so good. I’m so close … keep doing what you’re doing … fuck ...” Therese gasped as she bent her leg and rocked her hips toward Carol and pressed into the blonde’s hand.

Carol was still trying to recover, but was still incredibly aroused by her lover. She kissed Therese hard. “Cum for me, my angel. I want to feel you,” she whispered as she moved in and out faster, matching Therese’s movements.

“Carol! Oh god … fuck!” Therese moved her hips fast, holding Carol tight and cried out again as her climax hit her hard.

Carol could feel her walls squeezing her fingers. She pushed them a little deeper and curled them forward, trying to give Therese as much pleasure as she could. She wrapped her long leg over the smaller woman’s hip and held her close as they both recovered. She slowly removed her fingers from inside her lover and they lay side by side, looking into each other’s eyes as their hands slowly caressed one another.

“Therese, that was amazing, beyond anything I’ve ever experienced,” Carol said softly, as she gazed into the eyes of the woman she loved.

“Me too. You’re phenomenal,” Therese replied as she drowned in the deep blue eyes of her lover.

“I want to taste you,” Carol whispered in Therese’s ear, then kissed her neck.

“Mmmm, I’d like that.” Therese flattened her hand on Carol’s chest. “Can we take a nap first?”

“Mmm hmm, turn over, angel.”

Therese rolled over and Carol pulled the covers up over them. The smaller woman backed into her lover and was enveloped in her arms. She took Carol’s hand and rested her arm on top of the hers. The blonde brought her legs up and curled around Therese. She moved her hair and kissed the top of her back. They both drifted off, safe and warm in each other’s arms.


End file.
